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The best way to insult Germans

125 posts in this topic

Or maybe he was trying to trace the shipment back to your address so he can come round and do nasty things to you in your sleep ?

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Not literal translations, spelling is probably a bit out too but:

Land Ei - Village idiot (soft)

Dorf bewohner - small town hick (medium)

Weich Ei - soft bastard (Hard)

Feichling - Coward (Hard)

Depp idiot (soft)

Penner - Bum (soft)

Trottel - moron (medium)

Jammerlappe - moaning bastard (soft)

Wichser - Wanker (Hard)

Idiot - obvious

Arschloch - obvious (Hard)

Schlampe - Slut/whore (Hard)

Hurre - Slut/whore (Hard)

Brutale - Savage (Hard)

 

Useful insulting descriptions Du bist/hast (wirklich)

Ordinaire! - Common/low class

kein klass! - no class

veruckt? - crazy

larm - impotent / a limp prick

ein toten Hosen -impotent / a limp prick

Leck mich (am arsch) kiss my arse (medium/hard)

 

Useful national insults

Insel Afen - Brits

Kase kopf - Dutch

Fisch kopf - Anyone from the north coast

Krauts/Bosch/Hun - Germans understand this

For austrians northern italians is a popular choice and you can use the same formula for other parts of Germany west polish etc

 

Germans love sarcasm so positive descriptions can be insults to in the right context.

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As some previous posters have already said (can't be bothered to quote, sorry), switching track confuses and annoys them - try laughing at them and saying "Sie sollten aufpassen, mit Ihrem Blutdruck könnte es gefährlich werden" (You want to watch out, could be dangerous with your blood pressure) Laughing also acts as de-escalation for you so you walk away from the encounter with a better feeling. I've found that even after 20 years here and speaking fluent German, the language tends to desert me in a confrontation, so this approach works for me. Have actually seen them get so mad that they've started hopping up and down in rage :D but they don't have a comeback (or not one I've ever heard).

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of course this approach is tailored to the granite-faced self-righteous older types. You'd need a different tack for picking fights in nightclubs and the like.

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