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I want to quit my job, not sure what is the best way to do it

42 posts in this topic

8 minutes ago, diding said:

Thanks u lovely woman!

Well im out from probezeit so i think for me its 2 weeks frist

normally (and LEGALLY) after probezeit the notice period is 4 weeks to the 15th or end of the month.  Since you missed the deadline to get out by March 15, I can only guess you are stuck there til the 31st.

 

but only you know what's in your contract - check it!

 

if it's only 2 weeks it's very likely your doc will play along and give you another week's extension, but do confirm it with them first.

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20 minutes ago, franklan said:

My recommendation is to stay, and use the time to learn to get along with bitching co workers... You need that experience to survive a German Ausbildung...

now u making me nervous

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franklan is correct, and I suggested something similar myself:  you simply must develop skills to deal with difficult coworkers!

 

that is not a "german" thing - it's just working life.  You will - except in very rare circumstances - have plenty of jerks to deal with at work in the course of your career.  The more menial your work is, the more likely it is you'll have these problems, but I'm guessing that even NASA has it's share of jerks working there ;) 

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17 minutes ago, lisa13 said:

franklan is correct, and I suggested something similar myself:  you simply must develop skills to deal with difficult coworkers!

 

that is not a "german" thing - it's just working life.  You will - except in very rare circumstances - have plenty of jerks to deal with at work in the course of your career.  The more menial your work is, the more likely it is you'll have these problems, but I'm guessing that even NASA has it's share of jerks working there ;) 

 

How i suppose to deal with them? They are just impossible to deal with, and i would save me the time and energy to find work somewhere else !

Its not like im making a ton of money or love the job itself

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those are considerations, yes, and you are (at least right now) totally free to make your own choices and there is no fundamental need for you to stay.  But this is not the last time you'll be faced with difficult coworkers.  It's just that simple.

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Having to go through the odd obnoxious coworker has nothing to do with being bullied. Unless the OP has omitted more serious episodes, I suspect she will feel bullied very often in her working life. Quitting is not the solution to that.

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2 minutes ago, bariboy said:

Having to go through the odd obnoxious coworker has nothing to do with being bullied. Unless the OP has omitted more serious episodes, I suspect she will feel bullied very often in her working life. Quitting is not the solution to that.

So how bad the situation need to escalate until you think that i am being bullied?

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Well, years ago I left a job after only three months because of a really horrible boss. The Arbeitsamt had sent me there previously and when I left, I reported the company to them (turnover of personell was astronomically high). They were going to look into the matter as I apparently hadn't been the only one. As I had left of my own accord I wouldn't have got dole money so I went straight to a Zeitarbeit company and was hired straight away. Never looked back. I got a permanent job through them in the end. So it was the right decision. 

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1 minute ago, bramble said:

Well, years ago I left a job after only three months because of a really horrible boss. The Arbeitsamt had sent me there previously and when I left, I reported the company to them (turnover of personell was astronomically high). They were going to look into the matter as I apparently hadn't been the only one. As I had left of my own accord I wouldn't have got dole money so I went straight to a Zeitarbeit company and was hired straight away. Never looked back. I got a permanent job through them in the end. So it was the right decision. 

 

Well to be honest if i really try i would grin my teeth until the end but i feel like its not worth it

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Earlier I asked about the exact nature of the "bullying", and it does not seem to me to be bullying as such (at least, not what I'd call bullying from UK experience).

People saying they don't want to work with you isn't nice, but you haven't been fired, demoted or suffered any obvious disadvantage. 

Instead, it seems to be a p@in in the ar$e colleague and rude (but not offensively so) communication. Whilst that makes for an unpleasant work experience, it does not (from what you have said) appear to be the sort of behaviour likely to give rise to legal damages.

 

In the earlier thread you mention that you ignore the pain in the ar$e colleague...well, I'm guessing she didn't find that particularly nice of you either. Have you tried being friendly? I can imagine that if I was stuck in a minimum wage job for years, and there was another colleague who worked there even though she didn't need the money, and was using the job as a stop-gap until starting an apprenticeship, I might not be desperate to be her friend. Whether true or not, it would be easy to consider such a colleague arrogant etc.

 

As for awkward colleagues generally, it can be annoying to have to "suck it up" but that's what the vast majority of people learn to do early in their careers, simply to get along. Just remember the behaviours you don't like in others, and as you get more senior try to create a culture where those sorts of behaviours are not accepted, or at least where more open/fair communication is encouraged.  

 

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then don't stay - you don't have to

 

no one can really say if you're being bullied or not.  From what you have described there is one really unpleasant coworker to deal with.  It does not sound like you have been singled out for abuse, and being targeted for intentional abuse is usually a major component of bullying.  In this case it sounds like that coworker is a spoiled brat who gets away with being a spoiled brat.  

 

Not liking the situation and wanting to quit based on the dysfunctional environment, not finding it worth it to stay on, etc. is totally reasonable.  Getting distressed and physically ill over it is another thing entirely.  

 

If you really do feel this bad you probably should not stay as you are already "triggered", but please take the advice to develop some skills for dealing with people like this.

