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Posts posted by Neil373

  1. There's this man taking a walk around the red light district and he passes a whorehouse with a blinking sign saying: "The Hooker With Three Breasts...". The man get's just a little interested and thinks: "Well... that could be a once-in-a-lifetime experience." So he goes in and walks up to the man behind the counter. "I'd like to see the hooker with the three breasts," he says.


    "Are you sure you can afford that... It'll cost you a thousand dollars," the pimp replies. But, the man is too exited, pulls his wallet and pays him the money. So, he's taken up three stairs to a little room in the back of the house and when he opens the room... there she is. The room is dark, but as he comes closer he sees it... three breasts! And so the man absolutely has the night of his life.


    The next day the man walks past that same whorehouse and thinking of the night before and the time he had, he goes in and pays the pimp another thousand dollars. Again, he goes up three stairs to that little dark room in the back of the house. And as the day before, she lies there waiting.


    But, as he walks up to the hooker, he sees that something is wrong... "Hey! You had three breasts yesterday," he says after which she smiles and says, "What did you expect honey... you can only suck out a boil like that once!"


  2. A guy walked into a bar and ordered a triple scotch. The bartender poured him the drink and the guy drank it down in one gulp.


    "Wow," said the bartender. "Something bad musta happened."


    "I came home early today," answered the guy. "I went up to the bedroom, and there was my wife having s e x with my best friend."


    The bartender poured the dude another triple shot. "This one's on the house." The guy gulped it down once again.


    The bartender asked, "Did you say anything to your wife?"


    The guy answered, "Yeah, I walked up to her and told her we were through. ‘Pack your bag's and get out!’ I told her."


    "What about your friend?" asked the bartender.


    "I looked him straight in the eye and said, ‘Bad dog!’"