Non-EU spouse's income and German spouse's Hartz IV

89 posts in this topic

35 minutes ago, LeonG said:

 

She should be careful with that.  I had a classmate at university who was depressed and on medication and she'd regularly think she was cured and go off them and then crash and burn.

 

These are also not meds that you can just quit, cold turkey either.  She'd have to wean herself off them slowly and she should discuss it with her doctor first.

 

That's what she's doing, has tried it often under supervision of her doctor, but she's too weak-willed to see it through. 

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3 hours ago, bramble said:

She takes antidepressants since then, wants to get off them now, but hasn't got the neccessary willpower. 

 

 

 

I cannot believe anyone would actually THINK such a thing, let alone post it. Do you even realise how offensive this is???

 

People who need antis are not lacking fucking willpower - they have an illness that would cripple them in their life if they didn't have some help. Even with them, life tends to be anything but a bed of roses.

 

You cannot and must not come off willy nilly either because "you want to", but only if your Doctor gives you the green light and then you need to slowlyl reduce them.

 

Seriously, I don't think I have ever been as pissed off at a post here ever:angry:

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17 minutes ago, camlough said:

Seriously, I don't think I have ever been as pissed off at a post here ever:angry:

 

Really? Sorry if I have offended you. She says herself that she is weak-willed, as with other things. Her doctor obviously thinks she should get off them. I'm supportive, have told her that if she feels tearful, it's probably just the effects of weaning and to talk to her therapist about it. I know other people who have lost patience with her over this.

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1 hour ago, bramble said:

 

Really? Sorry if I have offended you. She says herself that she is weak-willed, as with other things. Her doctor obviously thinks she should get off them. I'm supportive, have told her that if she feels tearful, it's probably just the effects of weaning and to talk to her therapist about it. I know other people who have lost patience with her over this.

 

She doesn't have to reduce drastically if she is scared of it.  If her doctor says it's ok, she can cut her doze by 10% or something and see what that does.  If that is not easily doable like say she is only taking one capsule of something per day and can't split it up, she could skip them one day a week and do that for a month and see if something bad is happening.  If not, she could try skipping them 2 days a week, spaced out like Wed, Sat for example and try that for a month etc.

 

Then again, if she's not ready to do it, it's her business.  It's not up to anybody else to make her do it or even less so to be losing their patience with her over it.

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2 hours ago, LeonG said:

 

She doesn't have to reduce drastically if she is scared of it.  If her doctor says it's ok, she can cut her doze by 10% or something and see what that does.  If that is not easily doable like say she is only taking one capsule of something per day and can't split it up, she could skip them one day a week and do that for a month and see if something bad is happening.  If not, she could try skipping them 2 days a week, spaced out like Wed, Sat for example and try that for a month etc.

 

Then again, if she's not ready to do it, it's her business.  It's not up to anybody else to make her do it or even less so to be losing their patience with her over it.

 

Leon, she has been cutting her dose by half and then a quarter and then going back to full dose again repeatedly for the 4 years I have known her. I'm not the one criticising her, instead I have continuously supported her since she got herself a dog 4 years ago. She was too afraid to go for long walks because of her vertigo problem and only went as far as the park near here, where I initially met her. A border collie needs longer walks and I offered to take her with me on my rounds with my dogs. It helped. She not only got to know the area around here, she also takes him alone on long walks now. Out of love for her dog she even goes to agility courses with him now despite her vertigo problem. She isn't really depressive anymore, which was initially brought on due to her vertigo illness. She felt useless after working for years as a geriatric nurse and tried to commit suicide. That's why she was prescribed antidepressants, which was meant for short-term. She's been taking them for about 8 years now. They seem to be the cause of her tiredness and even worse her memory lapses, which not only I have noticed but is also the cause of other problems with other people. She tells me her therapist, who prescribed them in the first place, has also recommended she gets off them. There's nothing I can do but listen to her problems patiently almost every day on our rounds. I think I'm the only one who still listens to her.

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1 hour ago, klubbnika said:

Private messages are communicated via messaging facility on this forum.

Can you start observing the rules, please?

 

@Klubbnika,

 

 

What you think is a private message is a copy and paste of a forum rule actually. Congrats. 

 

Now, let's talk more seriously with you and your very pleasant appearance on this thread after I politely left the other thread. It seems that you can't get enough of me. Let's give you more. 

