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Child behaviour specialists

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Hi,

 

My wife's best friend has a 2 and a half year old little girl whose behaviour has led to my wife's friend getting more and more depressed. Today, she wrote in an sms that she is at the end of her tether.

 

Does Germany have child behaviour specialists (like Jo Frost) that can observe what you are doing wrongly and give advice accordingly? 

 

Many thanks for any feedback.

(ps We are living in NRW)

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Jugendamt? 

 

My friend whose little boy was behaving strangely after the parents' divorce got some good help from them. Up here we have an Erziehungsberater service (crap Deutsch alert, I am trying to describe a service to help people with kids, not marriage counselling!) which has a wide remit and is good for many situations.

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9 minutes ago, kiplette said:

Jugendamt? 

 

My friend whose little boy was behaving strangely after the parents' divorce got some good help from them. Up here we have an Erziehungsberater service (crap Deutsch alert, I am trying to describe a service to help people with kids, not marriage counselling!) which has a wide remit and is good for many situations.

Many thanks kiplette! I think this is exactly what she needs.

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1 hour ago, kiplette said:

Jugendamt? 

 

My friend whose little boy was behaving strangely after the parents' divorce got some good help from them. Up here we have an Erziehungsberater service (crap Deutsch alert, I am trying to describe a service to help people with kids, not marriage counselling!) which has a wide remit and is good for many situations.

Good idea.  I'd also try speaking to a Kinderarzt. A Kinderarzt is likely to be able to recommend a child behavioural therapist.  My neightbour had the same problem with her toddler.  Her Kinderarzt referred her to a therapist who analyzed the child's behaviour and that of the parents. The parents needed fixing more than the child. Boundaries, rules, rewards for good behaviour etc. 

 

As many therapists have a long appointment lead time here, maybe a few different approaches might help...I know it's hard to cope with though the term "terrible twos" is very relevant. It's a learning and growing phase and most kids grow out of it naturally with patient parents. Child dietary advice is also very relevant. Lots of kids react adversely to various foods, most notably sugar.  Horrendous that so many processed foods are aimed at young kids heavily laden with sugar. Same applies to food colours etc.  

 

You mentioned Jo Frost...I remember watching her series ages ago and thought she was brilliant.  Maybe suggest that your friend buys her books and dvds...plenty of choice in Amazon.co.uk.

 

It also helps to get a child of that age as sociable as possible.  Kindergarten for my daughter was a great way for her to learn sharing, rules etc. My best friend had a daughter the same age and it helped so much for us to have each other's kid over for play dates. Great also for the parents to have a break.  

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While not making light of the situation, my daughters "terrible twos" were fucking awful. Work schedules and circumstance dictate that I was, and still am the main carer. And even at 4 and a half she is difficult. Unless you have other kids to compare it with how do you know what is normal?

She is the first for both of us and turns out she is an entirely normal kid.

I think they're all like that.

If there were no problems prior to the terrible twos, I'd be inclined to ride it out. No point fucking with their tiny minds just yet.

However she should have a word with the kindergarten. Ours was always sweetness and light around other people and kids.

Just with us she was the devil incarnate.

But by three and a wee bit, boom. Almost human again.

Good luck to your friend.

 

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