A permanent solution to prevent pregnancy - Berlin

72 posts in this topic

Hi,

I found a similar topic, but no proper answers, so I hope I will have more luck in this thread. 


I am 26 and I never wanted to have kids. There are several reasons, starting with the one that I simply do not really like them and feel no desire to have any. On top of that, there are environmental reasons, the fact I plan to travel and proceed with my career rather than take care of a child.


For a long time, I was taking hormonal tabs, but I decided I do not want to harm my body with hormonal anticonception any longer.
I have non-hormonal IUD for about a year now but it keeps hurting whenever I have sex and I am considering removing it.


I am interested, for a very long time already, in a permanent solution.

 

Are bilateral tubal ligation or tubal micro-inserts done anywhere in Berlin?

 

I know usually doctors are not willing to perform it to a woman without kids and under 30. However, I am sure of my decision and I am looking for a doctor that understands I am my own person and have a right to decide about my life and body.

 

Disclaimer: I am a fully grown person. I made my mind a long time ago and it never changed. When I see kids it makes me even more sure of my decision. Not everyone wants children. Not everyone finds them cute and have them on their 'must have' list. I would be super grateful if you can respect that and skip comments about how I will change my mind and that I am too young and all that crap that insinuates I am not aware of what I am doing. It will save us loads of time! :) Also, no, I will not change my mind when I find a perfect guy that wants kids, as a perfect guy for me does not want them either.


Do you know about any doctors in Berlin that are open to performing permanent anticonception in my situation?

 

Best,
Kate

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If you don't like kids, what is the point in caring for the environment? So long as it outlasts you, everything's fine, right?

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That is a fair question! I care about the environment for the animals and the planet in general. :) Not for selfish reasons of my own survival really. I feel like humans are destroying something extremely beautiful and I do not agree with that and I do all I can to help the planet and animals survive mess we are making.

And just because I do not like kids does not mean I want them all to die in the destruction caused by past generations. I actually wish for all kids to be happy and grow to be happy and caring adults. 

 

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If you are in a long-standing relationship with a like-minded man, it is much easier for him to get a snip than it is for you. I’m sure you are aware of that, however. 

 

I applaud your decision btw. Glad you realised that you don’t want children before it was too late. Much better than having children because society expects it of you rather than because you want them. 

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Cammiede, firstly, thank you for your understanding - that is refreshing! 

I am aware of vasectomy. However, I am not in a relationship where it is an option. And during the waiting time for that kind of relationship to happen, I would rather not abstain from undeniable fun that sex provides. ;)

 

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Seems perfectly possible, apparently costs 500 Euro:

 

https://www.bz-berlin.de/berlin/charlottenburg-wilmersdorf/warum-sich-conny-aus-berlin-mit-33-sterilisieren-liess

 

Germany's the great land of the singleton and the childfree.    Nobody cares much here if you are a woman who is not having sex and / or bearing children.   It's normal for women not to be seen as just childbearers.   My (male) partner's Polish and the birth rate's also tiny there as well,  I know, although you have more church pressure of course, but it's not greatly difference in my experiuence.

 

Finding a gynaecologist would be the normal start point here.    I've not explored this topic in  great detail with mine but I see no reason why simply making an appointment and asking about it would not start you off.  You can probably get it done quite fast.

 

Why not have it done back home in Poland?  Thriving health tourism in that sort of process.  Might be your best bet.

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swimmer, thanks! Although, she was 33 and even then it took 3 doctors to find one that will do it (sorry if I messed something up, my German is not best). Plus there is no doctor mentioned and I hoped for the name where I can go as my doctor does not want to do so as 'I might change my mind, every woman wants children'.

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11 minutes ago, KateNatalieB said:

Although, she was 33 and even then it took 3 doctors to find one that will do it (sorry if I messed something up, my German is not best). P

 

Right.   But if you respond to any information that indicates that what you want is probably easily accessible with "yes but..." then you won't get what you want   It may also look as if you are not serious, rather either self-regarding or trolling.  You won't be credible - so no surprise if nobody takes you seriously.  It does require a dogged and determined approach.   

 

Just find a gynaecologist like she did.  Also note that - while she said she got judged - she got what she wanted.   Probably because she just got on with it.  She will not have been saying "but I could not possibly do..." when any opportunity came up.

 

Some of those Polish providers will definitely have your money.  They don't care about your age.  

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11 minutes ago, KateNatalieB said:

 'I might change my mind.

 

To be fair, we men hear that before the snip too. It isn’t just women. If you haven’t fathered two children they assume you still want to spread the DNA around. 

 

Children are the centre of the universe and all. ;)

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swimmer, I asked a few and I did not yet that was willing to do so due to my age and fact of no kids. Thanks for the advice I should go and find a doctor that will do so. That is what I am trying to do by posting here hoping for advice. As you can see in my first post:

'Do you know about any doctors in Berlin that are open to performing permanent anticonception in my situation?'
Believe me or not, going to doctors takes loads of time and if I can go straight to the one that might listen to me is a much better option. I work two jobs and time matters to me. 

 

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3 minutes ago, Cammiede said:

 

To be fair, we men hear that before the snip too. It isn’t just women. If you haven’t fathered two children they assume you still want to spread the DNA around. 

 

Children are the centre of the universe and all. ;)

Haha really? I heard it is rather easy for guys as it is reversible.

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Kate- many women feel as you do- no interest in children and good that you are being responsible.

Most Gynae MDs will be reluctant to perform sterilisation  at your age, but  you need to consult with your gynae and ask for a referral.

 

 

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Unfortunately, I can't answer your question, but if you need a solid temporary solution first, I recommend a metal chastity belt. It perhaps doesn't look nice, but if it works, it works.

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Try calling the doctors on this list and see if you can find one:- https://www.arzt-atlas.de/arzt-suche/sterilisation-frau/berlin-14356.html

 

BTW to find that I did a google search :- for Sterilisation frau berlin this was the first hit.

 

Obviously since I'm a bloke living in Bremen I have no idea if any of them are any good, but it should get you started down the right path.

 

Good luck.

 

 

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pappanase, thanks! I will do that! I tried to research in German but I tried some weird complicated phrases, and I failed (I do not know German too much) who would of known it might be so simple :D Thank you!

 

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