German returning after decades abroad - thoughts?

55 posts in this topic

Hi all,

 

I know similar threads are up but 1) they're either out-dated or 2) they are asking for help with the move, etc. and I don't actually need help with that. I'm well informed and I already returned to Germany for 8 months in 2012, so I've been through the process and imagine not much has changed about the actual process of moving. 

I'm more curious if there are people like me out there who lived abroad for a very long time (I've lived in Canada for 20 years, since I was in elementary school. My German is still near-flawless, or so I'm told - we were "forbidden" to speak English at home so we wouldn't forget German :-)), and who are returning to Germany. I'm curious about those specifically who have moved back after the whole 2015 thing, as I know Germany went through a large shift/change again after that experience (or so I'm told by extended relatives who never left Germany). 

 

Some think I'm crazy for leaving Canada and wanting to go back to Germany... I just feel ready. I'm also frustrated by the lack of good doctors here as I deal with multiple chronic conditions, and have yet to find 1 good doctor who will actually help and take me seriously. My husband is German as well, and we've never stopped thinking about it since our failed attempt in 2012. 

Has anyone moved back recently after being gone for a very long time? Do you regret it? We are hoping to move to a small town. We want a quiet, boring life out in the country. (We're young, but we're old at heart :-P.) Just hoping to be able to have a random conversation about this, as the wheels won't stop turning in my head :-) Also, the move is still about 1.5 to 2 years away, and I'm growing impatient. I'm wrapping up my BBA before we move. 

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“the whole 2015 thing, as I know Germany went through a large shift/change again after that experience”...

 

 I must have missed that. What happened in 2015? It was business as usual here in Frankfurt.

 

Is this like The Incident in Lost?

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I think it depends where you go to. There are e. g. Bavarian rural small towns in which the 2015 refugee wave can hardly be felt anymore. Seems those refugees wer either distributed elsewhere or deliberately went to the cities.

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17 minutes ago, jeba said:

I think it depends where you go to. There are e. g. Bavarian rural small towns in which the 2015 refugee wave can hardly be felt anymore. Seems those refugees wer either distributed elsewhere or deliberately went to the cities.

 

If this is some kind of anti-immigrant thing, think carefully before moving here. Germany is a country of immigrants. Look at our surnames. This country was basically populated by refugees and immigrants after the war. It was rebuilt by immigrants. We welcome immigrants. If you move (back) you’ll be kind of immigrating. That makes you an immigrant. If you’re not OK with that, think about it.

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6 hours ago, eb said:

I'm also frustrated by the lack of good doctors here as I deal with multiple chronic conditions, and have yet to find 1 good doctor who will actually help and take me seriously.

 

For one thing, you'll need to find a rural area with easy access to a lot of medical professionals. Many small towns don't have a lot to offer. Do your homework on that.

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fraufruit hits the nail on the head. Hardly a week goes by without a big article in the press about how underserved rural areas are when it comes to medical care, because the doctors all want to live in cities (which, incidentally, is where the more advanced hospitals tend to be located). Your desire to live in a small town (probably the rural ideal you envision from stories you've heard, but which doesn't really exist any more) would seem to be incompatible with your desire for top-notch medical care. I don't know how many rural medical professionals are equipped to deal with "multiple chronic conditions", but I suspect there aren't many.

 

Also, unless you're independently wealthy, I'd be more worried about what kind of job I could get based on my qualifications than where I'd prefer to live.

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1 minute ago, El Jeffo said:

Your desire to live in a small town (probably the rural ideal you envision from stories you've heard, but which doesn't really exist any more)

 

That's true but OTOH German life is soooooo liberal you can pretty well live and let live even in the biggest towns, I imagine.

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3 minutes ago, sos-the-rope said:

 

That's true but OTOH German life is soooooo liberal you can pretty well live and let live even in the biggest towns, I imagine.

True, but those towns have those nasty people who came in 2015 and CHANGED EVERYTHING (DUN DUN DUNNNN).

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1 minute ago, El Jeffo said:

nasty people who came in 2015 and CHANGED EVERYTHING (DUN DUN DUNNNN).

 

Oh, you mean THE CHANGE! True, now left is right and day is night over here. Don't come to Germany, it's like Fury Road crossed with The Road. At least we still have roads, eh?

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We lived in Germany for about 5 years, left for under 2 years to Canada and then came back (long story).  We were here during the 2015 incident and it was not a big deal.  Being Canadian is all about being an immigrant as Canada is built on immigration.  However, some EU friends of my husband do not want to come to the Munich area because of the "incident". They are afraid of the immigrants. 

