Why are landlords so picky?

81 posts in this topic

I have to agree with Metall here and second her advice that you talk to a lawyer - this situation really doesn't sound right.  Even if you are fine with a 50-50 custody arrangement I think you should investigate your rights, especially if you actually think there is a chance your ex is going to demand support payments. 

 

At the very minimum I definitely do not see why you are the one who has to leave the apartment. Perhaps this is a way to maintain good relations with the ex, which I certainly understand and respect, but if that is the case, he needs to do his part as well.  He should be fully expected to make sacrifices himself to meet you half way (eg moving to a more affordable neighborhood).  Instead it sounds like he is somehow entitled to get what he wants/needs and you are supposed to bend over backwards to make those things possible for him.

 

That's just not reasonable.  And most importantly, in the end it does not help your kids.  You need to protect yourself under the concept of putting on your own oxygen mask first.

 

Edit:  I would be especially interested in what kind of arrangement you could find such that you have full custody, but allow him up to 50% visitation or something like this?  This would protect your limited finances and your home, and thus ensure a more stable environment for your kids.  If he wants to exercise his visitation rights then he has to get a job and an apartment that can accommodate their visits.  Simple.  And fair as this puts the onus is on him to do his part.

 

if he has been a stay at home dad by mutual agreement (not just because he doesn't have a job) for some time then obviously that casts a different light on things.  From what's been said so far it doesn't sound like that is the case.

 

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The ex is not a stay at home dad. I read he has a job, but earns very little.

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You have my sympathy, i live in cologne too and have been through the nightmare of trying to find a new place. If you even manage to get a viewing at all, often 30 people will turn up and you have to fill out some awful invasive questionnaire but you know if you don't fill it out you've got no chance. Everybody wants the flat and it's hard to get yourself to stand out. And to be honest, if you're considered low income compared to the other applicants you've got no chance.

 

That said, try looking at places in Mülheim maybe. It's not that great an area, which is probably why there are often listings on immobilienscout, but it's got good connections and isnt as bad as, say, chorweiler. Or you could try Niehl as well, abit further away and slightly cheaper than some other more central areas (though admittedly the last viewing I went to there was also oversubscribed). Look, you're just going to have to look for somewhere really small, you're not going to like this idea, but try a one-roomed apartment. I know it's not what you're used to but they tend to be relatively cheap and it's amazing how quickly you'll adapt - me and my bf lived in a 35sqm flat in Nippes for 7 years. It cost us about 350 warm, the area was awesome. I know it sounds crappy, and i wouldn't advise staying as long as we did, but the priority is finding somewhere to live at all. Then, you can take your time and look for something better. That's the reason we ended up in ours so long, we spent about two years trying to find something bigger in the area. Also, if you have something that cheap, then you can 1) relatively easily afford the rent, 2) possibly even put abit aside each month as you search for something better. I know you'd have your kids coming to stay, and I don't know their ages but I'm guessing it'd be less than ideal, but it all depends on how you use the space, ikea has fab ideas for making the most out of small spaces, and it wouldn't be forever. 

 

Also, try getting the Kölner stadtanzeiger on saturdays, they also have property listings. Perhaps you'll have better luck with someone who's advertised in there rather than on immoscout. Good luck!

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On 3.6.2016 04:01:00, Metall said:

... and then the ex has demands on YOU for support? Not if you earn less than 1,080 Euros (without a dependent child), see here for income limits for supporting others.

If you had custody of both children far more income is possible without having to support the ex!

You certainly seem to be caring and worried about others, which is a fine trait, but not at the expense of hurting yourself and your rights.

 

Also, German law is very much on the side of the mother, including that HE has to move out!! Please, please talk to a lawyer about this!

 

I know how it looks, but firstly, I'm not such a low earner as everyone here seems to think. I'd say I earn a very average salary especially considering I have no degree.

But an average salary obviously doesn't cut it in central Cologne.

 

I would not be entitled to a Wohnberechtigungsschein or Sozialwohnung. I once talked to a lawyer and she told me I most probably would have to pay him a small amount of alimony (I think she mentioned €70-100 a month).

