What made you laugh today?

20,547 posts in this topic

Old but Gold:

 

"Perhaps one of the most interesting words in the English language today is the word fuck." 

 

Quote

Perhaps one of the most interesting words in the English language today is the word fuck. Out of all of the English words that begin with letter F, fuck is the only word that is referred to as the F-word. It’s the one magical word, just by its sound can describe pain, pleasure, hate and love. Fuck, as the most words in the English languages, is derived from German, the word fricken which means to strike. In English fuck fall into many grammatical categories.

It can be used as a verb, both transitive (John fucks Mary) and intransitive (Mary was fucked by John, as a noun (Mary is a fine fuck) and as an adverb (Mary is fucking well interested in John).

It can be used as a verb, both transitive (John fucks Mary) and intransitive (Mary was fucked by John, as a noun (Mary is a fine fuck) and as an adverb (Mary is fucking well interested in John).

It’s meaning is not always sexual.

It can be an adjective such as “John’s doing all the fucking work.”
As part of an adverb: “Mary talks too fucking much!”
As an adverb, enchancing an adjective: “Mary is fucking beautiful!”
As part of a word: “Abso-fucking-lutely” or “in-fucking-credible.”
And, as almost every word in a sentence: “Fuck the fucking fuckers!”

As you must realize there aren’t too many words with the versatility of fuck. As in these examples describing emotions and situations such as:

Aggression – Fuck you!
Agreement – Fucking-ay right!
Amazement – Fucking shit!
Annoyance – Don’t fuck with me.
Apathy – Who gives a fuck?
Benevolence – Don’t do me any fucking favors.
Command – Go fuck yourself!
Confusion – What the fuck?
Denial – I didn’t fucking do it.
Despair – Fucked again.
Difficulty – I don’t understand the fucking question.
Directions – Fuck off.
Disbelief – Unfuckingbelievable!
Dismay – Oh, fuck it!
Displeasure – What the fuck is going on here?
Encouragement – Keep on fucking.
Enjoyment – This is pretty fucking good!
Etiquette – Pass the fucking salt!
Fraud – I got fucked.
Greetings – How the fuck are you?
Hatred of chemistry – Thermofuckingdynamics.
Hostility – I’m going to bash your fucking face in!
Identification – Who the fuck are you?
Ignorance – How the fuck do I know?
Incompetence – He’s a fuck up.
Insight – You’re out of your fucking mind!
Laziness – He’s a fuck off.
Lost – Where the fuck are we?
Passive – Fuck me!
Perplexity – I don’t fucking know.
Philosophical – Who gives a fuck?
Pleasure – I couldn’t be any fucking happier!
Question – Are you fucking with me?
Rebellion – Fuck the world!
Request – Get the fuck out of here!
Resignation – Oh, fuck it!
Retaliation – Up your fucking ass!
Surprise: Fuck! You scared the shit out of me.
Suspicion – What the fuck are you doing?
Trouble – I’m really fucked now.
Ugliness – You’re a dumb looking fuck.
Wisdom – Fuck that shit!
Wonder – How the fuck did you do that?

It can be used in an anatomical description – He’s a fucking asshole.
It can be used in business – How did I wind up with this fucking job?
It can be maternal – Motherfucker.
It can be political – Fucking politicians.

It has also been used by many notable people
throughout history:

“What the fuck was that?” – Mayor of Hiroshima
“Where did all these fucking Indians come from?” – General Custer
“Where the fuck is all this water coming from?” – Captain of the Titanic
“That’s not a real fucking gun.” – John Lennon
“Who’s gonna fucking find out?” – Richard Nixon
“Heads are going to fucking roll.” – Anne Boleyn
“Let the fucking woman drive.” – Commander of the Challenger
“What fucking map?” – Mark Thatcher
“Any fucking idiot could understand that.” – Albert Einstein
“It does so fucking look like her!” – Picasso
“How the fuck did you work that out?” – Pythagoras
“You want what on the fucking ceiling?” – Michaelangelo
“Fuck a duck.” – Walt Disney
“Why?- Because it’s fucking there!” – Edmund Hilary
“I don’t suppose it’s gonna fucking rain?” – Joan of Arc
“Scattered fucking showers my ass.” – Noah
“I need this parade like I need a fucking hole in my head.” – John F. Kennedy

I’m sure you can think of many more examples. With all of these multipurpose applications how can anyone be offended when you use the word? So, use this unique and flexible word more often in your daily speech. It will identify the quality of your character immediately. Say it loudly and proudly: “FUCK YOU !!!”

 

7

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
2 hours ago, Janx Spirit said:

Old but Gold:

 

"Perhaps one of the most interesting words in the English language today is the word fuck." 

 

 

A greenie for you - loved it- despite your hypocrisy - "What the fuck was that?" ( the Mayor of Hiroshima.)

You were only too happy to green Jeffo's criticism of my arrow-in-the- head patient at the doc this morning, weren't you?

😂 And indirectly adding to the bullying!!!

 

I am laughing my head off!😂😂

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, fraufruit said:

Let me guess - George Carlin?

 

It's uncertain where it comes from he's done it but so has Denis Leary and (Google says) a Jack Wagner. I think even Monty Python did a stage version...

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
An 8-year-old girl went to her grandfather, who was working in the yard and asked him, "Grampa, what is couple sex?"
 
The grandfather was surprised that she would ask such a question, but decided that if she's old enough to ask the question, then she's old enough to get a straight answer. Steeling himself to leave nothing out, he proceeded to tell her all about human reproduction and the joys and responsibilities of intercourse.
 
When he finished explaining, the little girl was looking at him with her mouth hanging open, eyes wide in amazement. Seeing the look on her face, the grandfather asked her, "Why did you ask this question, honey?"
 
The little girl replied, "Grandma says that dinner will be ready in just a couple secs."
6

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

A Dutch Lamborghini driver noticed a car on the motorway with high speed and decided to follow it in the slipstream. No difficulty there. A little later he lost his driving license, because he drove 60 km/h too fast. He followed a discreet police car 👻.

1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!


Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.


Sign In Now