Mistakenly missed few items in cart to pay. Kaufland filed police complaint.

78 posts in this topic

4 hours ago, DoubleDTown said:

It's been a week.  OP should have called a lawyer the next morning.

Do not talk to the police without talking to a lawyer first.  You are not required to present any evidence against yourself.  Maybe Kaufland lost their tape.  Maybe the police lost their file.  Don't add to the pile of info stacked against you.

Reading between the lines, OP has no independent income, hubby earns 100k  year, OP has not been to see a lawyer yet.

Sorry to say, my guess is hubby doesn't know and OP came here to see if there was a way of dealing with this without him knowing.

 

If that's the case, then it's not a bad thing, it's still a valid reason to come here, but I think advice may have been different if that is case. 

 

 

2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, cb6dba said:

Reading between the lines,

favorite TT past time...that and mind reading.

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
11 hours ago, dessa_dangerous said:

You will be found guilty whether you admit to it or not.  

so, why bother with courts?

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
10 hours ago, dessa_dangerous said:

 

care to explain?

If someone came to me and said "I've been caught taking stuff from a shop' I'd say 'go check with a lawyer".

 

If someone came up to me and said "I've been caught taking stuff from a shop and my partner is the only person earning an income and I really don't want them to know about this" i'd advise them not look for lawyers that offer a free first consolation.

 

Not all do and it's best to know that so you can look for the ones that do.

 

What did you think I meant?

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
10 hours ago, catjones said:

favorite TT past time...that and mind reading.

Yep, highlighted that a person with a household income of 100K, does not work themselves and is asking internet people for legal advice.

So I guess we could add 'giving advice that should be given by a professional' to that list. 

 

All perfectly fine though, it's three of the reasons we are here.

 

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, cb6dba said:

What did you think I meant?

 

as so often, I had little idea, but in this case I was really perplexed because I haven't the foggiest idea what this person's husband has to do with any of it.  It seemed like to you the woman is and/or should, ought to be at the mercy of her husband and it struck me as really weird for you to be infantalizing a grown woman that way.  If it had been a man who had been caught would you ask if his spouse knew and that's why he was asking us instead of going to a lawyer?  Or would he have been allowed to ask us this question without anyone wondering what his "boss" thought of the whole thing?  Yeah, I guess I know the answer you'll give, but it rubbed me up the wrong way.  Still does.

2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
6 hours ago, catjones said:

so, why bother with courts?

 

If she claims not to be guilty they'll have to go to court (so security/Kaufland can testify against her)?  If she just cops to it they'll fine her and ban her and that'll be it?  Isn't that how it works?

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@cb6dba but the question I really wanted answered was, why do you think people would have given different advice based on... whatever your point was there?  How would the advice have differed?  

 

Nothing I said took anything into account other than the information she presented here and her husband being aware of the situation wouldn't have changed any of it.  

 

I'm still scratching my head on that one.

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
21 minutes ago, dessa_dangerous said:

 

as so often, I had little idea, but in this case I was really perplexed because I haven't the foggiest idea what this person's husband has to do with any of it.  It seemed like to you the woman is and/or should, ought to be at the mercy of her husband and it struck me as really weird for you to be infantalizing a grown woman that way.  If it had been a man who had been caught would you ask if his spouse knew and that's why he was asking us instead of going to a lawyer?  Or would he have been allowed to ask us this question without anyone wondering what his "boss" thought of the whole thing?  Yeah, I guess I know the answer you'll give, but it rubbed me up the wrong way.  Still does.

 

How did I infantize her? None of that came from me.

If the OP was a guy and the posts were the same, I would have said exactly the same things. The gender of the OP makes no difference to me on this, the circumstances would be the same. It is possible for the hubby in a marriage to have done something they don't want the wife to know about. If memory serves me correctly (may not) we had a post years ago regarding illegal downloads, the guy didn't want his gf to know about that.

(Actually, that could have been me when I was up in berlin, on a different forum)

 

15 minutes ago, dessa_dangerous said:

 

If she claims not to be guilty they'll have to go to court (so security/Kaufland can testify against her)?  If she just cops to it they'll fine her and ban her and that'll be it?  Isn't that how it works?

 

Yes, and that is a good example of how the advice may change.

Going to court would no doubt mean hubby knowing what is going on, if OP doesn't want hubby knowing, then pleading not guilty would be of the table. That applies if the person with the problem is male or female.

 

If the OP just wants this to go away quietly, then fighting this may not be an option.

 

As ever on TT, giving the bigger picture helps people give advice. People don't have to, they have the right to only give as much as they feel comfortable with, but missing anything important out will cause advice to not be 100% applicable.

 

If a poster says 'was caught doing this, don't want partner to find out' it opens up a whole other areas. Can the OP use their legal insurance (if they have any) without their partner finding out, can they just accept the whole thing and pay the fine without their partner finding out? Is being banned from that shop going to be an issue if they are out shopping with their partner?  

Would just coming clean and telling partner be easier.

 

All this is guess work, but having a partner that earns 100k a year and coming to us for advice? 

 

I think most of you are great and I'd meet any of that 'most' for a beer, but I wouldn't ask for legal advice when I could afford it, unless I didn't want the Mrs to know...

