Discussion : picking up girls , is Berlin the right place ?

98 posts in this topic

37 minutes ago, franklan said:

even "chicks") is exactly that specific kind of derogatory disrespect 

 

 

 

BS. I affectionately call most of my English speaking friends. Some of them even refer to themselves as chicks. 

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I find the term "pick-up" worse than girls. The meaning may have changed but it's a perfectly horrible term!

 

I meet with some woman friends around retirement age once a year for a weekend and we do occasionally refer to ourselves as "girls" (but more frequently, "ladies"). Never as chicks, though! So it CAN work.

Depending on how old the man is, girls can be OK. Personally, I don't like chicks. Never was one!

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2 hours ago, arunadasi said:

Secondly: words DO matter, sorry. I'm no longer a girl, and even if "pick up" has come to mean dating in slang -- it has a very disrespectful tone to it. No girl likes to be "picked up", as if she has no say in the matter; 

 

Stick and stones.

And second, I'll have to disagree with you, even though I despise the term "pick up", because you can't speak for all the women in this world. Simple as that.

I knew some women who used the term "pick up" on other women. Example: "Ladies, where is Mona Lisa?" "No clue, last night she got picked up at the club by this hunk, Leonardo daVinci! Must be still in bed.".

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Well thanks for the notice and it's totally right when we talk about a total failure which is not the case here , I dont need to mention that I have been with couple women during this time , or maybe I should to avoid stupid comments , I was with some girls @ttr and in a very good relationship but sometime you realize that it's not what you want for really long term relationship . Thanks again :)

 Wait, it sounds contradictory here. You are complaining that you have trouble meeting women in Berlin but now you say you have been with some girls and in a very good relationship. Well, brother, if you can get that action in three years you aren't doing that poorly.  If you are looking for long-term/marriage then good luck. You are in the same boat as a lot of other folks. Finding a good partner is either extreme good luck or hard work or both. 

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24 minutes ago, Erdmann said:

 

I knew some women who used the term "pick up" on other women. Example: "Ladies, where is Mona Lisa?" "No clue, last night she got picked up at the club by this hunk, Leonardo daVinci! Must be still in bed.".

 

 

Sounds like a seedy entry from the Urban Dictionary.

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24 minutes ago, Erdmann said:

 

Stick and stones.

And second, I'll have to disagree with you, even though I despise the term "pick up", because you can't speak for all the women in this world. Simple as that.

I knew some women who used the term "pick up" on other women. Example: "Ladies, where is Mona Lisa?" "No clue, last night she got picked up at the club by this hunk, Leonardo daVinci! Must be still in bed.".

 

 

Again, sticks and stones: in this context "pick up" means something entirely different -- no "romance" involved.

I donÄt speak for all the women of the world.

But the term "pick up" is inherently disrespectful. It's in the words themselves, if the context is dating. (Is this an example of "mansplaining"?)

It's one-sided.

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52 minutes ago, arunadasi said:

I meet with some woman friends around retirement age once a year for a weekend and we do occasionally refer to ourselves as "girls"

 

I'm not sure if the OP is trying to pick up pensioners.  :lol:

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3 hours ago, arunadasi said:

No girl likes to be "picked up", as if she has no say in the matter; 

 

18 minutes ago, arunadasi said:

I donÄt speak for all the women of the world.

 

Contradiction detected.

 

20 minutes ago, arunadasi said:

But the term "pick up" is inherently disrespectful. It's in the words themselves, if the context is dating.

 

The context is not dating when someone uses the term "pick up". It's sex, one night stand, breaking bed etc etc.

And even if it's "disrespectful" to you, are you planning to language police? Again, you can't project your opinion as a fact.

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3 hours ago, arunadasi said:

 

 

Quote

 

27 minutes ago, arunadasi said:

 

 

Quote

 

27 minutes ago, arunadasi said:

 

 

Quotes quotes quotes...Quotes quotes quotes *Sing along*

 

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1 hour ago, Guest said:

 

BS. I affectionately call most of my English speaking friends. Some of them even refer to themselves as chicks. 

Hell, yes... Once you are befriended, things are different.

