Loud child in an apartment above. And unrelated whinge about noise in general

144 posts in this topic

On 19/06/2020, 19:37:45, katheliz said:

Why is this important for us to know?

It's not! It's just a manifestation of my feelings towards her. I despise her!

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On 19/06/2020, 19:53:57, snowingagain said:

 

And the weird thing of determining the sexual orientation of a neighbour they do not know.  And again, thinking they got pregnant with advanced medical supervision.  Super crazy.  Super stupid.

Maybe, but I'm 99% sure it's true!

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On 19/06/2020, 23:26:17, BradinBayern said:

He hit on her and she blew him off, so obviously she must be lesbian, ammirite?

No, it's not that! It's the manly way of walking, talking, and carrying herself. It's the 'always pants' outfit preference. It's that I've never seen her with a man. 

It might be the wrong interpretation but I'm pretty sure it's not/

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On 14.6.2020, 10:25:10, knappy said:

 

No intention to address the problem, no intention to collaborate. 

 

That's when I realised I needed to solve the problem differently: I bought a powerful sound bar 

 

When I first read that I thought, damn, what a great solution.  Kind of surprised you're getting so much vitriol about it.  I mean, you did try to solve it the normal way, got nowhere, and so got creative.  

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On 27/06/2020, 11:10:14, silty1 said:

 

When I first read that I thought, damn, what a great solution.  Kind of surprised you're getting so much vitriol about it.  I mean, you did try to solve it the normal way, got nowhere, and so got creative.  

 

Really, are passive-aggressive letters dropped in a mail box the "normal way"? OP seems to view himself, quite laughably, as the 'reasonable' affronted one when it's clear he's a spiteful little asshole. It's not hard to imagine the tone he took with his neighbour. Of course he got nowhere, that would take actual social skills.

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19 minutes ago, alderhill said:

Really, are passive-aggressive letters dropped in a mail box the "normal way"? OP seems to view himself, quite laughably, as the 'reasonable' affronted one when it's clear he's a spiteful little asshole. It's not hard to imagine the tone he took with his neighbour. Of course he got nowhere, that would take actual social skills.

 

If you go back and read it you'll see it was a polite, private note.  A passive-aggressive note would have been an unsigned message stuck, say, on the front entrance for all to see.  

 

We don't know all the details of how this all played out.  I guess you've already drawn your own conclusions. 

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26 minutes ago, alderhill said:

 

Or are you just projecting your own mother's birth history with you? Is that why you're so angry?

 

Actually it takes neither thing to recognize a dipshit, dipshit. 

 

Keep digging your hole!

 

 

Really, are passive-aggressive letters dropped in a mail box the "normal way"? OP seems to view himself, quite laughably, as the 'reasonable' affronted one when it's clear he's a spiteful little asshole. It's not hard to imagine the tone he took with his neighbour. Of course he got nowhere, that would take actual social skills.

What makes you think I'm angry. You're the one using insults. I'm polite. So you are angry. Maybe because as I said, you're a single mother or the product of one. I come from a happy family.

 

You're making lots of assumptions! Why was my letter passive-aggressive ? Not wanting to go to her door at 10pm when I get home and talk about a common sense subject like: don't let your child run all over the place all day long but take it to the back garden or to the 500-meter away park, and instead sending a letter, is passive aggressive ?

 

 

Well, it was effective, I didn't hear a single thing coming from the apartment above since last November. God knows who suffers now ( hopefully he/she sees and applies my solution )

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2 hours ago, knappy said:

Are you a single mother too thinking that it's society's responsibility to understand you and even actively help you raise your child, just because you split your legs to the wrong random loser ?  Or are you a man raised by such a single mother ?

 

Single mothers splitting their legs for the wrong guy.   Nice.  

 

noisy neighbour.JPG

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10 hours ago, knappy said:

It's not! It's just a manifestation of my feelings towards her. I despise her!

Forget you!

And why are you complaining now, when you say you haven't heard anything since November?

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1 hour ago, katheliz said:

Forget you!

And why are you complaining now, when you say you haven't heard anything since November?

Not complaining, I told you my story!

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On 27/06/2020, 09:59:08, knappy said:

No, it's not that! It's the manly way of walking, talking, and carrying herself. It's the 'always pants' outfit preference. It's that I've never seen her with a man. 

It might be the wrong interpretation but I'm pretty sure it's not/

 

May the mind-your-business gods curse you with the incessant thrum of a thousand footsteps.

 

Payback for the noise I get, but nosing about in other people's business is a bit sick IMO.

