Gay marriage between an American and a German

[almosthadyou 0]

Hello,

 

I need help and I hope that someone here will be able to assist me.

 

I am a 24 year old man who is in the process of trying to arrange an "Eingetragene Lebensgemeinschaft" with my boyfriend in Berlin in order to solidify our commitment to each other and in order for me to get a visa to stay in Berlin.

 

Aside from the obvious: needing a certified translated copy of my birth certificate, my parent's marriage certificate, and my passport, what are the steps involved, costs involved, etc? As much information as can be provided would be so helpful.

 

We are looking to marry in June.

 

Thanks for your help!

[MichiS 39]

Get your partner to go/to call to the Standesamt and have him ask there.

As you don't live in Bavaria and have a gay mayor in Berlin it should be pretty much the same as a hetero-wedding.

[TroyBoy 8]

Morning,

 

I did this in July this year, however in Munich, so the info I provide may not be of much use, as I think Berlin is under different laws but still similar.

 

First thing is relax, I thought the process was going to be hell, however it was easy.

 

For me (I am Australian), I needed to get my birth cert, and single status certificate from Australia, have them stamped with a apostille stamp (I think i spelt that wrong) in Australia, they were then sent to me here iin Munich, where we had to get these forms translated. this translation process cost about 170 euro as the stamps had to be redone in german (My translater man looked after that).

 

My partner (German) had to get his Birth cert and his single status cert as well.

 

What is a single status cert.. its a doc that proves you have never been married, or that you were and are now divorced, you will not be able to process with anything unless you have this doc.

 

We didn't have to prove how long we have been together, show photos or any of that crap.

 

We then met with the Notarin who was holding the service in Munich. Now these guys were great they advised us on everything, did our paperwork and the service (45 min) for a total of 260 euro.

 

A week later they sent us all the docs we went to the KV office and in 20 minutes my visa was all sorted and everthing was registered.

 

What else you may need.

1.We had to have a translater to tranlate the entire service, as it is a legal binding contract. As German wasn't my mother tounge everything had to be done in both languages (this could cost a bit)

 

2. We had a prenup drawn up, that was our choice, however i think you need to draw up a commitment contract, its regarding future earnings etc etc (however that could be law just down here)

 

3. Get drunk and celebrate

 

I contacted the Aussie embassy in Berlin who sent me an info kit on Gay Marriages and that was a big help, so you should contact yours.

 

Re the cost, it depends on the legal contract side etc, we were lucky as one of our friends here is a lawyer and we saved a heap of cash, he also was the translater of the ceremony. This is where it could get costly.

 

You should also meet with the Gay info service in Berlin, the guys in the Munich office were a great help.

 

Let me know if I can be of futher help or if I have just confused the hell out of you

 

and all the best

 

PS sorry about the spelling, however I cant be bothered to check!

[TroyBoy 8]

Dude, I just noticed your 24, this is great for you if you have found the man of your dreams, and will spend the rest of your life with him.

 

Can I say, without stepping on your toes, this Marriage is a big deal (and I know you understand that), and the contract which you sign is heavy, and I mean heavy. Make sure for yourself you understand everything in the contract, and if you can afford it get separate legal advice regarding it. I was shocked when it first came to me, we then had a lot of changes put in the standard one. Then we did a prenup as well (ok we have business involved, as well both our parents are getting on, so we needed to protect our inheritance etc etc)

 

Just ,make sure you have a full english version of the contract that you are signing. As I said once we had ours translated, I quickly had changes made and we had a prenup drawn up and that was two days before our big day.

 

I tried to be nice and friendly with this post, So I hope I havent offended you in anyway.

[almosthadyou 0]

Thank you for the help! I really appreciate it!!

 

I'll let you know if I have any more questions or run into any more obstacles.

[britMUC 4]

 

What is a single status cert.. its a doc that proves you have never been married, or that you were and are now divorced, you will not be able to process with anything unless you have this doc.

i have never heard of a single status certificate, apart from Germany. does anyone know if there an equivalent in the UK and where to turn to get one?

[TroyBoy 8]

@britmuc, Try Births deaths and marriages (or the uk marriage reg), I never heard of it before but then i was told you get it from the same place you register your marriage... what they dont know about us.