 

There is no need to be worried.  You will see people of all sizes, shapes, colours, etc on the public transit.  And I have seen much more concerning native Germans on public transport compared to those from the "incident".  But if you don't like the number of immigrants in Canada, you will not be impressed here.  The numbers are not equal but there is still a lot of shaming of immigrants.

 

Small towns will know that you are not from here.  Doesn't matter how much you try to fit in but at least you will have your German language so you might pass!  We live outside Munich close to an s-Bahn which makes getting into the city easy.  I would recommend a similar approach.

 

For doctors, we found a really good one outside of Munich.  We tried one inside Munich and it was a nightmare so it is really about finding the right one for yourself.  Our doctor is very considerate and sent me through a set of tests that in the end proved nothing was wrong but at least we know that nothing is wrong!  There was a lot of worry but the doctors were very good to us.  In Canada, it was very similar.  We had a good doctor, who worked well and investigated issues.  Got my husband on a better medication for his chronic condition which was not supported by the doctor in Munich but is supported by the other doctor....so in the end not too much better here.  You need to do your homework and not be afraid to switch doctors when you don't feel they are looking at what is best for you.  or at least what you think is best!!!

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13 minutes ago, CanadianCat said:

We were here during the 2015 incident and it was not a big deal.

 

Is this the story people get sold in Canada?! There was some kind of invasion or whatever?! The impression we get from outside of Canada is this super-tolerant, liberal country where people go to escape this kind of... racism.

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Totally agree with you.  It is not what you hear in Canada.  It is what you hear from other EU countries.  There has been all sorts of reports about the immigrants and there are some in the EU that believe this.  I would suspect that this is what was shared with the OP probably by family. 

 

Even our old neighbor who is in their late 60's was afraid of the immigrants when they came and my husband asked me if I was afraid.  I said no, don't be ridiculous!

 

I can say that the immigration in Canada has changed.  There are different nations coming and it changes how you feel in your old neighborhoods.  Not good or bad, just different.  For most people it is the fear of what they don't know.  Once you gain some understanding of each other, the fear decreases.  Unfortunately, fear also stokes a lot of fires and a lot of news stories.

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7 hours ago, sos-the-rope said:

“the whole 2015 thing, as I know Germany went through a large shift/change again after that experience”...

 

 I must have missed that. What happened in 2015? It was business as usual here in Frankfurt.

 

Is this like The Incident in Lost?

 

... literally just asking a question. Not sure why you would get your panties in a bunch (based on your other posts in this thread as well). I've been living abroad since 1999, so yes, some of my questions may appear ignorant - that's precisely why I'm on here: to get the actual facts. The news obviously only focuses on the negative, and I'm well aware of that.. that's why I don't want to get my entire image of Germany based off of the news. I've also heard negative things from relatives who have lived in Germany all their lives (as we are all German - just my family left), but I realize that their areas may have been hit harder by the negative aspects of the "Flüchtlingskrise" than other parts of Germany. So again.. I'm working with limited and biased info here, which is precisely why I started this thread. 

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7 hours ago, jeba said:

I think it depends where you go to. There are e. g. Bavarian rural small towns in which the 2015 refugee wave can hardly be felt anymore. Seems those refugees wer either distributed elsewhere or deliberately went to the cities.

 

Thank-you for the normal, mature answer lol. Good to know. 

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4 hours ago, fraufruit said:

 

For one thing, you'll need to find a rural area with easy access to a lot of medical professionals. Many small towns don't have a lot to offer. Do your homework on that.

 

I should've clarified that I don't mean rural, per se. I mean more like a small town close to a larger city. I've been a little sleep deprived thanks to a bad cold, so my wording might be a bit wonky :-) Towns are certainly much closer to each other in Germany than they are in Canada - here you can drive for hours without ever stumbling upon a single house. From living in Germany as a kid + those 8 months in 2012 as an adult, I did notice how easy it was to quickly access surrounding cities. 

But yes, doing my homework on that is definitely important. Thanks for that reminder :-) 

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7 hours ago, sos-the-rope said:

 

If this is some kind of anti-immigrant thing, think carefully before moving here. Germany is a country of immigrants. Look at our surnames. This country was basically populated by refugees and immigrants after the war. It was rebuilt by immigrants. We welcome immigrants. If you move (back) you’ll be kind of immigrating. That makes you an immigrant. If you’re not OK with that, think about it.

