Life without alcohol

575 posts in this topic

 

Nobody drinks for the taste of alcohol. It's the effect, happiness in a bottle etc.

Oh that is not true...otherwise, there would be no need for different beer types (Pils, Helles, Weissbier - I only like Helles and then it has to be Tegernsee or something similar).

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that's the whole point. i don't understand the complexity of a fine whiskey or whathaveyou. can't even differentiate the good wine from bad (they all taste the same to me). guess i'm just a simple girl

 

Nope, just a girl who knows what she likes! Absolutely no reason to drink (or eat) something if you don't like the taste. That's why I don't drink coffee, I don't like the taste, and no matter how often people tell me how great different coffees are, I just can't get past the bitter coffee taste. They don't understand, just like I don't understand how you can compare wine to beer to whiskey to cocktails, as they all (and among themselves) taste completely different (to me). I guess people like you who say they don't drink any alcoholic beverages because they "don't like the taste" can't get past the alcohol taste, just like I can't get past the coffee taste. Nothing wrong with that, and it certainly doesn't make you "simple." :)

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Hello people, this my first post here and it's abt alcohol lol. I was a heavy drinker when I was in the university. I drank only spirits: brandy, vodka, wiskey etc and most of the crazy things I've done was under the influence.

 

Then I met a wonderful man who told me that I was "drinking away my liver on ice" and that I had to choose either him or alcohol. I chose him and 2 yrs later, no regrets.

 

Although we broke up, he will always have my respect for helping me overcome my AA.

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So, is there a difference between addiction to alcohol, and alcoholism? I mean, if you drink beer every day, one would think that eventually you would have a physical addiction to the alcohol - but alcoholism does not really seem like that. People now call it a "disease" in it's own right, not just a simple physical addiction that stems from habitual consumption of alcohol.

 

My dad drinks beer & wine pretty much every single day. However, he has never, ever found it even a slight problem to be the designated driver, or not drink on a friday evening because I or one of my siblings wanted picking up from somewhere at 1AM or something.

He can easily go out, have 1 or 2 beers, then switch to tomato juice or something. This I find to be quite hard. Once you've had a couple, in my opinion, you invariably want another one.

 

My cousin once said to me, "there is absolutely no history of alcoholism in our family, but we are all drunks". Is there a difference? Alcoholics seem to me to always drink "hard" booze; spirits like gin or whisky and the like. I drink a whisky about once a year, but beer to me is an everyday drink. I'll happily enjoy a beer with breakfast even - I mean, let's be honest, the best bit about a weisswurstfruhstuck is the beer.

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The problem I see is that if you frequent all these bars without drinking then people will start to think that you a real boring dickhead or some kind of healthy looking poof or both.

 

My advice is to take up social activities that don’t require alcohol – who wants to hang out with a bunch of pickled brained drunks anyway.

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So, is there a difference between addiction to alcohol, and alcoholism?

I think the difference lies between the physical addiction to alcohol (alcoholism - going cold turkey is likely to lead to DTs, may need hospitalisation depending on how severe etc.) and the psychological addicition (usually called, I think, alcohol abuse). Not mutually exclusive.

 

I don't drink all that often, over the last few months have taken to going to the pub after choir every week and having one or two beers and that feels like a lot to me. Otherwise, I might only have drunk wine while out to dinner once every month or two. But on the other hand, if I am drinking wine, I have little difficulty polishing off a bottle. So I'm more of the binge drinker type than very heavy drinker type. One drink every day is supposed to be much healthier for you than lots all at once but I just can't drink alcohol every day - even one small glass of wine with dinner every day make me feel just not quite right.

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Wow, Schotte, that is a huge decision to make, good for you!

You are a strong person, and you can do this. It will take some getting used to, but being the non-drinking one isn't that bad. Good luck!

 

Thank you for these comments especially :)

 

 

So, is there a difference between addiction to alcohol, and alcoholism? I mean, if you drink beer every day, one would think that eventually you would have a physical addiction to the alcohol - but alcoholism does not really seem like that. People now call it a "disease" in it's own right, not just a simple physical addiction that stems from habitual consumption of alcohol.

 

I don't understand the distinction either and struggle coming round to these ways of thinking. They say you can be 12 and still have this "disease". If you are an alcoholic you will ALWAYS be an alcoholic, even if you don't drink there is always the potential there. It's a chemical reaction in your brain remember which is why some people go mental when they have certain drinks.

 

I can have drink in the house for months and not be bothered, I don't need one every day etc. Just when I go out I go out to get drunk a lot of times and that isn't right either. If I have a bad day I drink but this is also bad if you drink to excess. It makes you feel rubbish about yourself, brings on these low self esteem issues and all this and its a downward spiral. I used to be full of energy (still going out and getting drunk now and then) but also active in sports and good stuff and now after 3 years in an industry notorious for being heavy drinkers I've let all that go, have little or no feeling of self worth, insecure about everything, constantly don't think I'm shaping up with anything. When I sit and look at it realistically I've achieved far more than anyone I went to school with and have had a far more exciting life, I'm 6'3" and have my own flat in a prime spot. One of my friends who I spoke to recently reckoned I maybe had too much going for me. He was being serious but all I could think about was how I'd messed up here there and everywhere, I didn't feel I was going anywhere and didn't have much of a reason to get out of bed when I wasn't working. I am absolutely convinced binge drinking has brought this about, what else could it be?

