Must I get rid of my dog?

174 posts in this topic

 

My husband is phoning the landlord when he gets a chance, to ask for a letter confirming that dogs are allowed, since there is nothing stipulated in the rental agreement or the Hausordnung, and it was discussed with the agent.

So what do you do if you do NOT get the response you are looking for from the landlord (despite there being nothing stipulated...)?

Sounds a little like putting your head into the lion's mouth & asking him not to bite. The landlord will be primarily interested in receiving his rent - from all parties.

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He does romp around the living room with his chew toy, which could cause some noise for my neighbours, but my kids do exactly the same, and they have not complain about it in the past.

 

Last night the neighbor said I should not let my puppy sleep in the diningroom, as it is above her bedroom, and he makes a huge noise at night and keeps them up, BUT he doesn't sleep in that part of the house. Bedtime is 10pm and he sleeps in our bedroom in his basket. I have a feeling that there is going to be a lot of pettiness from her side.

The little Italian boy in the apartment upstairs from me also romps around the apartment and runs from one end to the other. When he was 2 or so, it used to sound like this: bambambambambambam. Then he went on holiday to Italy, was presumably fed copious amounts of pasta, and now sounds like this BAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAM. He also sometimes drives around on what sounds like a small plastic tractor: BRRRRBRRRBRBRBRBRB. The building has good noise insulation, the noise is only occasional and you have to expect a certain amount of noise, so I have not complained.

 

But a full-grown Bernese Mountain Dog who normally romps in the mountains romping around floor above might be different. Especially when you know that the dog has been picked out and is not the neighbour's flesh and blood.

 

I used to live on the ground floor of an Einfamilienhaus which had been converted into apartments. It looked lovely, but they had forgotten to put in proper sound insulation. You could hear the people upstairs clearly whenever they walked across the floor. They also had a piano. Whenever they played it, the choice was to wear earplugs or go out. Thankfully they didn't play it at night or romp around at night.

 

Since your neighbour lives below you, and you have no-one above you, she will know how the noise sounds like coming from upstairs in that building. Even if the dog is in another room, the reverberations might carry. It might be better not to assume from the outset that she's being petty, but also try to see things from her point of view.

 

On the other hand, she could be being petty if there is no real noise and if she's not scared of big dogs (or is unlikely to meet the dog if she is), but is just trying to pull rank over you as the new tenant.

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I have a Tango Palace living above me - no idea what they're doing up there, but there's quite a bit of stomping around - and someone with taste for appalling music loudly played two floors below. I do complain when it gets too much, or is way late, but otherwise my attitude is, it's the price I pay for living at close quarters with others.

 

However, this:

 

 

Last night the neighbor said I should not let my puppy sleep in the diningroom, as it is above her bedroom, and he makes a huge noise at night and keeps them up, BUT he doesn't sleep in that part of the house. Bedtime is 10pm and he sleeps in our bedroom in his basket.

 

sounds like pettiness to the max to me. Best to keep it friendly and as objectively as possible communicate to her that what she's hearing is a figment of her imagination.

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It might also be worth your while to go to their apartment and listen to the noise from upstairs, just to form your own opinion.

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When we first moved in, we considered the noise traveling down, because the floors creak badly. We put down thick rugs, to dampen sounds travelling. We have also been to the neighbours place to hear if the noise is unbearable, even though they did not ask us to. I feel if you respect your neighbour the respect will be returned, and to have open lines of communication is obviously very important, so if noise was the actual problem here, I am sure they would have mentioned it. I also make sure the kids don't bang around after 18h00. The puppy is usually so tired after his evening walk that he passes out anyway.

 

I had put the puppies basket on the diningroom balcony, for it to air, so I think she assumed he was sleeping there. And since we sleep on the 3rd floor she probably thought we would not know if the puppy made a noise or not at night. It definetly felt to me like she was taking a chance, because I am a very light sleeper, and the puppy hasn't woken me once.

 

I just hope that last night, she saw that I was sympathetic towards her, and that I accept she has a phobia. It was not my intention to upset her in any way, had she mentioned a phobia towards big dogs, when she played with the Yorkie, I would not have gotten the puppy. I want to make it work for both parties. I am sure there must be some sort of compromise we can come to, without us having to part ways with our 'new child', or with it getting ugly and petty. But like I said earlier she in a subtle way made it clear that there is no compromise and that her lawyer is on speed dial. So I am not very optimistic.

 

If I do not get a positive response from the landlord I am basically screwed! Either way, it boils down to what he will or will not allow. I would rather know now, than find out in a few months. At the moment I could still find puppy a home, but if he is older, it will be more difficult, because of his size, and I don't just want to drop him off at the Tierheim.

 

I guess only time will tell though...

 

P.S Bipa OMS just now she has Genophobia too :blink:

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How about asking the woman over for coffee and cake, give her an invitation from the dog and tell her that the dog has requested her acquaintance, with maybe include a little doggie biscuit wrapped with ribbon around the invitation's envelope. Tell her the dog would like to get to know her so he can be friends with her. Hopefully you have taught your dog commands like "sit" and "stay" so she can see that he is well trained (you might want to fill him up with food before her visit so he doesn't show too much interest in the coffee and cake). Your husband should be home too so you can all get acquainted and hopefully put this matter to rest. After the coffee/cake meeting, be sure to greet your neighbor cordially and say things like "Rover has been asking if you can visit again, would you like to come in a say hello?" Or send your neighbor a paw print drawn on paper with a little note from Rover saying "Woof! Woof! Greetings!"

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How twee! I love dogs in general (and particularly this type) but that would really piss me off.

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@ Reader75: I'm sure your intentions are good, but I'm with Erdinger on this one. That kind of thing would just make me aggressive and bound to hate the dog more.(*) Please keep in mind this woman has said she has a phobia, that's not healed with a bit of anthropomorphism.

 

(*) Were I so inclined, I mean. Personally I love this dog already, he's gorgeous!

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Ask her if she wants to overcome her phobia. If she does, maybe your dogs can help her to (once past the bouncy puppy stage).

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Confronting phobias can be helpful. Living below you might be cheaper than seeing a shrink. Recommend both options to her.

 

ok, Rebecca bet me to it ...

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I imagine that overcoming a serious phobia is pretty difficult and doing anything without professional help might just make it worse.

 

On the other hand, it looks like this woman is going to have to get used to seeing a big dog around the place all the time, so it makes sense to try. Particularly while the dog is still (relatively) small. Maybe the dog club will have some people with expertise in this area who would be willing to help??

 

My mum is scared of dogs but loves my labrador because she knows him. Getting to know the dog might not cure her fear of other big dogs, but might enable her not to be afraid of the dog in question.

 

From what the OP has said about the neighbours' reactions though, it sounds like they are determined to be pretty inflexible. It must be tempting to make no effort at all and just happen to take the dog for a walk every time the neighbour is entering the building :ph34r:

 

It's also possible that the phobia is a load of made up crap and that they have just decided that they don't like the idea of a giant dog living above them. Maybe they are afraid of potential noise, big poos in the garden... and have come up with this as a tactic!

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