Worst jokes ever

4,866 posts in this topic

There are no interesting posts on tt today and work is equally as stimulating. To fill the void I suggest we post the worst jokes we have had the misfortune of being subjected to. Any takers?

3

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

From a penguin bar wrapper:

 

Q: What do Penguins sing on a birthday?

 

a: Freeze a jolly good fellow...

2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

A man walks into a chemist.

'Can I have a bar of soap please.'

'Which colour, we have red, green or pink.'

'Doesn't really matter, I've got my bike outside.'

3

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Q. What is red and makes sounds like fffzzzist ffzzist ffzzzist ffzzzist?

 

A. A baby playing with a razor blade.

1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Why did the bubblegum cross the road.

 

Coz it was stuck to the chicken's foot.

 

Knock knock

Who's there

Dr

Dr Who

You just said it!

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My redneck cousin slammed the car door shut with the keys in the ignition.

It took him two days to get his family out of the car.

5

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Paulson..and Bernanke was a rolling stone.

Whereever they laid their hat was their home.

And when they regulated the markets.

All they left the average investors was... *alone...

 

*sing to the tune of papa was a rolling stone*

 

*alone to pay 600 dollars each for the bailout

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Two nuns were driving through Transylvania when a vampire flew down and landed on the car. One nun turned to the other and urged "show him your cross". The nun promptly leaned out the window and yelled "Oi! Fu*k off!"

 

It was in the newspaper this morning

1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

A Grizzly bear walks into a Bar , "a beer please "

"no chance" said the Barman you do Drugs i'm not serving you ,

"no I don't "insisted the Grizzly

anyway in the end he got his beer ,ended up getting totally mortal .then he got hungry ,

there was two old slappers sitting at the bar, the bear swiped out with his claws and cut one of them into about 5 pieces and proceeded to eat her!

The next night he walked into the bar, "a beer please"

"not a chance" said the Barman "you lied to me last night about not doing drugs"

" I don't do drugs "

"what about that BAR BITCH YOU ATE last night" :unsure:

1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!


Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.


Sign In Now