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About confu

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  • Location USA
  • Nationality Canadian
  1. Obligatory update, I guess: He isn't interested, but surprisingly, I feel more relieved than anything  Thanks again everyone!
  2. Most people would be turned off if you came across to them as desperately as you do in these posts, not only women and not only in Germany. Speaking as a woman in my 20s, very few people I know are actively looking for serious relationships, but most would commit if the right person came along. Since you're in your 30s, why not look for a woman around your own age?   That said, the "right person" looks and acts very differently for each person. It's not a matter of being a "nice guy." You should be compelling and live a full life. The blog you're citing from 2013 also does not reflect the post-#MeToo ethos: women are not turned off by respect. Being confident is not the same as being obnoxious, and there is a large grey area between being obnoxious and being a doormat.   To start, it makes sense to try to build a more three-dimensional life so you become less desperate. Some things you can do to actively make yourself more attractive to the opposite sex, while taking your mind off of dating, include: Developing hobbies (+ joining clubs/groups with people who share your interests... you may naturally meet women while doing so. pmd's suggestion for dancing lessons is a good one); Working out (it puts you in a better mood and helps you become more attractive); Volunteering (an altruistic guy is attractive... you may also meet women while doing so); Making friends (re: social circles... a guy who has friends is also attractive); etc. There are many other opportunities that I'm sure will become available as Germany starts to open up again. Good luck!
  3. Hahaha I see your point! It would still be fun to add some light "German" touches when decorating the gift basket, or bring some things I know he'd like that aren't necessarily Canadian 
  4. Haha I'm you're probably right! I was just excited by the prospect because I've spent Christmas (and by extension my birthday) alone for the past couple of years due to family complications. We're probably both being a tad unrealistic... call it youthful optimism? 😂   Thank you for the recommendations though! If I can't come over this December, I definitely will keep these gift ideas in mind when I finally do visit friends in Europe! (Or maybe send over a care package if international postage works.)
  5. A gift basket is a wonderful idea! I might just use it Thank you!!
  6. Woop! Now, hopefully international flights will be an actual thing in seven months.
  7. Haha that explains why he thought I meant the 24th when I said my birthday was around Christmas! Very interesting. I read that kids opened their presents on Christmas Eve as well, so this is really great to know!   I also read that the 26th is the Second Day of Christmas in Germany, which happens to be my birthday. In Commonwealth countries like Canada, it's Boxing Day like the UK, and we have a lot of sales so it becomes a day of consumerism haha. (But Boxing Day isn't a thing in all English-speaking countries, as I discovered coming to the US.) Do Germans do anything on the 26th? Or is it not as meaningful of a day, like the 25th?
  8. Thank you, Feierabend! This is exactly the type of answer I was looking for Comparing to when I visit Asia or see family acquaintances, it'd be customary to bring higher-end alcohol (mostly wines or spirits), fight over the cheque for a large meal at a good restaurant, or bring some other semi-fancy thing. But from what you're describing, it seems to make more sense to bring something small that's more personal/thoughtful and creatively packaged to Germany. Well noted! I'll have a lot of fun with this!   Haha since that is more or less settled, I'd love to hear more about Christmas customs or social norms! Otherwise, I'll let you guys know how he reacts to my impending confession when it happens. Thanks, all!
  9. Haha I'm not the biggest fan of Poutine! But we'll see Thanks, Krieg.
  10. Yeah, I'm just afraid of making things awkward or seeming desperate. Plus, I really think this quarantine is making me go a little crazy. Even though I don't think he's interested at this point, I'll try to bring it up the next time I see him. That won't be for a while though haha
  11. Haha aww I thought it might be fun to bring presents for the festive season!   Edit: I'd likely be flying from the Canadian capital after visiting my parents for a bit, not staying in New York too long
  12. Thank you for your suggestions and insights, @alderhill!! I completely forgot that Coffee Crisps were an exclusively Canadian thing haha. Loved them as a kid. My family's Chinese Canadian from the West Coast, so I might bring them some cute New Years snacks and decorations as well!   Between your and Santitas's experiences though, I feel like I should just get rid of the crush and view the Christmas invite as any other friendly vacation. Even if he acts like he's into me sometimes, I don't wanna hurt myself by holding onto false hope.   That said, he is a good friend to have, and I still look forward to the upcoming cultural exchange haha 
  13.   100 is a lot of people! I've only met 4 or 5 Germans here in NYC, and most of them have flown back home haha That's kinda of a relief though, because I'm not sure how I would feel about spending the holidays in church 😂   I wonder if I'm overthinking things a little. We're just friends after all, and it's entirely possible that international travel won't be normalized any time soon...
  14. Haha, thanks Bobby! It does make me quite curious about the region's history and religious divides now :)
  15. Haha this is something that confuses me about German geography. While he described himself as Bavarian and seems to be Catholic, he wouldn't technically be Bavarian, right? If Franconia comprises the majority of the North of the province?