What made you laugh today?

16,384 posts in this topic

Seems like Groundhog Day, just shut up M Organ.

 

 

HuffPost UKVerified account @HuffPostUK

McDonald's launches vegetarian Happy Meal for kids

 

Oh FFS.
It's supposed to be a HAPPY meal.

 

(INCOMING)

 

It’s all about choice Piers, our 4m customers per day come for many different reasons - from famous favourites like our Big Mac and vegan-friendly Fries to our Meals Under range. We look forward to seeing you for your usual order soon 😉

 

Owned again.

 

 

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This Facebook response to Trump's explanation why he can't accept the Dems' offer: 

"I don't want to look foolish," says the orange man with the dead cat on his head wearing a comically large wrinkled suit.

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No publicity is bad publicity rings true.   He is still there!

 

 

7DB19261-741C-4F71-A4CA-ADB0C02FFBEB.jpeg

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It's Morgan - o - Clock time again.

 

DwJmBLtWkAAZLim.jpg

 

Piers MorganVerified account @piersmorgan Jan 5

This olive tree in Puglia, my driver just informed me, is over 1400yrs old. So it’s survived over 1350yrs longer than the European Union has existed. I hope this offers the more hysterical Remoaners a little perspective...

 

And yet again he was brought crashing down by those pesky facts ...

The olive trees in Puglia are being decimated by Xylella, the EU is putting 7million euros into research and EFSA are bringing together leading experts to help beat it - this is the collaboration that we are losing with Brexit hopefully @Scientists4EU @Femi_Sorry will agree?

 

 

 

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Courtesy of The New Yorker Magazine:

 

"Catfishing” is when an online romantic interest turns out to be someone else—your classic bait and switch. Here are some more aquatic-wildlife-inspired dating terms to keep in mind when meeting someone new.

Starfishing

When your date has star quality but is really a brainless, opportunistic bottom feeder.

Anchovy-ing

When you use a date as bait to get the attention of a better date.

Octopussing

When someone is dating eight people at once.

Tilapia-ing

When a date is mild, white, and forgettable.

Seahorsing

When a date takes things so slowly that you wonder if they’re dead.

Blowfishing

1. When your date is mostly toxic.
2. When you puff up under date-induced duress.

Goldfishing

When you flush memories of a bad date down the toilet.

Eeling

When you feel an immediate spark, but it’s not mutual.

Sharking

1. When a date has jaw-dropping features.
2. When you’re missing a limb after a date.

Stingraying

When a date makes it clear that you’re getting some tail tonight.

Halibutting

When a date pairs perfectly with white wine.

Swordfishing

When there’s no hope of your date being a good kisser.

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On 7.1.2019, 14:30:49, hooperski said:

It's Morgan - o - Clock time again.

 

DwJmBLtWkAAZLim.jpg

 

Looks like Groot got a girlfriend! (Reference to the tree character Groot from 'Gaurdians of the Galaxy')

 
 

 

 

 

 

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On 1/7/2019, 2:30:49, hooperski said:

It's Morgan - o - Clock time again.

 

DwJmBLtWkAAZLim.jpg

 

Piers MorganVerified account @piersmorgan Jan 5

This olive tree in Puglia,  my driver just informed me, is over 1400yrs old. So it’s survived over 1350yrs longer than the European Union has existed. I hope this offers the more hysterical Remoaners a little perspective...

 

 

 

 

I am just like Piers Morgan: I base my political opinions on what Italian taxi drivers tell me.

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Have we learnt nothing from history?

A sneaky, lying snake oil salesman tries to trick everyone.  Lock him up!

 

 

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