What made you laugh today?

16,821 posts in this topic

Most of you won't understand this I suppose but it cracked me up.

 

Set up - girl takes her grandmother to a nude beach. The dialect sounds like North Carolina but I'm not sure.

 

here

4

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Poor old Grandma, she could have had a stroke ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... if she'd asked politely.

1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

The President of Brazil just asked:

 

https://www.thepoke.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2019/03/Screen-Shot-2019-03-06-at-13.36.14-1024x433.png

 

Should have asked the Dotard,  he'd explain it to you.  Look out Donny he's after your Clown Crown.

3

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Image may contain: meme, text that says 'SUCH ENGLISH VERY SPELL SO PRONOUNCE MUCH GRAMMAR MANY PUNCTUATE'

We all know this is gonna be used on TT soon.

1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
37 minutes ago, AlexTr said:

We all know this is gonna be used on TT soon.

So calling. Much page. Wow.

2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Because he loves his family....

 

 

Quote

 

Ever since Donald Trump was elected president and consolidated his hold over the Republican base, the consistent position of most GOP officeholders, in the face of gigabytes of debunking by fact checkers, has been: Trump never lies.

But now, faced with evidence in the form of checks written to Michael Cohen by Trump while in office — payments his former lawyer says were to silence women who alleged they had extramarital affairs with Trump — their defense has taken a new twist: If he did lie, it was only to protect the feelings of his family.

 

 

2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
19 minutes ago, fraufruit said:

Because he loves his family...

 

Of course! That's why he raw-dogged a porn star shortly after his wife gave birth to (allegedly) their son. He was just thinking of her poor vagina. He's so selfless.

4

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
27 minutes ago, fraufruit said:

If he did lie, it was only to protect the feelings of his family.

 

Reminds me of the good old days when clinton was in power.  

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
10 minutes ago, El Jeffo said:

 

Of course! That's why he raw-dogged a porn star shortly after his wife gave birth to (allegedly) their son. He was just thinking of her poor vagina. He's so selfless.

 

Melania Trump, the only woman with two vaginas.

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

He said, not understanding what a straw man is.

ETA: Ahahaha! Hooperski slid into the middle of that!

1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Humor ist wenn man trotzdem lacht (always look on the bright side of life!)...I have a dental appointment on the 18th to have three loose teeth removed...if I were a betting man, I´d wager they won´t last till then...my bloody tongue keeps hassling them.

:D:D

Bets are on:

whilst brushing/flossing my teeth...hm, high chance

whilst asleep (oh no..hope not...)

whilst eating hard cheese or a pork chop...hm, oh no, high chance...oh, shit...

some Beamte from the Finanzamt in Harburg punches me in the gob...

Win Win situation really...I will have the best built, best engineered bridge soon!

 

Jo!!

:)

 

PS: my great sadly departed friend Armenio from Colorado once wrote me a postcard to England.." Dear John, brushed my teeth today...three fell out..hope you  are well and when are you coming to visit in the US? "...

Sigh, I miss such friends more than my teeth...

 

2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I've been wanting a short hairstyle for a long time. Today I went back to the 'lady salon' where they always tell me short hair won't suit my oval face. I can't agree with them but opted for 'not another boxlike bob hairdo but not too short please.' I came out with the shorter version of Ronald McDonald's fro with a little Julie Andrews pixie going on. Help! My husband, who saw the wet hair that dried under the beanie hat flat look when I first got home said, 'Oh, you look like Lady Di now.' That's nice. But after I washed my hair, all that natural curl came in and poofed. He then said, 'Now you look more Ronald McDonald.' Oh no. I keep pulling on my hair to try and flatten it out. 

 

My inspiration for short hair was young MEN with great 1950s styled hair, that pompador wavy thing on top, that I serve coffee to. I have curly hair. I think this style would suit me well. If I knew how to style it properly. Perhaps I have enough hair left for such a hairdo? I think I must now go to a barber for what I like. Or for styling tips. But I am kind of wary of those razors. What if they really scalp me? I don't want G. I. Jane or Mylie Cyrus on that wrecking ball.  

 

Meanwhile, looking for tips for how to deal with my Ronald McAndrews do, I went to You Tube and found a humorous few tips for what NOT to do with your hair. It is geared towards men and the comments made me LAUGH at my current situation at least: 'you don't want your hair to feel like a piece of wood' or 'a girl to get her hand stuck in your hair.' Or your husband's hand to get stuck in your hair, for that matter! For anyone wondering what not to do with their short hair now it's maybe too late anyway: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FMF80EJjexo will help you at least to laugh about what you are now seeing in your mirror. 

3

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!


Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.


Sign In Now