 

 

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3 minutes ago, dstanners said:

Earlier I asked about the exact nature of the "bullying", and it does not seem to me to be bullying as such (at least, not what I'd call bullying from UK experience).

People saying they don't want to work with you isn't nice, but you haven't been fired, demoted or suffered any obvious disadvantage. 

Instead, it seems to be a p@in in the ar$e colleague and rude (but not offensively so) communication. Whilst that makes for an unpleasant work experience, it does not (from what you have said) appear to be the sort of behaviour likely to give rise to legal damages.

 

In the earlier thread you mention that you ignore the pain in the ar$e colleague...well, I'm guessing she didn't find that particularly nice of you either. Have you tried being friendly? I can imagine that if I was stuck in a minimum wage job for years, and there was another colleague who worked there even though she didn't need the money, and was using the job as a stop-gap until starting an apprenticeship, I might not be desperate to be her friend. Whether true or not, it would be easy to consider such a colleague arrogant etc.

 

As for awkward colleagues generally, it can be annoying to have to "suck it up" but that's what the vast majority of people learn to do early in their careers, simply to get along. Just remember the behaviours you don't like in others, and as you get more senior try to create a culture where those sorts of behaviours are not accepted, or at least where more open/fair communication is encouraged.  

 

 

First of all, thanks for the reply, it brings me new perspective. Since im working in the factory , its not possible to be demoted .

But since she doesnt want to work with me, it somehow blocks my work, i ,e i couldnt execute my job during to the lack of tools etc...

Im being constant trash talked behind my back, but i walk it off, i dont feel the need to justifice myself to these people. And if i decided to work there to gap my time, I dont know how that would me me arrogant?

They are older than my parents, and trash talking behind my back remind me of my high school years lol.

Yea i understand the pain of having stuck there many years, its  a soul-damaging work for me, but maybe they enjoy doing it. If not they wouldnt be doing it for years.

 

 

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3 minutes ago, Malt-Teaser said:

Wondering if it's true that there are two sides to every story?

Well, i can only say from my perspective, i dont need to lie in a forum 

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7 minutes ago, lisa13 said:

then don't stay - you don't have to

 

no one can really say if you're being bullied or not.  From what you have described there is one really unpleasant coworker to deal with.  It does not sound like you have been singled out for abuse, and being targeted for intentional abuse is usually a major component of bullying.  In this case it sounds like that coworker is a spoiled brat who gets away with being a spoiled brat.  

 

Not liking the situation and wanting to quit based on the dysfunctional environment, not finding it worth it to stay on, etc. is totally reasonable.  Getting distressed and physically ill over it is another thing entirely.  

 

If you really do feel this bad you probably should not stay as you are already "triggered", but please take the advice to develop some skills for dealing with people like this.

 

 

What skills you think i should be developing? its a serious question, im not mocking

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"life" skills? 

 

come on.  there is no handbook for this, that's a large part of the reason that practice is necessary.  No single technique will work with every difficult person.  You got LOADS of good advice on your original thread - maybe you can review that and find some insight.

 

eta: I'm not mocking either...really :)

 

there are so many books on the topic, you could also go in that direction and use your current employment situation as a laboratory (or not - you should not if it's truly and genuinely led you to depression):

 

https://www.amazon.de/s/ref=nb_sb_noss?__mk_de_DE=ÅMÅŽÕÑ&url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=dealing+with+difficult+people

 

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Hmmm...let's see if you can answer your own question...

11 minutes ago, diding said:

I dont know how that would me me arrogant?

 

11 minutes ago, diding said:

i dont feel the need to justifice myself to these people

 

12 minutes ago, diding said:

its  a soul-damaging work for me, but maybe they enjoy doing it

 

12 minutes ago, diding said:

If not they wouldnt be doing it for years.

 

Displaying that sort of sentiment could easily make someone who was working there for many years think you were arrogant. Just by way of example, perhaps they have tried and failed to get the apprenticeship you have obtained, perhaps their partners can't support them whilst they look for alternative work? 

 

It is good for you that you have financial security, and even better that you have a new opportunity lined up.

So, leave the place you are working if it is making you ill, but take the lessons, and perhaps try to think about how your feelings about your role might impact on your future colleagues. At least you'll be starting with a clean slate.

Good luck. 

 

 

 

 

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I'm not even suggesting you're telling lies, just that maybe unconciously you've rubbed her up the wrong way.

Dstanners said it better than me above.

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20 minutes ago, dstanners said:

Hmmm...let's see if you can answer your own question...

 

 

 

 

Displaying that sort of sentiment could easily make someone who was working there for many years think you were arrogant. Just by way of example, perhaps they have tried and failed to get the apprenticeship you have obtained, perhaps their partners can't support them whilst they look for alternative work? 

 

It is good for you that you have financial security, and even better that you have a new opportunity lined up.

So, leave the place you are working if it is making you ill, but take the lessons, and perhaps try to think about how your feelings about your role might impact on your future colleagues. At least you'll be starting with a clean slate.

Good luck. 

 

 

 

 

Thanks mate, i appreaciate it

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