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About sonazeit

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  • Location Hamburg
  • Nationality USA
  • Gender Female
  1. A neighbor is asking for those willing to lend a hand for a bit to plant some seeds for the Hamburg bees. Helps bring butterflies too. I think he would like word to get out more in Hamburg for that event in case you know anyone who is eco or flower friendly, please spread the word. Contribute seeds, help a bit to do some digging...    
  2. Divorcing in Germany with a young child

    Do you have a way for the Poster to save his fatherhood and home? He is asking for advice on what to do, what to expect. I believe Spider's post is accurate as to what to expect in terms of what the JA will allow the Poster at most. I think he has a Chance for more if he has political connections or alignment with the Party controlling his local JA. What else would improve his chances when the JA is generally very against 2 Parent model when one Parent does not like it.  90% of men lose their children when in the Poster's situation and get the standard SPD once every two weeks visiting permission until the mum decides to move the child farther away. Do you know a way for him to prevent being abused this way?  I think it is sad that so many children don't have their dads in their daily lives.                          
  3. Divorcing in Germany with a young child

    What is irrational in the post?   What are the inaccuracies?    The situation I posted is documented by Tens of thousands of legal cases in Germany in the past decade.   What exactly then ought this dad now do to ensure he stay a dad active in the life of his child? If you have the answer PLEASE post it and please tell also the Folks at the above link, they know thousands of men who also want to be active in the lives of their children.    I gave the Poster a Synopsis of the current how it is situation in DE, which situation is not in line with German, EU, or UN law but rather with the SPD Party platform of more Single mother families, more children in full-time daycare, and more non-orphans in orphanages.   Logistics to co parenting is not a problem. Lack of will on the Part of a b users is. If you want to co parent then you move to where the child is even if it's just crashing on a Couch in a flat close to where the child is. With coparenting an Option despite an abuser's reluctance, children will be moved away from parents less often.    I don't see how having two parents instead of one sCrews up taking care of a child.    If you think two parents is bad for a child then go ahead and abandon your child as soon as you give birth, no one is Stopping you, but I would be sad thinking that your child does not have his or her mum as I believe that is a wonderful Part of life and gives a child solid roots.   I am one of those who think two parents for children are better than one and when there are grandparents and other family in the life of a child then even better.   Two parents working Part time will have Trouble taking care of a child if there are two parents in the Childs life? Must be different in the UK. In HH, two parents full time, Part-time, one Parent only working, all work out fine in terms of co parenting a child.    The only obstacle in Germany is the abusive Parent. This abuse is rampant and State enforced with no legal recourse.                
  4. Divorcing in Germany with a young child

