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A rant about interacting with liars and cheaters

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Everyday we are confronted with people who lie and cheat to have it their way. It can be your neighbour who is littering the cellar and blaming it on the other people living in the building or a work colleague who is pretending to do work with shuffling paperwork and surfing "Das Bild" online all day long. It could be even someone who you recently met at a seminar, who is proposing that you "should meet spontaneously" cause it's "exciting" but the reality is that he is married and the reason why he cannot make it to normal appointments is not because it's not exciting but because he has a wife.

 

First thing that comes to your mind: Do these people really think they are so smart and the others are plain dumb?!? :angry:

 

Usually I am not angered by such crap, I calmly let the person that what she/he is presenting is a bunch of BS. Getting into an argument or a discussion does not do well since liars and cheaters tend to be in denial, and they rarely confess.

 

So what's your strategy in dealing with such people?

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Involving them in a discussion about liars and cheaters. Invariably, they will say how much they despise them. Then you can brand them as liars, cheaters and hypocrites as well.

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@lifeisabuffet

 

How did you know what I was doing? We dont even work in the same office, let alone the same country.

lol. You didn't know that I have access to your computer? :)

 

 

Critical question: Are we talking about clients?

Clients are a total different ballgame. How do you react when a client makes up a story and tries to screw you over?

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Do these people really think they are so smart and the others are plain dumb?!?

Yes, I think the ones who actually set out to cheat and defraud people have a contempt for other people. They see them as targets who are themselves at fault if they believe the lies and allow themselves to be cheated.

 

I ran into a "financial advisor" a few years ago who tried to cheat me. Luckily, I got myself out of the situation before I lost any money. But he had spent quite a while spinning a series of lies, all with an apparently straightforward manner. But, once I'd become suspicious, I did manage to make him uncomfortable by catching him in a lie: I asked him the same question twice (at an interval of several weeks) and he gave me a different answer the second time around. When I pointed this out, he squirmed. ^_^

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It could be even someone who you recently met at a seminar, who is proposing that you "should meet spontaneously" cause it's "exciting" but the reality is that he is married and the reason why he cannot make it to normal appointments is not because it's not exciting but because he has a wife.

you got screwed and now you are angry cause you are only his second choice...

Isn't there a rule, what happend on TDY stays on TDY so stop asking for online advice in your adultary case

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So what's your strategy in dealing with such people?

Since everyone is generally full of shit in some capacity at some point, I generally call the strategy human interaction. Or i've been watching reruns of House too much lately and have it stuck in my head that "everyone lies".

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Liars, cheats, gossipers and shit stirrers. I work for a company that seems to have them all. Never have I experienced a more trouble-making group than here at my place of employment. How have I been dealing with it? Told them head-on that I knew they were doing it and it has to stop and that if they feel I was being unfair in any way shape or form they should take it up with HR and make an official complaint. Strange thing is that nobody has done it so far.

 

Verbal warnings and writing them up has helped a little but it still goes on. They just think they are being more intelligent about the whole thing. Always the same. If you gossip about others then you will be gossipped about yourself. They really appear to be so fucking stupid that they do not realise it at all and when confronted they get very upset indeed. Fucking idiots.

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Everyday we are confronted with people who lie and cheat to have it their way. It can be your neighbour who is littering the cellar and blaming it on the other people living in the building or a work colleague who is pretending to do work with shuffling paperwork and surfing "Das Bild" online all day long. It could be even someone who you recently met at a seminar, who is proposing that you "should meet spontaneously" cause it's "exciting" but the reality is that he is married and the reason why he cannot make it to normal appointments is not because it's not exciting but because he has a wife.

Thats how life is, LIAB..Thats how it is..! (So Ist Das)

 

Life is not a buffet...Life is a bitch! :ph34r:

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Speaking of liars and cheats, does anyone know the website for the German equivalent of 'Watchdog'? I have a bone to pick with a lying, cheating Makler c*nt.

