Choosing a Midwife !!

5 posts in this topic

Hello all,

I am 18 Weeks pregnant and I live in Leipzig. I need your guidance in choosing a midwife .

I have found one English speaking Midwife but she said she would visit me only in the 36th week of pregnancy so that she does not forget my face and she is not offering any birthing classes. She has but informed me that i can contact her in case of emergency or any questions. But I feel, because I have regular appointments at my Gynac , i get almost all of my doubts cleared  so i never felt the need to contact her. 

I recently also came across a German speaking midwife who works at the hospital i am choosing to deliver my baby. She infact is offering birthing classes (but in German) and some acupuncture sessions. She is ready to take my case but she was reluctant to sign a contract because she feels in case she is not able to do her job (due to sickness or something)  i should not be left out without a midwife . I really do not understand what she means by this.

 

Now i am totally confused between these two midwifes. The first one is english speaking but then i have to again look around for birthing classes somewhere else (and most of them are only in german) and the second one , though i can undersand her well ( i have B1 level of language proficiency) i am little worried because my husband doesnt no know any german and after the baby is born the whole pressure of dealing with the midwife will be on me .

Please suggest me what can be the best thing to do in this case.

Thank You in advance.

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I can give you my perspective as a father.

 

I don't really think that your husband needs to handle or deal with anything to do with the midwife, so I would not let this bother or influence your decision.

 

When my daughter was born then my German was worse than yours is now (but since improved a lot!).  My (German) wife selected a midwife and went regularly to birthing classes.

I had to go once (optional) and didn't really need to interact much, it it afterall the man's job to support their partner, so I just needed to understand and not really contribute much and as it is optional then it could be skipped (Familiarisation with the "new" terms is suggested beforehand).

 

The midwife was not present during the birth, there was never any discussion about this.

The midwife visited regularly after the birth but even when I was there, I was not really involved, other than the first time we washed our daughter together. 

 

We didn't sign any contract, just insurance details were given.

 

 

I would highly recommend attending the classes.  If anything, it builds your confidence and understanding.  It is also a great way to socialise with other mums-to-be so you really get to know people who are in exactly the same situation as you and can share experiences.  People are also much friendlier and open at such events so it is easier to make friends and build new relationships.

 

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I started searching for Hebamme from my 12th week and I was not able to find English speaking Hebamme for my summer baby (due in Aug). I found a German Hebamme and even she will be able to do home visits only after delivery that too for max 1 week. I didn't have any other choice than accepting her.

 

Later I went for the birthing class (Weekend Partner course in German) with another Hebamme. Other than few medical words like gebäremutter (uterus), wehe (contraction) etc the course was easier to understand as she was using more pictures for explaning than verbal conversations with few excersies, tips to reduce pain and to have normal delivery (all in print outs)...I can understand B1 level German and my husband A1 level and he was able to understand the main stuff...

 

As final try, I searched once again for English speaking Hebamme and I got one, who will come only after delivery. Since after care is more important for me, I wanted to have English speaking Hebamme.I have cancelled the old German speaking Hebamme...

 

After delivery and reaching home, I have to inform my new English speaking Hebamme so that she will start her visits...I had an introductory visit in her house in which I have asked few questions, she gave me few starter kits for the baby and mother (which I have not yet opened), magnesium suppliments etc etc...I gave my insurance card and she put her seal on my mutter pass...thats all...Even before delivery if I have any issues, queries I can contact / visit her without any issues.

 

The information I got is: Even if we get the same hebamme for delivery, birthing class, after support etc, we can't be 100% sure that she will be available in the hospital for our delivery (may be her shift for the day is finished / she is in vacation / she is sick etc etc)

 

Next search for Rückbildungsgymnastik already started without finding any place till now :)

 

I recommend to have bithing class as well as regeneration course

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@dj_jay_smith and @Saritha

Thank you so much for your replies.
That was exactly what I was looking for. Here in Leipzig I have no option but have a birthing class in German and I do not want to miss them either.  I have finally made my decision, I will be taking up the German speaking Hebamme . I feel the more I interact with here the better I will understand her. 
Thank you again guys you helped me finally decide on a Hebamme :)
@Saritha thank you again for the tip about  Rückbildungsgymnastik !! I will also soon start looking for it :)

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Some addition to the excellent info already given:

It is normal to go to different midwives for preparation classes, Rückbildungsgymnastik and Nachsorge. In my view, the most important one is the Nachsorgehebamme.

 

Geburtsvorbereitungskurs: usually 8 sessions, sometimes offered as a weekend crash course. Some without dads, some with dads for some sessions, some with dads. Mine had 8 participants and it was very nice to meet people in the same situations. Most were first-time mothers. A lot of info on what to expect (and that most of your expectations might turn out to be wrong anyway), some exercises etc.

 

Nachsorgehebamme: Will come to your home after you return home with the baby. In the beginning every day, if you need her. She will check that everything is ok with you (medically and mentally) and the baby (umbilical cord, weight, etc.), help you with problems, answer questions, give advise on breastfeeding, show you how to bathe the baby etc. It is very important that you feel comfortable with her and her style of doing things. Some for example are very spiritual, some very into alternative medicines, some will tell you that it is absolutely essential that you breast feed (implying that you are a bad mother if you don't, which is very helpful to someone having problems and probably feeling very guilty in the first place) etc. Some you might just not warm up to. We had a meeting with ours somewhere in the middle. This is covered by the health insurance. If you want to have a first meeting with another midwife, this is absolutely acceptable but you will have to pay it yourself and you should let them know as soon as possible if you change your mind and decide to go with someone else just because there are not enough of them and other women are desperately trying to find one. Since junior was about six weeks early, mine was on vacation when we came home. She asked a colleague of hers to come for the first two meetings. The midwife can visit you as long as your are breastfeeding and if not, for (I think) the first nine months. Ours also gave us advice on the introduction of regular food, switching to bottle after 7 months, teething etc.

 

Rückbildungskurs: Best to sign up for one as soon as you can. Your midwife can tell you when the earliest is you should start after birth. Useful but not essential.

 

 

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