    If kid is Small kid usually goes to mum, if kid is older and dad is fun then dad has a Chance (ahem: Nintendo, Trips to the Shore,,,). If mum has been caught expressing a political view against the poltical View of the local JA then dad has a Chance, for example, if she is against immunization or maybe against gender mainstreaming or whatever the local Government Party which has JA control is pushing for children. The JA will select the Parent on politicial views to Match their own. HH JA ist very Strong SPD political platform, for example, but the JA in your area could be Controller by a different Party. Maybe find the political Leaning of the local JA in your area?    JA is tries to get rid of one or more parents as it is their Business Model. Business Model of the huge 'helperindustry'. If kid is sleeping at your place and not Hers 50% or more of the time then she loses money.   Maybe if you cannot get 50/50, as usually JA rejects it if one Parent does not want it (hence petititons to the Government are made now and then to try to introduce 2 Parent Model when good for the child even when one spouse does not want it), even if clearly better for the child), then I suggest to counteroffer this: she gets the money, kid sleeps more often at her place than yours, but you get to be on Kita/school Contact List and 2 or 3 days a week you and not her are the one involved at the school/Kita/Sports club where ever the child is weekdays and then you bring the child to the mum to sleep in the evening.    Then she can't cry that the child has no home because of 50/50, and that she is not getting money from the Government and you.  Will help you avoid parental aliention, that is a huge risk so needs to be prevented. There are spaces for two parents in school Records and both parents can be added to email lists. I always put my spouse on those Lists when he did not have SR so he would feel welcome as opposed to the usual situation which is thousands of men are being chronically bullied out of the daily lives of their children simply because the mum does not like the dad, or used the dad as a sperm Doner or ATM Maschine or both.   The DE fathers advocacy groups are today splintered and do not coordinate efforts on political law and custom change and to help each other on the ground so change is slow. If they Consolidated some of their websites and mailind lists then it would move faster.   JA? Expect to be Lied to and notes to be taken to put in your child's Stasi-like file with them and absolutely no help to be given to either you or your child. Expect the Verfahrensbeistand to do whatever the JA tells them to do. Expect the judge to do whatever the JA tells them to do. Expect the JA to help isolator the child, help put stone after stone in your way to be a Parent.    The #Metoo Women had a MUCH better marketing campaign. And it was more of multiple Women against one man, here is is usually one Woman against one man. I am trying to see if affected parents can Start posting online naming the JA, Helper Industry, kid warehouses, and JA people who are doing this injustice.   That is, name their names, organizations, and City. This way many fathers could post about the same individuals who are abusing their power. This could make it more like the Metoo in terms of multiple persons hurt by on Person in power could add their posts together agierst that one person so as in Metro there would Start to be some at least social embarassment perhaps for some of the power abusers and perhaps fathers could start objecting to particular JA, Verfahrendsbeitand, judge; Gutachter... on the Basis of multiple complaints showing systematic bias.   The 2 Parent Model campaign in Germany has a dumb name that makes it sound as if the Goal is to make a child homeless as opposed to the Goal being two parents in the daily life of a child continuing to do what parents need to do. I am trying to get proponents to change the name form Wechsel to 2 Parent Model or something like that.     If you are German and spouse is not then you have a Chance. If not, will be hard as per JA it is ipso facto child endangerment for a child of separated parents to have the Option of leaving the power realm of the DE JA. Better on Hartz IV and isolated in  a bad neighborhood in DE than living comfortably in a good neighborhood in another country is the View time and time again of the JA.    Sometimes you get Lucky, but the Tide is (at least in HH, not sure how your location is: SPD, Men are the outsiders and bad (unless active in the SPD Party, SPD Party-controlled  or spouting actively the SPD political platform) for children, the mums need their peace (she will not say she needs peace but rather that the child neeeds peace, even though chidlren clearly feel sad when they do not have two parents in their lives and not at all at peace, this is the Mantra regurgitaed M-F thousands of times a day in German courts by the JA, Helper Industry, and muss all who want to take your kid and you money from you, you are someone to be robben in their eyes, so smile back and them and keep that happy peaceful smile on your face while knowing your'e looking in the faces of sadistic psychopaths who Profit by family destruction and all dance to the same tune thy have agreed on, they chat, decide which Parent to kick out or both, do it, and there is no legal recourse as their is no oversight, the EU knows the problem but DE is in the EU powerful so continues day after day a Thousand times a day in DE) and they only have peace by bullying their spouses out of the lives of the children. The JA does not require any ability to separate couple form paarten-level thinking. In fact the one who refuses to sepeare couple and Parent level thinking gets the Child. The Bully gets the child.    So, if worst comes to worst, insist to be 2 or three days a week afternoons wherever your child as Umgang is to ensure you also have some Part of the child's daily life, which does not Happen if you see the child only starting friday afternoon or later, the weekday activities of the child are usually over by then.     
  5. 2 Parent Model

    If you are for two parents active in a child's life (taking a child to sports, helping with homework, showing up on birthdays...) please take 2 minutes to sign the the German Bundestag petition which is open for two more days for signing:        
  6. Divorce - Child custody/ moving

    It's up to the JA, if they like you then you may do it. The JA decides pretty much everything and then judges rubber stamp it.
  7. child dental and foot hygiene

    @optimista Thank you for the encouragement, will do.
  8. child dental and foot hygiene

    @optimista, thanks for the ideas but he still blocks her access to the Guttaplast and disposable scalpels.      
  9. child dental and foot hygiene

    @krieg no not correct.      
  10. child dental and foot hygiene

    Thanks for responding to these mundane questions. I need to get better at influencing for the benefit of my daughter.   @Fraufruit     If he finds his wife or mother in law taking his child to her regular dental check up threatening or an infringement of his rights, that is his right to call the police to complain.   @LeonG   Thanks so much for your thoughtful questions.   I guess he just isn't into it. Every parent is diferent. He says he'll take care of it, but then doesn't. He says that it's none of my concern.   I don't see any reason to go to the Jugendamt. They do do not remove blocks to childrens' hygiene or health matters. They write reports and if there is any social work effort required, the child is rented to an orphanage. This is because they have no budget for doing social work, yet unlimited budget for renting children to orphanages, in fact perversely they get net cash flow in by this Vermittlung. The focus is therefore overwhelmingly on Kindervermittlung to orphanages.   @Marianne013   The assistant at the dentist near us does actual cleaning when my daughter goes.   @swimmer    We live near a popular pool and there are about 6 schools and 10 Kitas in the neighborhood. She got one wart (it spread) two summers ago probably from there and I try to reduce risk to other children by making sure she and her pals keep something on their feet when not actually swimming   @metall   I want my daughter to have two parents, JA wants to rent children to orphanages.        
  11. child dental and foot hygiene