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When I first looked for an apartment and a commercial rental, I was amazed at the outright, easily detected lies that the various real estate Maklers told me. For example, I asked one how long a storefront had been vacant and what had been there before. He said one month and that it had been an Apotheke that had only closed because the owner retired. I went next door to a florist and asked... 6 months and it had been an internet call shop that had closed because the owner had been busted for some sort of black market dealing. I had similar experiences with most of the other Maklers. I finally rented an apt. directly from a landlord. But in the case of the Makler with whom I dealt for the storefront, every word she said was a lie, including "a," "an," and "the". My attorney and I just started laughing at her after a while. That was amazingly effective. She got mad and abusive, but then stopped the constant stream of bullshit, settled down to business, and we finally got the deal done.

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you got screwed and now you are angry cause you are only his second choice...

Isn't there a rule, what happend on TDY stays on TDY so stop asking for online advice in your adultary case

Duh! I never flirted and I never dated and never been with a married guy in my life. I am annoyed cause he is freaking SMSing me and phoning me like a fucktard, cause he obviously thinks he has a chance with me. Your pea-brain is not capable of distinguishing between women who would go for a married man and who wouldn't. The reason why we exchanged phone numbers is because he works in my field. I have dozens of telephone numbers of guys who work in my field and this does not mean that I automatically want some kind of a relationship with them.

 

 

Thats how life is, LIAB..Thats how it is..! (So Ist Das)

 

Life is not a buffet...Life is a bitch!

Not really. Life is a buffet, but sometimes the food served at the buffet is not the kind you like to eat.

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Your pea-brain is not capable of distinguishing between women who would go for a married man and who wouldn't. The reason why we exchanged phone numbers is because he works in my field. I have dozens of telephone numbers of guys who work in my field and this does not mean that I automatically want some kind of a relationship with them.

Of course, that's why you complain in your original OP:

 

 

the reason why he cannot make it to normal appointments is not because it's not exciting but because he has a wife

If you do have dozens of phonenumbers of guys (like you claim), means that you are desperate my dear... and I'm not talking about a relation with them reither.

P.S. I bet he didn't have his ring on when you fell for him...

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Question. If you do not want anything to do with him then why not come and and tell him? I mean, that would put an end to it wouldn't it? You could also block his number

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Just try to avoid them if you can. Have as little to do with people like that as possible. In the case that a married co-worker is hitting on you say you're not interested in a very direct manner (not open to wishful interpretation by him). If you don't work together, even better, you don't have to stay as nice. Just tell him to fuck off (maybe not in these exact words).

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This is my latest experience in a string with one person. Time to call it a day.

 

Him: The Mayor of R... has requested the presence of the alphorns at his birthday bash. You are invited to the meal.

Me: No can do. Already have a concert.

Him (some time later): The Mayor of R... is so keen for the alphorns to be at his birthday bash he has altered the date of the party. You are invited to the meal.

Me: OK. Diary empty.

Him (later): It is a secret. A surprise. The Mayor must not get wind of this.

Me: Thought he was so keen to have us he changed his dates?

Him: No, that was a misunderstanding. ALARM BELLS

Him (a week before the party): Must ring the Mayor's wife so she can arrange for you to have places at the meal. ALARM BELLS

So we did our stint, he ruined it by playing like the beginner he is despite playing for 3 decades and the Mayor invited us for an aperitif. He could not invite us to the meal. (And why should he?)

The AH who got us on board for a free concert which he then sabotaged by his very skilful performance was himself of course a guest with a place at the meal. He either had not called the Mayor's wife or she had refused. Either way he could and should have told us that there would be no meal, just a drink. But he let us find out for ourselves causing embarrassment all round. We left without comment. Can't wait to see him again.

 

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The best thing is he has pulled this trick before. Same place, same Mayor. Organised an event. Several groups of alphorns. We were thanked at the end publically for having appeared on a voluntary basis. Then found out that the others had all received a cheque...

 

:blink:

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