 

I mean, there are ladies/gentlemen who like it "rude" or "dirty talk" or being addressed by "animal names" once the friendship has reached a certain point and folks are "among themselves"... That doesn't mean it is wise to do so in the moment of the (potential) beginning of a friendship/relationship.

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5 hours ago, RenegadeFurther said:

It took me 2 years to get anywhere really with now my wife. 

It took me 4 plus 3 times asking to get her to the Standesamt...

 

1 hour ago, Aasemk said:

By the way , I came from Nazareth :)

Been there - long time ago (1974 I think).

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10 minutes ago, franklan said:

I mean, there are ladies who like it "rude" or "dirty talk" or being addressed by "animal names" once the friendship has reached a certain point ...

 

Go on old boy, give us a couple of examples!  

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35 minutes ago, Erdmann said:

 

 

Contradiction detected.

 

 

The context is not dating when someone uses the term "pick up". It's sex, one night stand, breaking bed etc etc.

And even if it's "disrespectful" to you, are you planning to language police? Again, you can't project your opinion as a fact.

 

If the OP wants more than a fleeting sexual relationship, he'd better not use the words pick up. It's a recommendation. I asked him to clarify what he wanted in my first post, and he did. I'm a writer, and I'm gave him a tip off: it's ambiguous.

 

That does not imply that I want to be the  language police. I was being helpful, as per his request for help. Perhaps I should have said "self-respecting women" instead of "no women"; because it's in the word: if you're picked up for a romantic interlude, you're just that, picked up. You have no choice.

 

 I think words should be used correctly. If people use them incorrectly, or in a context in which they could be misunderstood (see the official definitiion of pick up) then they have only themselves to blame when they are avoided by the very persons they are trying to attract.

 

 

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1 hour ago, arunadasi said:

Perhaps I should have said "self-respecting women" instead of "no women"; because it's in the word: if you're picked up for a romantic interlude, you're just that, picked up. You have no choice.

 

 I think words should be used correctly.

 

Quote

 

 

Of course they have only themselves to blame. I'm not going to sympathize with OP for not getting laid if he goes around asking if he can pick a girl up.

At the same time, a woman who is looking for a one night stand "picks up" a dude from a club. Do you have a problem with that usage too? I never knew the term suddenly is "gender specific". 

 

OP, a male, used it here because he wants to get laid. Do you have an insight as to how a woman would formulate that question, or did you just assume only women can be picked up?

 

If you are saying language is important, I can see that you are the one shaming women who are looking to have some fun by calling them "women with no self respect".

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Thank god the MRAs are here to mansplain the hip vocab of modern human mating rituals to arunadasi.

 

And thank god to TT for descending into yet another senseless slapfight over some poorly chosen vocabulary by a non-native speaker, while at the same implying he couldn't get laid if he had a bundle of 500-euro notes hanging out of the zipper of his jeans.

 

Don't ever change, TT.

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If you are saying language is important, I can see that you are the one shaming women who are looking to have some fun by calling them "women with no self respect".

 

 

For what it's worth: I've never used the word "shaming" in this way -- I know it's a modern expression but to me it doesn't make sense. Because shame is a noun, not a verb.

 

You can't really shame someone, unless that person feels shame. If a woman wants a one night stand, then no amount of "shaming" can make her feel shame.

 

So no, I am not "shaming" anyone. 

 

Might be nit-picking; but that's how I see it. I don't use the word this way, so don't accuse me of it.

I'm glad you clarified that the OP only wants to get laid; in that case, pick up is the right word. Good for him.

 

A woman who does not want to get laid will not respond gladly to the expression. It imples no choice in the matter.

 

 

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3 hours ago, arunadasi said:

For what it's worth: I've never used the word "shaming" in this way -- I know it's a modern expression but to me it doesn't make sense. Because shame is a noun, not a verb.

 

Yup, might be Oxford dictionary playing April fool with the world.

http://www.oxfordlearnersdictionaries.com/definition/english/shame_2

 

3 hours ago, arunadasi said:

If a woman wants a one night stand, then no amount of "shaming" can make her feel shame.

 

Huh? Why are they supposed to feel ashamed? Is it something immoral in your books?

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