 

And I have always earned more than him, he pays for other things (the car, kindergarten and school fees, clothes for the children, groceries). He's also a very good father.

 

The thing is, I am the one that wants out of the marriage, he wants me back. That's why I don't want to hurt him further by throwing him out of his home of the last 12 years.

 

I'm going to make an appointment with Stadt Köln Sozialberatungsstelle and see what they say. 

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50 minutes ago, BritGirl said:

 

I know how it looks, but firstly, I'm not such a low earner as everyone here seems to think. I'd say I earn a very average salary especially considering I have no degree.

But an average salary obviously doesn't cut it in central Cologne.

 

I would not be entitled to a Wohnberechtigungsschein or Sozialwohnung. I once talked to a lawyer and she told me I most probably would have to pay him a small amount of alimony (I think she mentioned €70-100 a month).

 

And I have always earned more than him, he pays for other things (the car, kindergarten and school fees, clothes for the children, groceries). He's also a very good father.

 

The thing is, I am the one that wants out of the marriage, he wants me back. That's why I don't want to hurt him further by throwing him out of his home of the last 12 years.

 

I'm going to make an appointment with Stadt Köln Sozialberatungsstelle and see what they say. 

 

Finding a good man/husband/father for your child is far more difficult than finding a good apartment...that apply to everywhere including Cologne...

 

Just saying

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On 5/29/2016, 9:21:06, Isenburg Runner said:

Yes, it is possible for you to pay a Makler to find a place.  I just received my Certification from the IHK Immobilienkaufmann and I do have the Erlaubnis §34 which allows me to find out rent and sell properties.

 

What you would need to do if you have a Makler (Real Estate Broker) search for a suitable place for you is the following:

1. Sign a document called a Suchauftrag (Search-agreement).  This allows the Agent to search for you.  In return, you promise the agent, by a successful signing of a rental agreement you will pay him/her   X amount of money.  Not to exceed to month Kaltmiete. If they ask for more then two months of cold rent they are not only ripping you off, they are likely not a broker.

2. Sign a document called the Mieterselbstauskunft. This is a document with your personal information, name, age, birthdate, employer, income, who's moving in ect. Every Landlord, Property owner or Hausverwaltung needs this to choose the right canidate.

3. In the Suchauftrag, important to specify how much you can give out maximal for rent a month, the minimum size of the apartment you want, and extras you want (balcony, kitchen ect.) This helps the broker (myself) narrow down the choices.

4. Lastly, the broker only gets paid if he successfully finds you an apartment.

 

Just because you may think you are the right canidate, doesn't mean you will get the apartment.  Its all up to the owner.  Make sure you have 3 months of rent as a security deposit (Kaution). And do not expect to sign a contract right away.  There are other things like Übergabe Protokoll ect. I hope this helps anyone.  If someone needs help. Or wants me to make them a Bewerbungsmappe for their apartment search please let me know.

 

Good luck with the apartment search.

Hi! I am trying for 2 months now to find a 2/3 rooms apartment in Stuttgart (on all websites, an around 1000 euro apartment) for me and my boyfriend, but it is really hard, even though we have a good monthly income and the proof that we always payed our rent. We should move by the end of the year or even earlier if we can find something. I also tried to find a Makler, but they want to deal only with companies, so in this moment i don't really know what else can we do. Can you, please, help us? Or do you know any Makler in Stuttgart that can help us? Thank you

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42 minutes ago, acselero said:

 for me and my boyfriend, but it is really hard

Your boyfriend or your husband? You've copy/pasted this post onto at least 3 threads today and twice he's your boyfriend, once your husband. Not that it matters, nor do I care, mainly just pointing out that copy/pasting posts onto multiple threads is not good forum etiquette.

