El Jeffo

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27,837 Awesome with awesome sauce

About El Jeffo

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    Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit sniffing glue

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Profile Information

  • Location Berlin
  • Nationality American
  • Hometown Bakersfield born and raised, yessir
  • Gender Male
  • Interests Blowing bubbles at and hugging refugees, in that order - apparently.

Recent Profile Visitors

123,260 profile views
  1. Because Trump has done so many horrible things that we inevitably forget some of them, here's a list of 112 horrible things (cruelties, collusion, corruption, and crimes) he did between February 2011 and February 2017.   First in a series.
  2. Bundesliga - Does anybody really care?

    HA! And after all the rumors and gossip, the big SURPRISE press conference turned out to be Trumpian bullshit: Rummenigge and Hoeneß lambasted the press for reporting on how shitty Bayern is doing, even going so far as to quote Article 1 of the German constitution ("human dignity is inviolable").   Rummenigge whined "We're not going to accept it any longer." Moaning further, he said they "won't put up with the degrading reporting any more" and spoke of imaginary "disrespectful comments" and "fake facts". They say they've already taken legal steps to stop the media pounding and will continue to do so.   Fucking wankers. That's not how you make friends or win championships.
  3. Bundesliga - Does anybody really care?

    That's the literal translation of "Feuerteufel", yes. The legal term is "Arsonist".
  4. Bundesliga - Does anybody really care?

    I guess we can put this Hoeneß statement on the same shelf as "I'm an honest taxpayer".   For the non-German speakers: ULLI (Hoeneß): Tax fraud KALLE (Rummenigge): Smuggling luxury goods FRANZL (Beckenbauer): Adultry BRENO: Firebug FRANKY (Ribery): Sex with minors   We're the champions... in breaking laws
  5. Cheddar cheese from Lidl and elsewhere

      Not your panic buying, but general Brexit panic: Irish cheesemaker stockpiling cheddar in case of no-deal Brexit
  6. I keep reading the topic title and thinking, "why leave your homework undone for so long?"
  7. Bundesliga - Does anybody really care?

    It would certainly be unprecedented.   Personally, I think the Germans would see it as an act of resignation if a foreigner were appointed head coach. Germans are supposed other countries' teams, not the other way around. It iz ze order of zhings.
  8. That's a pretty bad suggestion, for a couple of reasons: 1. If he's getting paid for the line management duties, but doesn't have them, hey, free money. 2. If he's planning on leaving, lining up a new job first will avoid problems down the line. You're always in a stronger negotiating position when you're not unemployed. 3. If unemployment is inevitable, it's better to get dismissed than to quit from a benefits perspective. Otherwise there's a 3-month block on unemployment benefits.    
  9. Crawl back into your booze bottle, j². You're obviously exhausted.
  10. Disdain and rejection. Just like the sheep that mauled you after it rejected your advances.
  11. Brexit: The fallout

    It's all part of the Brexit contingency plans for dealing with shortages, @dom: Drive out all the foreigners, who would otherwise eat all the home-grown parsnips and pick the best bits of trash from the rubbish tips. Who cares if they make up half the nurses and elderly care staff? If more of those old codgers kick the bucket, it's more parsnips and recyclables for the rest.   Simples.
  12. If you want to be my buddy for some strange reason (I know why j² does, because he doesn't have any human friends), there are just three rules: 1. Have a sense of humor 2. Don't be a dick 3. Don't be a bigot so bad luck for you, I'm afraid you fail on all three counts.   I cross my heart and pinky-swear that you'll be the first to know as soon as Quatsch holds their Boring Wanker Open Night - I put a note to that effect in their suggestion box the last time I visited, so fingers crossed that you'll get an outlet for your "creativity" soon.   Anyhoo, this has been real, it's been fun, but it hasn't been real fun, so please run off and go back to tormenting refugees or whatever it is you regularly do, when you're not moaning about Brexit or refugees or a hundred other things. Sorry to be so harsh, but you insist that I'm a comedian and you insist on heckling me, so you get the treatment that (bad) hecklers get.
  13. Nice try, buddy, but don't quit your day job just yet.
  14. AOK high premium need advice

    It isn't just the premium you'll be paying right now that you have to worry about; it's also premium stability. Many private health insurance companies are notorious for offering low starter rates, then jacking up the prices 10-20% per year under the pretense of increased costs among the insurance pool members (because the pools they create are artificially small, to enable them to offer the low rates in the first place). I experienced that personally until I switched to a more reasonable company.   Personally, I'd recommend a co-op like the Landeskrankenhilfe. My rates have remained stable (meaning 1% or less inflation per year) on average for the last 20 years, because they don't have shareholders or parent companies extracting the profits.
  15. AOK high premium need advice

    If you're no longer working as an artist, you can withdraw your application. Just give them a call and/or send them an e-mail.   I'd still be wary of going private - especially on the advice of a private insurance broker.