[MonksTown 104]

The law is the same in all the states.

 

In Bayern the govenment decided that gays would not have automatic access to the Registry Office (Standesamt) becasue in the words of the gladly mortal Beckstein gays didn't want any "tamtam" and should do it with a notar. Munich City Council decided however to open its Standesamt to gays as well, Ude wants the pink vote

 

Anyway, all the best.

Pre nup might be an idea and some advice around the whole idea of residency etc.

Can be a sticky issue.

[britMUC 4]

sorry, I know I'm going off topic here, but a single status certificate sounds pretty daft really. do they issue them here when a child is born? :P

[amimuc 0]

 

What else you may need.

1.We had to have a translater to tranlate the entire service, as it is a legal binding contract. As German wasn't my mother tounge everything had to be done in both languages (this could cost a bit)

You will only need a translator at the ceremony if you request one (because you think your German isnt good enough) OR if the notary/Standesbeamter decides that your German isnt good enough.

 

Also, if your home country does not issue certificates of single status, you can request that the notary draw up an "eidesstattliche Versicherung" that can be used in place of this document (for an extra fee, of course).

 

Good luck to you guys - my partner and I took the plunge in Feb. of this year. (Oh how that wedding band works on chambermaids and hotel clerks).

[MonksTown 104]

The gay wedding I went to in Germany had a notary who spoke very good English and he did it all bilingually as there were guests from all over the world and it had to be in English as well.

[amimuc 0]

It only HAS to be in English if the Notar determines that one of the partners is not able to understand the proceedings (native speaker of English, I assume). German is the only official language of Germany and the only "acceptable" language for legally binding contracts. Believe me, I was at my own gay wedding and the only language spoken was German.

[MonksTown 104]

;) Sorb, Firesan and Danish are also recognised in some regions as official languages but that is a side issue..

 

Yes, the actual legally binding contract bit has to be German but that was literally 2 minutes of a lovely wedding ceremony. Oooooh it was SO romantic. :)

[britMUC 4]

 

@britmuc, Try Births deaths and marriages (or the uk marriage reg), I never heard of it before but then i was told you get it from the same place you register your marriage... what they dont know about us.

I checked out the The General Register Office in the UK, and it's not something they offer online. perhaps one needs to contact them personally. but after a bit of googling, it would seem this single status certificate is also knows as a Certificate of No Impediment or Certificate of Celibacy ... hmm, i wouldn't mind loosing my virginity again :D

[MonksTown 104]

Me too and I'd choose someone more attractive to lose it to and all who didn't have <censored for TMI issues> <_<

[almosthadyou 0]

Does anyone know where/if I can get a certificate of non-impediment in the United States?

 

Also, do I need to have my translated AND stamped with an Apostille stamp? or just stamped?

 

Thanks

[TroyBoy 8]

the docs need to be stamped in your home country and then translated and stamped again. I know this is pain but its what they need.

 

I recommend to speak to someone who runs the ceremony in Berlin and make sure you understand everything that you may need.

 

Re the contract - the official one that has to be signed is yes in deutsch, however I recommend to get it translated into English so you understand everything. My partner thought he has explained everything right into English, but missed some major stuff, which is I am glad we had it translated - costs a lot, but if anything goes wrong we are now 100% protected.

[Tomasino 5]

Hi there!

 

I just want to reiterate that 24 can be pretty young, but it all depends. If you have really, honestly thought everything out, then I would like to say:

 

Happy Union!

[britMUC 4]

@ hyprlykeme

you don't need to wait till you're over 40 to get married ... if you're happy man, go for it!! congrats & happy wedding planning!!

[amimuc 0]

 

Does anyone know where/if I can get a certificate of non-impediment in the United States?

 

Also, do I need to have my translated AND stamped with an Apostille stamp? or just stamped?

 

Thanks

Go onto your state's vital records website and it should tell you how to order an Apostille (has to be signed by the Secretary of your state's office). A lot of times you can order it online and have it mailed directly to Germany.

 

As for your "certificate of non-impediment" - as far as I know (I'm American), no U.S. state issues such a document. I told the notary this and they drew up an "eidesstattliche Versicherung" that declared I had never been married. I had to sign this in front of the notary and I think it cost around 40 Euros or something. Anyway, it did the trick.