Just signed an apartment contract with a partner and he now wants to take 'a break'

23 posts in this topic

Background : Myself and my boyfriend were living in a WG and we have been looking for an apartment together in Berlin for 9+ months and have finally secured one and signed the contract two weeks ago with a view to move on the 1st. November. But he has now got cold feet and needs time to consider whether he wants to continue with our relationship (we've been together 4 years, in our early 30s). Obviously I'm heartbroken but he's my best friend and respect his need to have some time to think. He is planning to stay in our WG (his friend's place) until he decides what to do. 

 

I would like to still move into the apartment and best case scenario he decides that he'd like to join me. But if he decides not too, I would like to stay in the apartment, financially it's not an issue for me to cover the full rent, and I guess we would ask the landlord to release him from the lease. 

 

The Catch : The landlady is incredibly risk averse and wouldn't initially rent to us because my partner is English (brexit) despite having residency and a permanent contract. And then we had to submit insane amounts of paperwork and jump through a ton of hoops. She allowed the previous tenant to sublet for a year to a couple (as he wanted to move in with his partner) with a view that they could then take the lease but she decided against them last minute due to the woman moving to part-time work, hence we secured the apartment.

 

I work freelance, and even though I earn 5x the warm rent, healthy savings and have letters from long term clients and whole forests of paperwork from my account and tax returns, I suspect that without a dual income she won't want me to stay.

 

In the ideal (not ideal) situation we wouldn't say anything to the landlady until my partner has time to decide what to he wants to do and if he sadly chooses not to move in, we could then ask her to remove him from the lease and hope that since we've paid rent on time for a few months she may be more lenient. BUT there is a section in the contract that states that we have to register within one week and send her a copy of our Anmeldung, so the cat will be out of the bag from week one.

 

Sorry about the long post, fairly stressed about the prospect of being homeless on top of everything - I've seen friends in Berlin search for 6-12 months even just to find a room in a WG.

 

My questions : 

  • Should I get a lawyer and is there any hope that there is a case to let me stay in light that I can afford it?
  • If she does try to evict us/me, will the the 3 month notice period apply so I have some time to try and find a new place?

 

TIA for any help + guidance!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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1 hour ago, FykoBerlin said:

Should I get a lawyer and is there any hope that there is a case to let me stay in light that I can afford it?

 

You should a Mieterverein today. I would recommend:

 

https://www.berliner-mieterverein.de/

 

1 hour ago, FykoBerlin said:

BUT there is a section in the contract that states that we have to register within one week and send her a copy of our Anmeldung, so the cat will be out of the bag from week one.

 

BTW, do you already have an appointment? It is very difficult to get an appointment within a week. ATM there are free appointments for the end of November.

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46 minutes ago, FykoBerlin said:

...

 

In the ideal (not ideal) situation we wouldn't say anything to the landlady until my partner has time to decide what to he wants to do and if he sadly chooses not to move in, we could then ask her to remove him from the lease and hope that since we've paid rent on time for a few months she may be more lenient. BUT there is a section in the contract that states that we have to register within one week and send her a copy of our Anmeldung, so the cat will be out of the bag from week one.

 

...

 

 

To be honest this is what I would suggest.

Move in, say nothing.  If she questions it just state you had an argument and he is staying at a friends.

Or move in, and when asked tell the truth.  Burst into tears and expose your sorrow and sole to her.  And the next few times when asked, then just burst into tears again.

 

As for the Anmeldung then you could either:

1)  ask your boyfriend to register at the new address initially, provide it to the landlady, then he can change it back again.

2)  register yourself and provide.  Then tell the landlady the situation, or that you have had an argument and he is currently staying elsewhere for a few weeks (but will be back soon!)

3)  just state that she needs to ask your boyfriend herself, as you have told him but he still hasn't done it (knowing that she will never see him!)

 

 

Remember that once you are moved-in then it is very difficult for the landlady to get you out.  As long as you pay the rent and are a good neighbour then she has no reason to kick you out and trying to do so via the courts will be a waste of her money as she would lose and anyway take months!

 

 

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9 minutes ago, dj_jay_smith said:

 

To be honest this is what I would suggest.

Move in, say nothing.  If she questions it just state you had an argument and he is staying at a friends.

 

DJ, I think that's a bit risky and may set off alarm bells straight away if she says they had an argument. It would be far easier to say he is visiting family and leave it as that.

 

As you say once she is in as long the rent is paid there isn't a great deal the landlady can do but I also second what Engelchen said to join the Mietverein.

 

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51 minutes ago, engelchen said:

 

You should a Mieterverein today. I would recommend:

 

https://www.berliner-mieterverein.de/

 

 

BTW, do you already have an appointment? It is very difficult to get an appointment within a week. ATM there are free appointments for the end of November.

 

No appointment yet but will book one when we/I move in to at least to buy some more time as I'm aware that free slots are usually 3-6 weeks in the future.

 

Will join a mieterverein today, thanks for posting the link.

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26 minutes ago, Sir Percy B said:

 

DJ, I think that's a bit risky and may set off alarm bells straight away if she says they had an argument. It would be far easier to say he is visiting family and leave it as that.