    Plantar wart effective treatment:   My daughter was told by two separate doctors, her pediatrician and a private dermatologist, to use more effective treatment for her plantar warts, specificallyacid pads and scrape once a week and mabe come in for a freezing as well at the private dermatologist. It is now a year and a half she has had them, I did the usual salycilic acid brush treatment when she first noticed a wart but after a month of that it was clear she needed something stronger.   She wants to do the acid pad treatment, when she is with me she does it herself, even the scraping part by herself. But she is with me seldom, so the warts are still there.   I have not been able to convince my spouse, who controls her, to allow her at his place or in school of in babysitting after schoo, I have time often afternoons but she must be in babysitting :(,  for her to do the treatment.   In warm weather the treatment is impossible with her because she's barefoot and the pads fall right off even with good taping aound them, it's freezing these days so now is a good time to do the treatment, but I cannot convince my spouse to let her do the treatment. Her pediatrician had no luck either to convince hi about a year ago.   In the past when I would buy things for or daughter, be that a bike, or scooter, or dummy/pacifier, her would put it out her reach/hide it. So, even if I buy for him the materials and bring it to him he will not use it and put it out of reach of our daughter.   My daughter needs the treatment. It is painless for her, she can't stand the home freezing treatment, and the private dermatologist told us (my daughter and me) that we parents need to diligently for a long period of time do the treatments, we ought in the case of our daughter not rely on just the painting acid brush.   Any idea how to soften his heart to let her have the treatment? It is low-cost, painless and our daughter knows what to do and is diligent in doing it.   Twice-yearly dental cleaning free from Krankenkasse:   What about the twice yearly dental cleanings by a dental hygenist? Any ideas on how to warm his heart to allow those? They are free for our daughter and her dentist wants her to have them. She has an appointment for tomorrow, it is a school holiday, so she has time, I called her today and she passed the phone to my spouse to tell him about the appointment but then he hung up, so if I try tomorrow to take her to the dentist but he will surely call police to stop her  and then I land in jail and then no income and then I would be homeless, and he would refuse to let her go anyway, that is, I'd be in jail and she'd still not be allowed to go to the dentist, so any idea on how to warm his heart to let her go for the twice a year dental cleanings?   We only have one child, we both have time, and the treatment is free, so I am only missing a way to convince him to allow the dentist visit. It is just for the cleaning the public insurance offers her, she is always blocked by him from her regular great dental hygenist, so after months of calling around I finally found a place that can do it tomorrow at 15:00. But how to get her there?    
  12. How can I tell if a document is in PDF form

    If they are paper then scan them. Scanners usually save as pdf. My bank lets me download statements to pdf form. Do you have online access to your bank account? Maybe if you login and go tot he statement section you have the option of pdf download. pdf files have extension .pdf and are openable in adobe pdf reader.
  13. Teaching your kids to read in English

    I don't think it would at all confuse her. But, I do not get the teach to read concept.   I just read to my daughter out of books with just a little large text per page and pictures on almost every page. When I read we would be in a position in which she would comfortablly look at the page while I was reading.   Key is to find books of interest to her with pages she will want to look at.   For example, the Mo Willems Elephant and Piggie series has just a few words per page, make starting to read easy. You could mabe read those to her, while sitting next to her and she can see each page. One you read the 'bananas' page of Mo Willems' 'We are in a Book' once to her, she'll be most likely able to read it herself thereafter. If they are not in your local library the library might be willing to buy the series if enough other parents ask.   Then after that maybe comic series? The words are tiny, so maybe read her the stores while she looks at te pages and then after some months she will reread them to herself if she likes the topic.   Happy Happy Clover  Yotsuba   In sum, books with just a few words per page and with pictures so the child will look at the book and on a topic the child likes, be that football, ponies, or wizards, it will probably work.   I don't have tv or pc games in the home. That helped too.   There is a tacky website called with an american accent and if your daughter likes to stare at a computer screen it will teach her to read short words and short sentences.              
  14. Spouse froze my bank account without judgement

    @annegus, not sure if you get emails form TT any more, rearding the very typical denial of legally-mandated services to children in their parents‘ home and other things that JA systematically does that is not according to EU law, there is a call for complaints to be submitted now... a person has put in a complaint at EU level on how JA breaks laws...if anyone can recommend an EU attorney who has alot of skkills on this please let me know as I need to hire one.
  15. Teaching German Grammar to your children

    I just know some German parents get a workbook called 'Polly', my daughter liked it, but probably because at the time her stuff from her special ed mish mash class was so boring and useless to her that pretty much anything in comparison would have looked interesting to her...   For example: Grammatik 4: Einfache Wortarten und Satzglieder (Sprachbetrachtung), Ubungsprogramm mit Losungen fur die 4. Klasse (Vorbereitung fur den Ubertritt an weiterfuhrende Schulen): 9783881002141: Books   The answers are included - parents can pull out.