The dumbest person I have ever met!

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..not sure if I can get my act together (if not, I am he of the Title of this thread) but who is the dumbest person you have ever met?

Have just written about an  incident in a Buenos Aires disco many moons ago when a young Argentine asked me where I was from...( in the what not to ask someone from another country thread!

:lol::lol:

 

Can´t get my 66 year old brain organised...fail...

I am probably the winner..but any other winners?

 

:rolleyes:

 

Ah, success!

 

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nice!

 

ok.  my vote goes to a guy I dated in uni.  He wasn't ENTIRELY dumb, but lord, some of the things he came up with were mind-bending.  Most of these were little tidbits I've since forgotten but two really stuck with me;

 

One time he lectured me on the importance of closing the toilet lid to prevent bats from coming into my apartment (they were clearly coming in via the old, un-sealed chimney and fireplace.  nope, he was convinced they came in through the plumbing)

 

Another time he went on a rant about how stupid it was to be worried about global warming as it would never affect people in North America.  Any melting polar ice would OF COURSE run "down" to the equator and we'd never see any rise in sea level up north.  He then went on to argue with a physics professor about the merits of his theory. She and I were both so dumbfounded we eventually just gave up as at a certain point, what can you say to that?

 

he was really hot and very charming, but dumb as a post sometimes

 

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33 minutes ago, lisa13 said:

nice!

 

ok.  my vote goes to a guy I dated in uni.  He wasn't ENTIRELY dumb, but lord, some of the things he came up with were mind-bending.  Most of these were little tidbits I've since forgotten but two really stuck with me;

 

One time he lectured me on the importance of closing the toilet lid to prevent bats from coming into my apartment (they were clearly coming in via the old, un-sealed chimney and fireplace.  nope, he was convinced they came in through the plumbing)

 

Another time he went on a rant about how stupid it was to be worried about global warming as it would never affect people in North America.  Any melting polar ice would OF COURSE run "down" to the equator and we'd never see any rise in sea level up north.  He then went on to argue with a physics professor about the merits of his theory. She and I were both so dumbfounded we eventually just gave up as at a certain point, what can you say to that?

 

he was really hot and very charming, but dumb as a post sometimes

 

 

Did he go on to hold the top job in American politics by any chance. :wacko:

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good question.  SCARY question :)

 

eta: but no resemblance to the current top gun

 

note:  I said he was hot ;)

 

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I have not met the guy but I read a story yesterday about Raphael Samuel who wants to sue his own parents for giving birth to him without his consent. Takes stupidity to a new level but doubtless will find an equally daft lawyer to argue the case!

 

The story is covered on the BBC website search Indian man to sue parents...

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I had a friend who was the most gullible person I've ever met. I have dozens of funny stories about him, but the best of all times is this one:

His first name is Miguel, but we used to call him "pato" behind his back, which means "duck" in Portuguese, which means a very gullible person. One day, he saw that one of our friends had a new phone. He asked to check it out. While doing it, he saw the call list and noticed a specific name. So he asked my friend:

- (Pato) "Who is this guy called Miguel Pato?"

- (my other friend, a bit embarrassed) "Oh, it's a guy you don't know"

- (Pato) "Funny, he has the same phone number as I do"  :D:D:D:D:D:D:D

 

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I was in the Army with a guy named Ron. He had no business being in the military let alone the infantry and was more suited to work at walmart. He was an example of what happens when you let the television raise your child and was mentally stuck in the 1980s and was obsessed with 80s culture despite being a 90s kid. 

 

One could write a book about how stupid he was but some of the things he did were note worthy. We were in Ramadi in 2006 which was the most dangerous city on earth to be patrolling. Multiple times he went on patrol with us without loading his SAW (a light machine gun). One night we were sneaking around about to go on a raid and he shot a barking dog with about ten rounds because he didnt want it to give away our position. 

 

He was eventually banned from doing infantry stuff and was told to sit in the back of the bradley and hand water to the crew if they were thirsty. When the dismounted troops returned at the end of the patrol evening he was found to have taken off all his clothes expect his underwear because it was really hot in his words. 

 

He was then banned from leaving the wire and forced to pick up trash all day with a stick that had a nail sticking out the side of it. He would wander the base with his stick and trashbag all day for the last few months of the deployment. 

 

By far the dumbest individual ive ever met. 

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Yes, sad. He was probably mentally deficient. I had a childhood friend who joined the Army and was sent to some base in Germany. I think he peeled potatoes until he was discharged. I have no idea how he got through boot camp. He is still severely mentally deficient. Never could string together a sentence and still can't. I saw him over the holidays when visiting his dad in a care home.

