Punography - Favourite Puns

54 posts in this topic

Three brothers invested in a cattle ranch, and they asked their mother to name their spread.

"Focus," she said. "Because that's where the sons raise meat."

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Well, I´m reading a book about anti-gravity right now. It´s impossible to put down.

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Two old ladies were at a football (real football!) game when a streaker ran past them.

One had a stroke, the other missed.

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Unknowingly, I walked into a gay pub and went up to the bar to take a seat and order a drink.

The guy standing at the bar asked if he could push my stool in.

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As a gay British man, he wasn't very fond of birds, but he never said no to a cockatoo.

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A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away.

 

It's Christmas time and Darth Vader and Luke Skywalker are having a light-sabre battle.

 

Darth Vader says to Luke "Luke! Luke! I know what you're getting for Christmas, Luke"

 

Luke cries "You can't know that!" and carries on fighting.

 

Darth Vader taunts Luke once again: "Luke! Luke! I know what you're getting for Christmas, Luke"

 

Luke cries out "how could you know that?"

 

Darth Vader replies "I felt your presence, Luke"

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The scarecrow was quickly promoted because he was outstanding in his field.

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