What made you laugh today?

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A little boy goes to his dad and asks, 'What is Politics?'
Dad says, 'Well son, let me try to explain it this way:
I am the head of the family, so call me The Prime Minister..
Your mother is the administrator of the money, so we call her the Government
We are here to take care of your needs, so we will call you the People.
The nanny, we will consider her the Working Class.
And your baby brother, we will call him the Future.
Now think about that and see if it makes sense.'
So the little boy goes off to bed thinking about what Dad has said.
Later that night, he hears his baby brother crying, so he gets up to check on him.
He finds that the baby has severely soiled his nappy.
So the little boy goes to his parent's room and finds his mother asleep.
Not wanting to wake her, he goes to the nanny's room. Finding the door locked,
he peeks in the keyhole and sees his father in bed with the nanny..
So he gives up and goes back to bed.
The next morning, the  little boy says to his father, 'Dad, I think I understand the
concept of politics now. '
The father says, 'Good, son, tell me in your own words what you think politics is all
about.'
The little boy replies, 'The Prime Minister is screwing the Working Class while the
Government is sound asleep.The People are being ignored and the Future is in

deep shit.'

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So I popped round to see my 83 year old wheelchair-bound friend Pete today. 

" John, I saw a great film last night. It was during the time of the American Civil War and an old man sat in his wheelchair all day and everyday with hope in his heart that his grandson would, God willing , finally come to visit him after two years' absence and no news from him.

 

One day, sitting on the veranda, the old man saw a speck in the distance... the minutes went by and the speck got closer to him but still too far away to see any details.

So , adrenalin flowing , he started wheeling his way towards the speck.. the minutes went by, adrenalin flowing, sweat pouring down his face, his arms starting to hurt.

 

Then he noticed a soldier's uniform👍.

He wheeled himself closer and could see a soldier's hat! He got closer and closer, and when about three feet away , he dragged himself a little out of the wheelchair , stretched his arms out , tears in his eyes."

 

I looked at Pete. Pete suddenly grinned.

" John, it wasn't him."

 

😂😂😂

Then Pete told me it was actually a cabaret sketch he used to be the pianist for.😂

 

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And to cap it, Pete then said: " John, this is really a true story about some guys I knew in South Africa. They weren't particularly nice guys but I knew them. Three friends and the father of one of them in a wheelchair.

 

They were bored and decided to go fishing.

So they did. But they caught nothing. The father in the wheelchair was hungry and his son, who was a mining manager, was also annoyed. No fish. Nothing.

 

So the mining manager said: " right, last resort - I've got a stick of dynamite in the truck. I'm going to chuck it in the sea and blow the bloody fish out of the water."

 

So he lit the dynamite and chucked it into the water... but his dog was with them and jumped into the sea and grabbed the lit stick of dynamite and brought it back on land."

 

Me: " oh...what happened then? What about the man in the wheelchair?"

 

" Ah, John, people always ask that. Well, he actually managed to stand up and move away out of danger. John, people always forget to ask about the dog."

Me: " what happened to the dog?"

 

Pete: " He got blown to smithereens."

 

I may have weed in my shorts then!😂

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On 21/08/2021, 11:11:56, Sannerl said:

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Laugh? My own Dummheit! I saw this yesterday and didn't get the joke!😂

Belated greenie!!

 

I need time... sometimes!

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