 

I also used to blame the work for being on my own in foreign cities and being sick of staying in hotels on my own and wanting to go out to explore. Usually always ending up in a bar and then catching a flight the next day by the skin of my teeth. Then I started going to the pub on my own at home, not because I couldn't have found someone I wanted to go out with or anything I just liked being on my own sometimes. Some people find this concept totally alien as well.

 

 

Schotte, I think it would be very difficult to go on a rugby weekend to Dublin without getting seriously tempted....

 

Nobody has mentioned your national drink. Irn-Bru is your only hope! Whether you'd live to see your thirties would be questionable as you'd probably start to rust...

 

Why not do a complete lifestyle change? Drink, Fags and start supporting the Gers :-)

 

I know :( I've booked the flights and have a few mates I've not seen in ages though. I just don't know what to do for the best though.

 

I will never support the gers and they are currently in second place which is good :D

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Nobody drinks for the taste of alcohol. It's the effect, happiness in a bottle etc.

 

That's what I thought what I was 15, that not what I think nowadays.

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There is a forum I read where some people were talking about the 3 month point being a good one for an overall improved feeling mentally. I flew back to the Middle East yesterday and even on the flight I was a lot less jittery about everything.

 

I'm also sleeping a bit better. I monitor my sleep with a chart at the moment too.

 

The Middle East can ironically be a bad place to go dry as there is a huge alcohol problem there - think Prohibition. In fact I was one day drinking wine, beer and smoking home grown dope out there, then gave it up overnight - all of it - for 3 years. I felt much better and calmer. In the end I found a different crowd to hang out with.

 

 

Managing the habit:

Alcohol Free and/or Alsterwasser/Radler suplemented with hot green tea will keerp you on an even keel and may be a better option for detoxing rather than going striaght cold turkey.

 

I was drinking Tegernseer Leicht a lot last year in summer, and found it most agreeable in summer. I am also a binge drinker, and was actually driking lots last year of radlers and leicht beer, but with a few real ones weekend whilst watching Top Gear.

 

 

But while thinking about that just now it has occurred to me I'm meant to be going to Dublin for the Ireland v Scotland game and a traditional piss up...Don't even know if I should go any more. Going to Rome as well but at least there is plenty tourist stuff to do there. I've been to Dublin umpteen times and I'm really worried about 4 days in the company of people out to get drunk

 

Although as you say - smart thinking and regulated self-discipline...

 

It may entail reducing contact to the old pisshead crowd in reality.

 

 

He can easily go out, have 1 or 2 beers, then switch to tomato juice or something. This I find to be quite hard. Once you've had a couple, in my opinion, you invariably want another one.

 

And another...

 

 

My advice is to take up social activities that don’t require alcohol – who wants to hang out with a bunch of pickled brained drunks anyway.

 

That's in fact what I did in Saudi. Here I drink out of loneliness and stress, but it (alcohol) isn't helping.

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Fairly mortified to be in this situation totally reassessing life and while still in my late 20s.

Don't be. Stay dry and be eternally grateful THAT you are 'totally reassessing life and while still in my late 20s.' Most people with serious problems do not realise it

 

1. That early in life.

2. For themselves.

 

 

Why can't I just stop myself from getting THAT drunk?

 

I am sure you have googled enough or had enough advice to know the answer to that.

 

 

If I could walk away after 4 pints I'd be happy

That is a VERY big IF, and realistically, as I am sure you accept if you are totally honest with yourself (as you have been so incredibly open already on this thread; kudos) an unreachable goal - at least for the foreseeable future.

 

Keep strong.

 

A fellow Tic supporter.

 

P.S. Where do you row/did you used to row? I rowed for Glasgow schools, St. Aloysius, Castle Semple, Glasgow Argonauts and Tideway scullers, albeit many moons ago.

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I went alcohol free for a year. Now I have times where I have a drink or 2 and times where I don't from personal choice. I think I am healthier physically and mentally as a result. It is easier to keep my weight where I like it, and nice to know that I won't ever again wake with a hangover. I also think it actually helps in dealing with stress - you can't drown stress - it has learned to swim.

 

One of the things that really helped was the range of alcohol free beers that are easily available here in Germany. At the beginning they taste a bit strange (no alcohol for a start), but you quickly get used to them, and I find now that beer with alcohol tastes 'off', so I prefer mine alcoholfrei.

 

Not drinking is a personal thing. I don't want to get on a soapbox or bring back prohibition. The majority of my friends accept it. Sometimes there is some pressure to conform and drink alcohol and it is easier if I am just drinking a beer like everyone else, with the exception that mine is alcoholfrei.