 

You and I first communicated on another thread discussing Islamic terrorism, where I stated that I come from a 99% Muslim country thus a cultural Muslim but a personal atheist, and ethnically a mix of Abrahamic religions. I offered a very proper criticism of the political manipulation of Islam and the "This is not Islam" discourse (built on the contradiciton between the political and the theological),

 

After some discussions with you on your certain comments about refugee law etc - where you were comparing refugee fraud to Hartz Vier fraud and I reminded you the UN principles...

 

you two people decided that t I have a personality disorder. E

 

Here comes the fun bit.

 

Exactly in that very discussion actually, you quoted something from another person who agrees with you that I may have a disorder,.  Exactly in the same quote, she says has checked up this thread about my Hartz Vier boyfriend, believes I am here to be antagonistic and now GET THIS: she also states that it is quite suspicious (and thus significant) because I started this Hartz Vier post ON A FRIDAY!!!!

 

All very nice especially when I am being described as a person with a personality disorder:)) In the same discussion. 

 

At first I didn't get FRIDAY, what is the signficance of a FRIDAY? End of the working week, Hartz Vier, TGIF, what? When she deleted it, blink, I  GOT IT:)))))

 

Whatever this Friday is, it has so much significance that it must be deleted!!! Maybe it's a bit OTT, yeah, can be dangerous to say stuff like that about people? On a forum about Islamic terrorism, the holy day of Muslims, when they start their jihadist fuck. 

 

You could call me paranoid if the comment was not edited afterwards. The proof is in the pudding. Sorry. 

 

Unfortunately, it sits nicely in your quote. Sorry. 

 

Go and edit it, I have the screenshots. Sorry.

 

You are a person who can quote this shit with no worries.

 

And you know what,

 

ALL THIS 

 

After I wrote a polite message leaving that conversation, thanking you (YOU) in person, and finishing with my deepest condolences about the losses. Saying, whatever misunderstanding there may be between people in discussions, these losses were  the topic of the tread  and that was important. Sharing my wish that your children can pay safely on the streets, your elderly can walk safely on the streets. Saying that I would work for this all my life. (And I'm not even a Muslim, I'm an atheist from a family of a mix of Abrahamic religions as I said. But doesn't matter in the least. I'm very comfortable defending decent Muslim people against your hateful stuff. Will be my honour. ) 

 

These were not enough for you guys. You kept on posting about my probable disorder, with implications about my religious identity and significant Fridays. you too RedMidge joined in with a bit of stuff. 

 

I didn't respond. 

 

And here you are now Klubnikka and RedMidge, with little witticisims. Welcome.

 

Yes, this is highly personal. YOU are making it personal, following me now here, doing these.  And it!s also political. Hannah Arendt writes about this in the banality of evil. I was polishing my nails and listening to the Kinks before your honorable apearance here and am not bothered by you in the least. But I believe it is a service to humanity to act against your actions. That's why you are reading this.  

 

Now, I don't expect anything from you. Looking at it from my culture, you don't seem to respect your own dead. In my culture, no matter where we are, we don't continue insults and this and that after someone says they are leaving because it is getting too personal, states good wishes for anyone, and sticks to the topic and passes condolences for people who die in violent religious terror attacks. We drop it. This is because of respect for the dead. BUt no, you want to go on and on and on. 

 

All your actions, all saved on my computer. 

 

And then don't come here for the first time Klubnikka, writing comments not contributing to the topic. 

 

That Friday shit is serious stuff Klubbnikka. Personality disorder shit is serious stuff. You have lost your chances for small banter with me. 

 

From now on, we shall be open and you will not hit under the belt. Throw in your insults, what more can you say after all mental health attacks and quoting implications loaded with religious prejudice (all the way up to Friday!!!!!) 

 

Unfortunately the moderation link is broken on the page. 

 

Add your group negs here, that's a compliment to me. 

 

Own your stuff, be open, or just remind me that personal attacks are not allowed. That only sounds funny after all your behaviour. when I'm only stating what you are doing.

 

And it is taking so long because your terrible, terrible actions cannot be summarized in a paragraph. 

 

Yeah, I'm paranoid and mental. A Muslim who takes action on Friday. And yeah, my screenshots share my paranoia. Let authorities decide that if there is need. 

 

Cheers.  

 

You shouldn't have the face to talk to me after that. But now that you are here, come to me with your open stuff now. Passive aggression is not my game. 

 

Look at your life seriously. A mentally disordered antagonistic Muslim woman who starts Hartz Vier threads on Fridays tells you off. What can be worse than this? (Well, Marmite of course.)

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