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At my last job I worked in catering, I was in the large dining hall and wanted something sending up from the kitchen.

I had already had a chat with a guy called Sean who was working at the other end of the dining hall.

He normally worked downstairs and for some reason had the kitchen phone on him.

So when I rang the kitchen phone, Sean answered. I told him who it was, where I was and what I wanted.

I kept talking to him as I slowly walked across the room and tapped him on the shoulder ... ... he kept talking to me. Doh!

 

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I knew a young lieutenant in Supply Corps School. He was from the middle of Kentucky or something.  He had an off-base apartment  and the XO got a call from the manager asking if he could explain to the young man that doors had to be closed and locked in the city or he'd get robbed. This kid's future job would include carrying $5 million in cash.

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Someone the other day was 'teaching' me that dogs can have two fathers, at the same time. That is, a puppy with one mother and two fathers!

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6 minutes ago, SpiderPig said:

When I was heavily on the sauce... I met the dumbest fucker most mornings... he was staring back at me when I looked in the bathroom mirror

 

Ditto. I think I am the most dumbest gullible person I have ever met, and I can laugh at myself too :P

 

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1 hour ago, SpiderPig said:

When I was heavily on the sauce... I met the dumbest fucker most mornings... he was staring back at me when I looked in the bathroom mirror

Very wise post, Spider! When we think about life and the dumbest things..when it boils down to it and , considering all those constant spontaneous decisions or even long term decisions about what to do next...it´s back to oneself.

And booze is usually a bad advisor if overdone...

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I knew a guy in the RAF. We use to do the '3 man lift' on new guys posted in, basically 2 guys argue about whether one of them can lift 3 people by the belt of the middle person (the new guy). They go through the rigmoroll, pick the new guy in the middle, have a strong guy either side of him locking legs and arms together. At the crucial moment, instead of being lifted the guy in the middle would have his belt undone, trousers pulled down with pants and then soaked in beer by everyone else. This dumb bloke fell for it Twice! How dumb is that?

Another equally dumb one asked why the tyres on the Chinooks always looked a bit flat. He was told by another that in the cold weather the Nitrogen in the tyres sinks to the bottom. He also fell for the injector seat course for helicopters. (Helicopters can't have ejector seats because the aircrew would be launched into the spinning blades above). He was an aircraft fitter.

 

We also had a guy in the 80's who went on exercise with all the cam cream and everything. One day he stripped his rifle down so far, he couldn't put it back together again and neither could anyone else. It went back to the armoury in a plastic bag. He was nicknamed N..N..N.nearly 19 by the regiment guys after the song 19 about Vietnam.

 

These are just the ones I remember.

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The kid next door, who, when his father yelled, 'Hey, stupid!' responded with 'Huh?' as if his father had called his name. :(

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A lot of idiocy on the jobsite:

 

I assigned my coworker to clean-up and chipping duty, as I was up a tree and I needed the better guy to help with the ropes, getting branches safely to the ground.  Got finished up to a point where I could take a break, came out of the tree and rounded the corner to where the guy was operating the chipper.  There he was, standing with one leg in the hopper of the running machine, supporting himself by holding on to the safety shut-off bar, and ramming a chunk of wood towards the business end of the machine with his other foot, not a few centimetres from the feed mechanism.  The whole town heard some pretty choice English swear-words that day. 

 

That same guy was helping on another tree take-down.  When you don't have enough room to drop a tree, you have to dismantle it.  I got to the point where the tip had to be taken down, so you tie it back to the tree and have your groundsperson get it down in a controlled fasion.  The big trick is, you can't just grab it, you have to feather it as it falls, for good reason.  I explained this seven times, including just before I made the final back-cut - feather it, don't just stop it!  So the tip falls, and he grabs it.  I saw this and got my spikes out of the tree and bear-hugged the stem just in time to get the rodeo ride of my life.  Again, with the English swear words that day. 

 

Another guy who couldn't get through a garden gate three times before he figured out he should turn the branches he was carrying... Another who cut his finger off with a battery-powered hedgeclipper because he tied the safety off and attempted to catch it as he stumbled off a ladder... Another who needed 16 stitches in her thigh by using a running hedgeclipper like a machete... that same girl 15 metres up a tree with a chainsaw with no helmet, safety glasses, steel lanyard, hearing protection, chainsaw pants, main rope or a chainsaw license... stupid stupid stupid. 

 

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