 

In general I find it easier here in Germany. It is increasingly accepted and there are lots of good alcohol free available.

 

And I've gone through 2 Oktoberfests drinking only the alcoholfrei stuff and had a great time :-)

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Here I drink out of loneliness and stress, but it (alcohol) isn't helping.

 

I bet it is helping. But only in the very short term. Long term it's only gonna make things (much) worse.

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That's in fact what I did in Saudi. Here I drink out of loneliness and stress, but it (alcohol) isn't helping.

 

Whenever I consider having a drink since I decided to stop, I think of how anxious I know it will make me feel and that is a major drive for me. I have explained to someone about the highs (of coming home after a trip away) and the lows (going away for some weeks) and they have assured me both these will be calmer experiences the longer I stay off it and that drink increases both these feelings. I can take being less excited coming home if it means feeling less miserable going away! And yesterday I definitely felt better going away again. I'm sure I'd be absolutely up to 90 at the minute if I'd been drunk a few days ago even so I'm glad I haven't and it keeps me going. I think being drunk just makes your bad feeling (loneliness, stress whatever) all the worse even some days after.

 

 

Don't be. Stay dry and be eternally grateful THAT you are 'totally reassessing life and while still in my late 20s.' Most people with serious problems do not realise it

 

1. That early in life.

2. For themselves.

 

I didn't realise it myself sadly, took a fairly major idiotic incident :( That's a story for another day though and they do say it can take something like that I think? Waking up in a Paris hospital and losing 2 iPhones in 2011 alone wasn't enough apparently! :S

 

 

That is a VERY big IF, and realistically, as I am sure you accept if you are totally honest with yourself (as you have been so incredibly open already on this thread; kudos) an unreachable goal - at least for the foreseeable future.

 

Keep strong.

 

Yeh, I have also heard another story of someone who stopped for 10 years. Went to a wedding, had a social drink as one might. Was fine. Then the next day he was alone and had another drink and so it began again. He is now a wreck and back in alcohol counseling. I honestly worry about never allowing myself to drink again, that I might end up in all sorts of trouble again and that I can never trust myself and this guy's story seems to sum it up for me - that I never can. I find this really hard to deal with and accept.

 

 

A fellow Tic supporter.

 

P.S. Where do you row/did you used to row? I rowed for Glasgow schools, St. Aloysius, Castle Semple, Glasgow Argonauts and Tideway scullers, albeit many moons ago.

 

I was GUBC and Reading for a bit. Would love to get back into it :) Sure I kipped on the floor of Tideway scullers once when we were down for Tideway HoRR! Good times :)

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I used to be full of energy (still going out and getting drunk now and then) but also active in sports and good stuff...

 

So now you're doing it the other way round, let the going out and getting drunk go and take up the sports and good stuff again. :) But you'll definitely need something. I can identify with the 'no reason to get out of bed' feeling and it's very tough to fight but you can do it. The very first time I went for counselling I spoke about that problem and how I liked to go for long walks up the mountains but just had difficulty getting up and out on the weekends. My therapist suggested getting out of bed as soon as I woke up, heading for the bathroom (grabbing clothes that had been left out the night before on the way) and do no more than go to the toilet, brush teeth and dress and then leave the house. It really worked while I was doing it. Didn't even stop to fill a flask with water, I'd just get in the car and head up to the mountains and stop and buy water and a snack on the way.

 

If the friends you want to go and meet in Dublin are good friends, they shouldn't have a problem with you not drinking. If you don't feel like going into it in detail, just tell them you've started lent early because you overdid it at christmas and that you're saving all the money you'd otherwise spend on drink to [insert whatever wonderful thing is likely to impress here - I don't have much contact to a big rugby crowd and my knowledge would be mostly limited to what Ross O'Carroll Kelly might like so I can't make a good suggestion, I'm afraid].

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I was GUBC and Reading for a bit. Would love to get back into it Sure I kipped on the floor of Tideway scullers once when we were down for Tideway HoRR! Good times

 

Rowed HoRR with Castle Semple in 198?. Most knackered I have ever been. Give me the HoRR on the Clyde any day. But the Thames HoRR atmosphere? WOW!

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Was called off and we sank in 2007 last time I was there haha! :) Was so cold I remember trying to use my elbow to tighten my gate...Cracking night out in Putney after though :)

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I honestly worry about never allowing myself to drink again, that I might end up in all sorts of trouble again and that I can never trust myself and this guy's story seems to sum it up for me - that I never can. I find this really hard to deal with and accept

Then don't think of it that way - that's a huge, scary thought.

Why not think "I'm not having a drink today."

 

Tomorrow is another today.

So is the next day.

 

Breaking it into smaller chunks might help.

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Props to the quitting alcohol.

 

I remember when I first gave up alcohol. I was 18 at the time young, dumb, and no fun at all. Now I am 40, dirty, and no fun at all.

 

Anyway good luck dude. Remember friends don't let friends post on Toytown drunk.

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Desdemona, I'm like you. As I tell people, expensive wines are wasted on me as I can just about tell the difference between wine and vinegar.

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