 

I don't like my neighbours and I couldn't care less about anything that they do as long as they do not cause trouble. They could adopt 100 kids and I probably wouldn't even notice.

 

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On 27/06/2020, 13:09:32, alderhill said:

 

Really, are passive-aggressive letters dropped in a mail box the "normal way"? OP seems to view himself, quite laughably, as the 'reasonable' affronted one when it's clear he's a spiteful little asshole. It's not hard to imagine the tone he took with his neighbour. Of course he got nowhere, that would take actual social skills.

 

Well OP's tale is actually pretty common in Germany, but I agree he went about it the wrong way. I suppose he chose the opening-letter gambit because generally people in Germany do not do "personal and friendly" with people they do not know.

 

There is nothing wrong with fighting fire with fire IMO.

 

vHshzxi.png.470f55416b207c05ffe0e4aa8ecd

 

And to think people think that living like rats in cages is a high standard of living ...

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4 hours ago, claudeyc said:

 

May the mind-your-business gods curse you with the incessant thrum of a thousand footsteps.

 

Payback for the noise I get, but nosing about in other people's business is a bit sick IMO.

 

I don't like my neighbours and I couldn't care less about anything that they do as long as they do not cause trouble. They could adopt 100 kids and I probably wouldn't even notice.

 

I totally agree, I don't care about neighbours' choices/nature either. In my original post, I called her a lesbian in a spike of anger which was coming back as I was writing the post. Even though I'm 99.99% sure she is lesbian, it's none of my business and it shouldn't even be a topic to discuss. I've never had a problem with her before this whole baby-caused war started.

 

Anyway, to me this thread finishes now. I just wanted to tell people that having children comes with a high responsibility and, even though the law might favour the baby ( which is absolutely understandable ), parents shouldn't abuse that law and should be very considerate of third parties who have other priorities then the baby's best interest. Yes, I know it must be difficult for the parents too but my empathy can only go this far. 

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18 hours ago, knappy said:

 I called her a lesbian in a spike of anger

 

yeah, that's when people's otherwise well-hidden prejudices come to the surface.  I've known plenty of people who "only" shout out the N-word when they're angry.  

 

If the word "lesbian" is something you exclaim when you're angry, guess what, you're a homophobe.

 

/off-topic

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1 minute ago, dessa_dangerous said:

If the word "lesbian" is something you exclaim when you're angry, guess what, you're a homophobe.

Right, @dessa_dangerous.

"We all say things we don't mean when we're angry."
No, we don't. Anger exposes the truth about peoples' feelings.

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Meanwhile on another forum on another corner of the internet:

 

[translated from German to English with AppobookGoogleMindPhu.cc]

 

Hello everyone I am new to the forum. I need advice on what to do with a neighbour from hell.

 

I've lived in my apartment for several years and everything was nice and fine, until a new tenant moved below me. Long story short, he spent months intentionally harassing me through the walls, and I wonder if/how I should make a police complaint. He seems to be angry because I have a young child (almost 2 years old now) in the flat. We try to be mindful of the neighbours, but as ANY parent knows, or even just a half compassionate person who isn't an a-hole, often you can really only do so much.

 

My partner does not live with us, due to to work reasons, but we see each other when we can. I mention this because... 

 

A while back, this neighbour sent us a letter. It was "polite" but extremely passive-aggressive and full of back-handed little comments. It's really none of his business, but he seems to assume I am a single lesbian and made some rather rude off-the-mark comments about not finding a man, test-tubes, single parents, etc. 
 

I replied that he should just come talk to me, even though his letter was pretty damn rude and condescending. He never replied. After that I noticed that he would often view screaming rapey porn with volume all he way up, which I thought was both very creepy and inconsiderate. He knows there are children in the building, and even if that weird stuff IS what he polishes his pencil with, why not wear headphones? He seems to have gone out of his way to make sure everyone could hear it. All of the women and a few other families in the building have been warned about our psycho pervert neighbour, and we all try to avoid him. He was never that friendly to begin with, and I barely saw him before his vendetta started. When I talked to his next door neighbours, they also said they avoided him because they figured he was somehow unstable. He seemed to be pleasuring himself to this horrible screaming porn at all hours, even during the day, multiple times a day. Eventually I realized it was probably actually the same video or clip, which just made things weirder. Then later I realized what was really going on...