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On 11/15/2016, 1:16:43, acselero said:

Hi! I am trying for 2 months now to find a 2/3 rooms apartment in Stuttgart (on all websites, an around 1000 euro apartment) for me and my boyfriend, but it is really hard, even though we have a good monthly income and the proof that we always payed our rent. We should move by the end of the year or even earlier if we can find something. I also tried to find a Makler, but they want to deal only with companies, so in this moment i don't really know what else can we do. Can you, please, help us? Or do you know any Makler in Stuttgart that can help us? Thank you

Like previously suggested stay away from the hip areas because it doesn't matter where you are in Germany, any major city has a big housing shortage and no Makler is going to help you with that.  Try the suburbs with good S-Bahn connections.

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On 5/25/2016, 11:20:34, jeba said:

You´d legally be allowed to not tell him that your children will be "visiting" half the week.  And he couldn´t kick you out for having your kids with you.

 

Does this really stand true? Could one of the parents just say we have no children during the apartment viewing and when approved, just casually move in with the child/children? 

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1 hour ago, thegreatdivide said:

 

Does this really stand true? Could one of the parents just say we have no children during the apartment viewing and when approved, just casually move in with the child/children? 

I never said you can lie and say you don´t have children if you have. However, you probably can. What you can do is not to mention that they will be living with you. Because marriage and family are protected by German Basic Law a landlord cannot ban you from having your children live with you.

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8 hours ago, jeba said:

I never said you can lie and say you don´t have children if you have. However, you probably can. What you can do is not to mention that they will be living with you. Because marriage and family are protected by German Basic Law a landlord cannot ban you from having your children live with you.

 

In short, if the landlord doesn’t ask about children, no need to mention it. Got it. 👍

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2 hours ago, thegreatdivide said:

 

In short, if the landlord doesn’t ask about children, no need to mention it. Got it. 👍

 

The landlord needs to know how many people (children are people) are living in the flat so that the Nebenkosten can be assessed  as some of the items are calculated per person.

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2 hours ago, thegreatdivide said:

 

In short, if the landlord doesn’t ask about children, no need to mention it. Got it. 👍

 

And one of the normal questions a landlord will ask- "Is it just you and your partner, or do you have children? And pets?"

 

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Hamburg is a nightmare trying to get a place.  We have been frustrated these past few months trying to get an apartment for our daughter, a med student.

A couple of times we were refused specifically because she was a student. 

 

Since we are paying the full cost, why should it matter to the landlord who is living there as long as she's a good tenant? Can a landlord terminate a contract if my wife, for example, lands a place for her, but doesn't say that it is actually for our daughter, and he finds out only later?

 

Like that will actually happen.  The situation looks hopeless in any case.

 

 

 

 

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You cannot rent a flat and never live there - that would lead to a fristlose Kuendigung. You can just sublet so to speak, but must inform the Landlord of course. I've actually got two younger neighbours whose Mothers rent the place but don't live there, but our Hausverwaltung knows this.

 

What you could do is to rent a flat and to live there for a few weeks in any year - but you must truly live there and not pretend to - in which case you could do a "Gebrauchsueberlassung" for your daughter.

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1 hour ago, silty1 said:

Hamburg is a nightmare trying to get a place.  We have been frustrated these past few months trying to get an apartment for our daughter, a med student.

A couple of times we were refused specifically because she was a student. 

 

Since we are paying the full cost, why should it matter to the landlord who is living there as long as she's a good tenant? Can a landlord terminate a contract if my wife, for example, lands a place for her, but doesn't say that it is actually for our daughter, and he finds out only later?

 

Like that will actually happen.  The situation looks hopeless in any case.

 

 

 

 

 

That's funny. Our first renter was a 17 yr. old student and her father signed the rental contract because he paid. We had no problems the 4 yrs. she was there.

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2 hours ago, silty1 said:

Since we are paying the full cost, why should it matter to the landlord who is living there as long as she's a good tenant? Can a landlord terminate a contract if my wife, for example, lands a place for her, but doesn't say that it is actually for our daughter, and he finds out only later?

 

Have you gone with her to these appointments and offered that you will sign the lease yourself if the landlord prefers?  I know that a son of a friend was offered that when he was trying to rent an apartment.  His parents did not go with him but the landlord suggested to him that his parents could sign the lease, otherwise he would not get the apartment.

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