Tip of the day

1,633 posts in this topic

Get all the excitement of a Christmas trip to Paris by simply staying at home and throwing a petrol bomb at a traffic warden.

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Pretend to be Theresa May at work by simply cancelling any jobs you don't fancy doing.

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Save money on going to the Christmas pantomime by simply watching the BBC Parliament channel.

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Save money on an expensive "Escape Room Experience" by simply going shopping in Ikea over Christmas.

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JEREMY CORBYN.

Avoid embarrassment in Parliament by growing a bushy beard to stop people lip-reading your comments, then  never speak again you ineffective prick.

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At the airport when the Customs Officer asks "Any weapons, drugs or alcohol?", don't answer "I've got all I need".   I know that now.

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Are you concerned that your children watch too much TV and don't read enough?

Simply mute the sound and put on the subtitles, voila! They're reading.

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