 

As you say once she is in as long the rent is paid there isn't a great deal the landlady can do but I also second what Engelchen said to join the Mietverein.

 

 

TBH I think anything I say is gonna set off alarm bells with her as legally we need to be registered within 2 weeks and should have planned around any family trips.

 

I guess my real question is in the worst case scenario that she won't accept me as a tenant and wants to evict me, will the 3 month notice period apply so that I can try and find a room or something.

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52 minutes ago, dj_jay_smith said:

 

To be honest this is what I would suggest.

Move in, say nothing.  If she questions it just state you had an argument and he is staying at a friends.

Or move in, and when asked tell the truth.  Burst into tears and expose your sorrow and sole to her.  And the next few times when asked, then just burst into tears again.

 

As for the Anmeldung then you could either:

1)  ask your boyfriend to register at the new address initially, provide it to the landlady, then he can change it back again.

2)  register yourself and provide.  Then tell the landlady the situation, or that you have had an argument and he is currently staying elsewhere for a few weeks (but will be back soon!)

3)  just state that she needs to ask your boyfriend herself, as you have told him but he still hasn't done it (knowing that she will never see him!)

 

 

Remember that once you are moved-in then it is very difficult for the landlady to get you out.  As long as you pay the rent and are a good neighbour then she has no reason to kick you out and trying to do so via the courts will be a waste of her money as she would lose and anyway take months!

 

 

 

I appreciate the advice, thank you. I think option 1 is not feasible, he doesn't want to the hassle of registering and re-registering - and if our current landlady looked it up, we're back to square 1. 

 

I think option 2 will have to be the way forward and face the consequences :/

 

I love Berlin but the housing situation is wild, and that said from someone who has lived in London and is from Dublin!

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Afaik once you are in there it is not that easy to kick you out again. Thats why you should join Mieterverein for proper legal advice.

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7 minutes ago, FykoBerlin said:

TBH I think anything I say is gonna set off alarm bells with her as legally we need to be registered within 2 weeks and should have planned around any family trips.

 

That is a legal fiction. The government offices are understaffed and it is usually not possible to obtain an appointment within 2 weeks.

 

Have you already received the Wohnungsgeberbestätigung?

 

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1 hour ago, dj_jay_smith said:

Burst into tears and expose your sorrow and sole to her.  And the next few times when asked, then just burst into tears again.

 do you really think all women can do this on a whim?

 

do you really think ANY woman should do this on a whim?

 

it's kinda like advising men to get violent on a whim.  Flummoxed.

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58 minutes ago, lisa13 said:

 do you really think all women can do this on a whim?

 

do you really think ANY woman should do this on a whim?

..

 

What I was suggesting is acting.  

 

And why do you assume that the OP is a woman?   And Men are also perfectly capable of acting in this manner if they so wish.

 

 

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1 hour ago, engelchen said:

 

That is a legal fiction. The government offices are understaffed and it is usually not possible to obtain an appointment within 2 weeks.

 

Have you already received the Wohnungsgeberbestätigung?

 

 

Not yet, but should do in the next few days - the landlady lives in Munich

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5 minutes ago, FykoBerlin said:

 

Not yet, but should do in the next few days - the landlady lives in Munich

 

So she won't actually notice if your boyfriend is living there or not.

 

Join the Mieterverein and make an appointment to anmelden after you get the Wohnungsgeberbestätigung (she is not supposed to even send it till after you've moved in). Wait till she asks for the Anmeldebestätigung.

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48 minutes ago, dj_jay_smith said:

 

What I was suggesting is acting.  

 

And why do you assume that the OP is a woman?   And Men are also perfectly capable of acting in this manner if they so wish.

 

 

 

big fat eye roll emoji

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7 hours ago, FykoBerlin said:

TBH I think anything I say is gonna set off alarm bells with her as legally we need to be registered within 2 weeks and should have planned around any family trips.

No. Just because you´re renting a place doesn´t mean you have to live there. Therefore, the fact that your bf isn´t moving in is no valid reason for the landlady to terminate the lease. There is no need for you to make up any story - you can simply tell her the truth or deny to give her any reason. I don´t see your problem (in that regard). All she needs to know is how many people are living there so that she can calculate your utilities correctly.

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14 minutes ago, jeba said:

Just because you´re renting a place doesn´t mean you have to live there.

 

He won't be paying. She will. 

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13 minutes ago, fraufruit said:

 

He won't be paying. She will. 

So what? As long as the rent is being paid it's none of the landlady's business why be choses not to move in.

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@FykoBerlin: Who actually signed the lease? Both of you? Then both of you are now fully liable for the payment of the rent and deposit and e.g. the execution of cosmetic repairs. 

 

And: for example, you could not cancel the lease without your partner in the future, no matter how well or badly you get along then. 

 

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15 minutes ago, jeba said:

So what? As long as the rent is being paid it's none of the landlady's business why be choses not to move in.

 

14 minutes ago, jeba said:

So what? As long as the rent is being paid it's none of the landlady's business why be choses not to move in.

 

I'll be paying the rent, I can afford the place alone - I just worry that this is 'in her eyes' breaking the terms of the contract and is grounds for eviction. 

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