 

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
2 hours ago, cb6dba said:

How did I infantize her?

 

by asking if/assuming that she hadn't told her husband.  She said it was a mistake.  Why should she hide the issue from him, especially if it was unintentional?

 

Your post(s) have distinct "naughty little housewife didn't tell hubby what she's been up to all day" vibes to them.  You claim you'd speak to adult man the same way.  Noted. I have no choice but to take your word for it.

 

The advice not to contest the charge had zero to do with whether she could afford legal insurance or explain to any third person why she can't shop at KL anymore and everything to do with the actual circumstances, which is that she did actually do it and fighting the charge is pointless and wasteful and could even end up working to her disadvantage.  Not only is her relationship with her husband none of my business and wholly irrelevant to the question asked, but also none of it will make a difference in the end.

 

This question has been asked and answered a thousand times on TT and FB.  You say you wouldn't ask us.  That's your prerogative, but sooooo many people have asked others online what they should do when they've been caught shoplifting that we know how to answer even though we ourselves have not been in the same situation. 

 

However, this is the first time I've seen anyone ask whether they had told their spouses or partners. 

 

Whatever your reasoning is for asking, it is irrelevant to the issue at hand.  I know we are nosy on TT and try to get the juicy details out of people for tax while claiming it is "so we can help them better," but in this case, it's really a stretch.  In my opinion.  Sorry.

2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
12 minutes ago, dessa_dangerous said:

 

by asking if/assuming that she hadn't told her husband.  She said it was a mistake.  Why should she hide the issue from him, especially if it was unintentional?

 

Your post(s) have distinct "naughty little housewife didn't tell hubby what she's been up to all day" vibes to them.  You claim you'd speak to adult man the same way.  Noted. I have no choice but to take your word for it.

 

The advice not to contest the charge had zero to do with whether she could afford legal insurance or explain to any third person why she can't shop at KL anymore and everything to do with the actual circumstances, which is that she did actually do it and fighting the charge is pointless and wasteful and could even end up working to her disadvantage.  Not only is her relationship with her husband none of my business and wholly irrelevant to the question asked, but also none of it will make a difference in the end.

 

This question has been asked and answered a thousand times on TT and FB.  You say you wouldn't ask us.  That's your prerogative, but sooooo many people have asked others online what they should do when they've been caught shoplifting that we know how to answer even though we ourselves have not been in the same situation. 

 

However, this is the first time I've seen anyone ask whether they had told their spouses or partners. 

 

Whatever your reasoning is for asking, it is irrelevant to the issue at hand.  I know we are nosy on TT and try to get the juicy details out of people for tax while claiming it is "so we can help them better," but in this case, it's really a stretch.  In my opinion.  Sorry.

The light shining on all this is coming from your torch.

 

And I didn't ask anything, I also didn't assume, I just said that should something be the case, advice would be different. You are assuming there contrary to what was written.

From your initial question of 'why' we are now at "naughty little housewife didn't tell hubby what she's been up to all day".

 

You're driving this bus, not me. 

1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I've said it twice, in response to your question (about exactly that) and comments.

 

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
32 minutes ago, dessa_dangerous said:

Your post(s) have distinct "naughty little housewife didn't tell hubby what she's been up to all day" vibes to them.

👍🤮

32 minutes ago, dessa_dangerous said:

 You claim you'd speak to adult man the same way.

🙄

32 minutes ago, dessa_dangerous said:

However, this is the first time I've seen anyone ask whether they had told their spouses or partners. 

The question is simply none of his beeswax

1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
21 hours ago, catjones said:

I agree with you.  You did not willfully shoplift, so to that charge I would reply "not guilty".

You are the Judge and the Jury. How do you know? That is a rhetorical question. 

1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
7 minutes ago, cb6dba said:

I've said it twice, in response to your question (about exactly that) and comments.

 

 

Maybe this is down to formulation.  Perhaps you should have said your advice would have been different.  

 

As a person who gave her that advice, you don't speak for me.  Only yourself.  You care whether she told her husband and think it makes a difference.

 

Then say so.  But don't claim that generally she would have gotten different advice.  She would have gotten different advice from you.  Not from me. Don't know about the others.

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
12 minutes ago, dessa_dangerous said:

 

Maybe this is down to formulation.  Perhaps you should have said your advice would have been different.  

 

As a person who gave her that advice, you don't speak for me.  Only yourself.  You care whether she told her husband and think it makes a difference.

 

Then say so.  But don't claim that generally she would have gotten different advice.  She would have gotten different advice from you.  Not from me. Don't know about the others.

I'm not sure this is about formulation, but perception.

I actually said the advice may have been different, conditional, as in different situation/more information may change what people advise.

No general claim from me, as I said before, this is your torch.

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
23 hours ago, catjones said:

I agree with you.  You did not willfully shoplift, so to that charge I would reply "not guilty".

 

1 hour ago, McDee said:

You are the Judge and the Jury. How do you know? That is a rhetorical question. 

 

Because that's what the OP said.  I'm not judging, I'd let the courts do that.

 

On 3/6/2021, 12:44:56, hellotoy said:

On the cash counter, I missed some items in the upper, smaller section in the cart and my cart passed through the counter without paying for them.

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!


Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.


Sign In Now