Recently a male neighbour chatted with him at the mailboxes, and knowing about his (as we now know)campaign of harassment, tried to gently broach the topic. This guy was obviously proud of himself, gloating about having "won the war" against me, explaining how he set porn and horror screaming on timed loops to play even when he wasn't there. And I mean, really, a war?? That was actually the term he used. My daughter has simply grown up a bit and doesn't make quite as much noise as before, what does he think he won? This creepy neighbour also made some comments about society having to pay me for spreading my legs, among other misogynistic and slyly gay-bashing bullshit. Then he started to lecture at my neighbour how parents need to have responsibility and not annoy other people or else! It may shock you to discover that he does not have any kids himself. Didn't see that coming huh? I think it is telling that I have also never seen a woman enter his flat, nor another person at all for that matter.

 

Now I understand noises are annoying in a shared space, but it is pretty clear that in all of this, he views it very selfishly and entirely as an affront against him. We have now several pieces of indirect evidence and witnesses that confirm a campaign of criminal harassment, but no direct proof beyond his letter. If we want to go to the police, how should we proceed? Can we make a complaint to the landlord or building management? 

 

Before you mention it, we are already part of the local Mieterverein, though I doubt they can help here. For any advice on dealing with mean and spiteful neighbours, I would be happy. 

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On 06/07/2020, 00:21:29, alderhill said:

Meanwhile on another forum on another corner of the internet:

 

[translated from German to English with AppobookGoogleMindPhu.cc]

 

Hello everyone I am new to the forum. I need advice on what to do with a neighbour from hell.

 

I've lived in my apartment for several years and everything was nice and fine, until a new tenant moved below me. Long story short, he spent months intentionally harassing me through the walls, and I wonder if/how I should make a police complaint. He seems to be angry because I have a young child (almost 2 years old now) in the flat. We try to be mindful of the neighbours, but as ANY parent knows, or even just a half compassionate person who isn't an a-hole, often you can really only do so much.

 

My partner does not live with us, due to to work reasons, but we see each other when we can. I mention this because... 

 

A while back, this neighbour sent us a letter. It was "polite" but extremely passive-aggressive and full of back-handed little comments. It's really none of his business, but he seems to assume I am a single lesbian and made some rather rude off-the-mark comments about not finding a man, test-tubes, single parents, etc. 
 

I replied that he should just come talk to me, even though his letter was pretty damn rude and condescending. He never replied. After that I noticed that he would often view screaming rapey porn with volume all he way up, which I thought was both very creepy and inconsiderate. He knows there are children in the building, and even if that weird stuff IS what he polishes his pencil with, why not wear headphones? He seems to have gone out of his way to make sure everyone could hear it. All of the women and a few other families in the building have been warned about our psycho pervert neighbour, and we all try to avoid him. He was never that friendly to begin with, and I barely saw him before his vendetta started. When I talked to his next door neighbours, they also said they avoided him because they figured he was somehow unstable. He seemed to be pleasuring himself to this horrible screaming porn at all hours, even during the day, multiple times a day. Eventually I realized it was probably actually the same video or clip, which just made things weirder. Then later I realized what was really going on...

Recently a male neighbour chatted with him at the mailboxes, and knowing about his (as we now know)campaign of harassment, tried to gently broach the topic. This guy was obviously proud of himself, gloating about having "won the war" against me, explaining how he set porn and horror screaming on timed loops to play even when he wasn't there. And I mean, really, a war?? That was actually the term he used. My daughter has simply grown up a bit and doesn't make quite as much noise as before, what does he think he won? This creepy neighbour also made some comments about society having to pay me for spreading my legs, among other misogynistic and slyly gay-bashing bullshit. Then he started to lecture at my neighbour how parents need to have responsibility and not annoy other people or else! It may shock you to discover that he does not have any kids himself. Didn't see that coming huh? I think it is telling that I have also never seen a woman enter his flat, nor another person at all for that matter.

 

Now I understand noises are annoying in a shared space, but it is pretty clear that in all of this, he views it very selfishly and entirely as an affront against him. We have now several pieces of indirect evidence and witnesses that confirm a campaign of criminal harassment, but no direct proof beyond his letter. If we want to go to the police, how should we proceed? Can we make a complaint to the landlord or building management? 

 

Before you mention it, we are already part of the local Mieterverein, though I doubt they can help here. For any advice on dealing with mean and spiteful neighbours, I would be happy. 

For a second I thought you are a lesbian feminist defending another lesbian who lacks common sense. After I checked your profile, I realised you are just a Canadian gay insulted by my "homophobic" comments. Chill and read again what I said and you will see there is nothing homophobic and everything I've said and done is perfectly reasonable. 

 

See you again here in about 8 years! Good luck living your life on this fancy forum!

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