 

LOL wow. I'm not anti-immigrant. I've lived in Canada as an immigrant myself for 20 years, as I've stated clearly. And no, I would not be an immigrant if I returned to Germany. I'm a German by birth, from many generations of Germans. I lived in Germany for 7 years as a child as well before leaving the country with my parents. It's impossible for me to be an immigrant in Canada AND in my home country... that would leave me with 0 countries in the world where I would not be an immigrant. I'm sure almost all of us were immigrants at some point if we knew our detailed ancestry from Adam, but that's ridiculous and not at all the point of this thread. Please engage in helpful, mature conversation or find a different thread that's more the type of conversation that you are looking for. Thank-you! 

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3 hours ago, CanadianCat said:

We lived in Germany for about 5 years, left for under 2 years to Canada and then came back (long story).  We were here during the 2015 incident and it was not a big deal.  Being Canadian is all about being an immigrant as Canada is built on immigration.  However, some EU friends of my husband do not want to come to the Munich area because of the "incident". They are afraid of the immigrants. 

 

There is no need to be worried.  You will see people of all sizes, shapes, colours, etc on the public transit.  And I have seen much more concerning native Germans on public transport compared to those from the "incident".  But if you don't like the number of immigrants in Canada, you will not be impressed here.  The numbers are not equal but there is still a lot of shaming of immigrants.

 

Small towns will know that you are not from here.  Doesn't matter how much you try to fit in but at least you will have your German language so you might pass!  We live outside Munich close to an s-Bahn which makes getting into the city easy.  I would recommend a similar approach.

 

For doctors, we found a really good one outside of Munich.  We tried one inside Munich and it was a nightmare so it is really about finding the right one for yourself.  Our doctor is very considerate and sent me through a set of tests that in the end proved nothing was wrong but at least we know that nothing is wrong!  There was a lot of worry but the doctors were very good to us.  In Canada, it was very similar.  We had a good doctor, who worked well and investigated issues.  Got my husband on a better medication for his chronic condition which was not supported by the doctor in Munich but is supported by the other doctor...so in the end not too much better here.  You need to do your homework and not be afraid to switch doctors when you don't feel they are looking at what is best for you.  or at least what you think is best!!!

Thanks! That's helpful info :-) And yes, I assumed the whole migrants/refugees thing wasn't being portrayed realistically - I know the media does a lot of fear mongering, so I appreciate the info here from "real people" rather than from the highly biased media. 

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3 hours ago, sos-the-rope said:

 

Is this the story people get sold in Canada?! There was some kind of invasion or whatever?! The impression we get from outside of Canada is this super-tolerant, liberal country where people go to escape this kind of... racism.

 

How is it racist to ask a question? Imagine the media sells you this image that there's a wave of criminals - you would show 0 concern? Obviously I wasn't born yesterday, and know that the media will ALWAYS make a big deal out of something little, or portray it in a highly biased, negative light. That's why I came on here to ask a question. It's this nice little thing called "freedom of speech"... being allowed to ask questions without having someone call you names or assume things about you when they know exactly nothing about you as a person. I know that's how the internet functions now, but that's now how I am. I still believe in mature conversation with adults, where thoughts and opinions can be stated even when they are unclear, or even if, heaven forbid (sarcasm is a beautiful thing), I disagree with them. 

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In my small town we had 300 males living near us and yes I was nervous but we had them a year and they were no real problem, now they have been moved on.

 

They built a massive inflatable tube for them 500m from us. The guys (they were only male - I wondered where the women and kids were) were housed and fed well. There was only one incident in the town but that was really only one. The rest were decent.

 

Also the Portakabin which housed some of them is being closed to make way for a kinderkrippe expansion. We still have a few who have made lives here - my car werkstatt has a lad who is doing the air tyre stuff, and my Getränkemarkt has a young lad who is friendly and I like to surprise him with "Shukran" when he takes my money "Afwan" I get back. He is from Eritrea. 

 

In our small sleepy town we hardly see them like we used to. Those who are, are relaxed and okay.

 

Regards medical stuff, we have a lot of great docs, I am friends with a lot being from the wife's medical family. 

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1 hour ago, jeremytwo said:

In my small town we had 300 males living near us and yes I was nervous but we had them a year and they were no real problem, now they have been moved on.

 

It's the language that's used on this whole thread that produces a weird feeling. "Males"? So there are no "males" in the whole town now? "No real problem"? That's how 300 people are assessed? "Moved on"? Wow.

 

Did you know there are literally millions of males in Germany? Probably even in a town near you.

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