Why are you unhappy today?

12,323 posts in this topic

17 minutes ago, optimista said:

John, you made the earth move ?

All 9 stone of me, optimista😂

The sofa weighs more than me!!

Some of the older people we know in town today ( Ierapetra ) were  talking about the " seismos " of about 30 years ago or so ( or more ) when the whole population rushed to the beach for safety.

 

This one was last year:

 

https://www.dw.com/en/strong-earthquake-strikes-greek-island-of-crete/a-53312400

 

There are NO high buildings in the whole town. Not surprised- tremors are really frequent.

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Blimey, the sofa moved again an hour ago. Not as long a tremor as yesterday but... hm, is a biggie coming?

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20 hours ago, john g. said:

Some of the older people we know in town today ( Ierapetra ) were  talking about the " seismos " of about 30 years ago or so ( or more ) when the whole population rushed to the beach for safety.

 

There was a tsunami warning so probably best to plan out somewhere else to shelter on higher ground.    It is not something that is likely to happen, but

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2 hours ago, john g. said:

Blimey, the sofa moved again an hour ago. Not as long a tremor as yesterday but... hm, is a biggie coming?

The news here are talking about this new quake on Crete, and that people were warned not to return to their houses...

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1 hour ago, Metall said:

The news here are talking about this new quake on Crete, and that people were warned not to return to their houses...

 

The whole island or just certain areas?

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1 hour ago, Metall said:

The news here are talking about this new quake on Crete, and that people were warned not to return to their houses...

 

8 minutes ago, fraufruit said:

The whole island or just certain areas?

 

I just listened to the news again - they said today's quake was 5.3 on the scale (versus 5.8 yesterday), and the warning was about the entire island.

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Haven't had to check out the latest on where to stay at home today or not. We've just got back from Takis's shelter- our first visit there. 30C, dusty and noisy up in the hills !!

Dogs and cats and goats everywhere. We met Takis, who broke his arm yesterday when he was attacked by a billy goat! Patched up but still riding around checking the animals!

 

IMG_7490.jpg

PHOTO-2021-09-28-14-40-04.jpg

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Strange day today! It started with finding a stunned rat in the patio ( Mr Grey was responsible ) and then, after we had just filled the car up with petrol ( no, we are not in the UK!), we were going along a road up into the hills and , suddenly , smoke came out of the engine. We quickly found some water  to douse it, grabbed the dogs out of the car  and got on the phone to ADAC Athens.

We were in the middle of nowhere as far as walking home was concerned but, fortunately, a car stopped.

 

An Albanian from our village- "I know you both. You sometimes give my sister and brother work. I want to help."

 

So he drove us back to the village.👍

The guy from the car rescue company picked me up in the village and we drove to the car, which he then delivered to the mechanic in town.

 

So tomorrow we await the call from the mechanic. God knows how long it will take - spare parts etc.

🙁

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The beast in man, John. Twas ever thus. And will not change. Did you consider changing your reading habits ? I get on better not knowing about this sort of stuff. Seriously. It is bad for our mental health.

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Long story shot: Nothing of that is your fault.

And you having turned into a good person is not their gain.

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I second Sannerl! You have overcome a bad parent and a lot of hurt they keep trying to do to you.

 

You.Are.A.Winner.

 

Seriously, you have a life, while that sad person just has a miserable existence.

To be very honest, cut the ties completely. You tried all you could, and it is better to move on.

 

I did that with a bad parent for ten years, and it was a very good time in my life.
I am cutting ties with another very bad relative, and it is giving me the space to breathe.

 

1 hour ago, emkay said:

During my adulthood, I’ve realised that she’s a notorious liar so I’ve no idea what is true.  

 

Oh God, I know that. My bad parent lied when they opened their mouth. Promises (rescinded once they got what they wanted, or just for the Hell of it), nasty mean gossip, manipulation, playing own kids off against each other, complaints, reproaches, lies, lies, and LIES.
I know where you are coming from, and feel for you.

The remedy is - as with real, physical poison, to stay away from this mental poison.

->

Would you keep rat poison in your spice cupboard, to sprinkle on your food? No!

Would you keep a bottle of cyanide with your wine, to add a drop to every sip! NO!

You would throw the poison out, to protect you and your family!

And in the same way, you must must clean your mental house, and throw out all that horrid stuff.
And refuse to go and shop for more poison! Meaning go full no contact. Do not answer calls or letters, do not visit, and yes, turn her away when she pounds on your door. (Yes, I did that. Best decision ever.)


Do not expect/hope/want anything at all from her. There is nothing to give, or get, or to clarify.
There is no truth to be found. You already have the only truth  - that all this is poison and you must stay from it.

And yes, it is permitted to talk to a therapist, a cleric, a good friend, and work on clearing the poison from your system.
Detoxing from a horrible relationship is real work. It warrants time, money, effort, and you are worth it.

I got a bit passionate here. :) All the best, @emkay 
Remember, you've won. :wub:

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Sounds like we have similar mothers so I can empathise but you have your life and she has had hers. If she is bitter and full of hate then that's fine you just get on with your life. Whilst Philip Larkin's poem goes on about how we're messed up by our parents his conclusion is a bit OTT. So she might be your mother but doesn't mean she has to be loved or obeyed. You have your family, that's what counts.

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