Bullying or harassment in the work place

301 posts in this topic

@Keydeck, you would be suprised how many offices in Germany still use an A: Disc. Also, with regards to the PPPS-ing - where did you see any verbal diahrrea?? :)

 

@Nina, please do lend keydeck your old pc, which maybe we can use as more of a scientific experiment to see if this still works.

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Also, with regards to the PPPS-ing - where did you see any verbal diahrrea??

That would be the 3 or 4 consecutive posts which are now merged into one.

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I remember some years ago when I was new at a company and this guy Alan used to bully most the new people. He went through esch one by one. I was pissed at the thought and told him 'not to fuck with me or he'll be licking his shit off my shoes after I ram my foot knee deep up his arse', he didn't bother me again, in fact we even became friends after that...a few company changes later, he had moved back to Ottawa and we both worked for different branches of the same company...he died a few years ago from aids.

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@Pernilleo ... Hello and NO, NO, NO, NO and erm, NO ...

 

Since when did bulling ever go away by running to the teacher or the officials?

 

To stop a bully you have to make it so that its not in their favour to bully you. If everytime they bullied you, you did 10 things back to them then soon they will move on to another target. If everyone who is being bullied applies the same strategy, soon the entire office will know what the bully is doing and it wont take him/ her long to get fired anyway.

 

The rule is you NEVER snitch. But that doesnt mean that you cant have some fun and play with the bully for a while :P

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@Rimini ... You play people at their game, thats the only way to win, you just need to make sure that you are better at it than they are :P

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@Keydeck ... and since when is that verbal diahrrea?? :P I would consider it more as artistic freedom to add more thoughts to an original idea?

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@ T.O. to go ... That is excactly what I mean. You have to learn to speak the language of others, even if its not your native tongue.

The only language any bully will understand or respect is "Go away or you will have to deal with me". Anything else but that and really, youre inviting the bully to take the piss out off you.

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Except, James, that anonymous pranks don't send the bully a "don't mess with me" message. They are just that: anonymous bullying. I much prefer T.O. to go's way. That's effective, honest and not perpetuating the sadism of bullying.

 

And actually, I find NOT playing the game to be far more effective. Playing the game means you're part of the problem."You never snitch"? Really? At any time post- primary school? All you do that way is validate childish powergames, which is what bullying is all about.

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Rimini, arguments about "snitching" aside, I'm not sure James will be able to handle the concept of dealing with something like a grown-up.

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James, you and I could hang out! OK, so my faves (I'm low tech so hang on):

 

Snag credit cards and cancel them as lost through pickpocket/pursesnatching. Police will be called the first time they try to use them.

 

Use credit card numbers to find out where your bully is delinquent. Call creditor with their pertinent info (cell phone #, home #, work e-mail). Now you have a new friend and the bully is very unhappy. Better if you give the direct line of the boss as their phone number.

 

Copy all available keys for use at later date.

 

While bully is in the office, pull the caps off the tire stems and drop in a little pebble. It has to be all four tires. They will go flat slowly. Make sure you walk out with bully and say, "Wow! That's really tough."

 

E-mail them a copy of the relevant StGB from an encrypted site like hushmail. (I just did this one. The result was hysterical. I never had a guy kiss my ass so sincerely and reverently.)

 

This one only works here: make a police report that someone gave you the finger on the highway and you want them charged. The police will visit your bully.

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@Keydeck, I laugh loud because you know nothing about me :P But thank, you ...

 

@Rimini, you obviously have never dealt with a real bully or your original solution would not have been to run to the head-master :P

And somehow I have a feeling that if you were to tell a Bully to "F-off" that it would only back fire on you ;)

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Melmario, I am very open to your sadistic way of getting back at people and if you ever want to hook up for a beer in Berlin, just holla bro :)

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I agree with James, however in a perfect world, going to your boss (the adult thing to do) would be enough to make it not worth while.

 

However in real life James has a point. A lot of bosses are at a loss to deal with this as what it comes down to is, your word against the other person.

 

I had a few problems at my first job in Germany and mention it to my boss. he said he had a word with the other person but nothing changed. My other colleagues had noticed it but wouldn't do/say anything but one said that the boss was at a loss as it was really my word against the other person.

 

Even though my colleagues acknowledged what was going on, they wouldn't step in. Gutless group the lot of them.

My solution, to wind the person up by doing exactly what it seemed I did that would her up. This went on until on day she wrote an email telling me exactly what she thought.

 

What a daft bint - I forwarded that on to the boss and asked if he would deal with this or should I? he had another word and things calmed down after that. However for me the situation had basically taken away any fun form the job (now that she had dropped herself in it so to speak).

 

So I left at the end of the current contract (which to be honest I thought wouldn't be renewed - I was on contract, she worked for the company).

 

However the real fun bit was, about 4 years later I had the luck of chatting to said bint. I knew the current situation at the company, lots of work, lots of pressure, over hours unpaid/no time off etc.

 

I asked her how it was and she was all 'not so good, to much to do, 08:00 until 19:00 each day'. She then after a long winge asked me what I was doing. I said I was now working for a very large IT firm as an admin, my pay had almost doubled and the product I was using was worth far more as a career than what she was.

 

I even managed to slip in that leaving the old company was actually a good thing - which for me, in the mid-term, it was.

It isn't often this kind of chance pops up so I took it. Up yours you dumb bint! :-)

 

To the op - try to get everything in writing (I work in IT so it was easier) make sure your doctor knows you are talking to your boss about this. I am not sure if this comes under a duty of care to the employee but you never know, it might. If it does, you have a trail of written documents that you tried unsuccessfully to solve the situation.

 

Other that that, as James says, make the coffee....

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@James - the fact that you use the word "headmaster" makes me think you have never been in a work environment, either. If the boss won't help, there are still many possible ways of dealing with bullying in the workplace. Not the least of which would be confronting the bully. Reckless endangerment, destroying company property or fraud happen to be... really idiotic ideas. They really seem more like an excuse to be the bully, as opposed to stopping bullying. Only more cowardly than the original bully because - ooh, it's anonymous! It's a masturbatory power fantasy, not any kind of solution. So.. yeah.

 

Thank you for the advice, Keydeck. I guess this is the point to leave this discussion again.

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Mason, I tip my hat to the cheerful way you pwned Key and Rim. Cheerfully and politely. Magnificent!

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I think there are some slight drawbacks.

 

All of these puns could get you fired immediately.

 

Most could lead to a civil lawsuit or criminal prosecution.

 

They often don’t seem to be the perfect crime. I mean, if there are a bunch of surprised co-workers and one guy with a camera and a big grin …

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@Keydeck, I laugh loud because you know nothing about me But thank, you ...

Glad to give you a chuckle. Of course you know nothing about me either, at least nothing that relates to the real world. Perhaps we are both now laughing. Perhaps we're both the same person. Who knows?

 

 

Mason, I tip my hat to the cheerful way you pwned Key and Rim. Cheerfully and politely. Magnificent!

I suspect you and I have been reading a different thread but please, carry on.

 

Simple fact of the matter is that the "pranks" suggested by James are stupid and childish and will do nothing to resolve a real-world bullying situation. Rather they are more likely to either increase the activity of the bully or result in corporate backlash against the moron carrying them out.

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What do you do if your end-of-level boss is the bully and you get on fine with and have the respect of your colleagues, but he has final say/veto on your projects and concepts and blocks them at every turn? You can't go to the boss because he is the problem.

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Punchbear - is that bullying, though? If he's not happy with your work, but acts in a professional manner, then it's really a case of the company and you being incompatible, I think. At which point... new company?

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