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inNRW posted a topic in Life in NRWHi, I am an Irish girl working/living in Germany and would like to ask about this situation that a German guy who is in a relationship but shows interest in another girl (me) and expect to be 'chased' by the other girl. It’s the second time it happened to me now. The first one was one of my colleagues, he and his 'long-term' girlfriend was doing long distance at that time. He chatted with me regularly, showing extra attention and being extra 'helpful'. When I thought he was interested he mentioned that he was going on a vacation with his girlfriend. In where I grew up, when a guy mentions his girlfriend, he suggests that he is not interested, at least not in a romantic way. So I dropped that thought and treated him as a normal colleague. But once in a while, he would say something that makes me feel unease, like "do you trust me?" "I'll give you anything as long as you ask", "you wanna hang out?" and if I occasionally mentioned his girlfriend, he dimmed his face, seemed 'disappointed'. This went on for over a year and another guy showed up, who is single and seem attractive. I chatted with the new guy and he went mad, refused to talk to me. When I confronted him, he accused me for 'not chasing' him. He almost cried out saying "I trusted you!" and said many hurtful words as if I hurt him. I said, "but you have a girlfriend." He then said something that, I should chase him anyway and once we sleep together we automatically become boyfriend and girlfriend. At that point, I had completely lost interest because of his hurtful words. I moved on. He and his girlfriend moved in together. Later he came around me throwing hints again I rejected all of them. Then there came a second ‘in-a-relationship' guy, slightly different situation. We met in some sports activity, it was almost an instant attraction and he gave much of attention to an almost awkward level. I was attracted to him too and started meeting (at the activity) once in a while for a couple of months. Then I found out that he has a girlfriend for 6-7 years. I was very disappointed to be in the same situation again and I immediately ‘cut it off’ and shifted my attention completely towards my other teammates. And I didn’t attend the sport for a few weeks. He noticed my withdrawal. He made an effort to be in the same group with me the next time I showed up — we worked well together and I felt the attraction was still there. Now I don’t know what to do. I need advice on how to handle this situation. Is the effort he made to be in the same group with me a gesture of showing interest or just trying to be friendly after his relationship status was ‘revealed’. Should I ‘chase’ him as the first guy suggested? And, I noticed that German guys only throw out ‘hints’ but never do any chasing. What do you guys expect a girl to do the ‘chasing'? It just feels so awkward if I just walk up to him and ask him out — especially with that awkward face and a girlfriend staring from behind! Help!