halosad

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About halosad

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  • Location Heidelberg
  • Nationality Taiwan
  • Gender Female
  • Year of birth 1989
  1. Hello everybody,    Some background information   Through the standard procedure - wg gesucht -> visited the flat -> met my flatmate -> signed the contract as a subrenter -> moved in last July. She is around mid 30s or nearly 40. Has a dog. Not working.  Contact is between my flatmate and me. A sublease for the room I have.  Later on I found out that the apartment is actually rented by her girlfriend, and she subleased the whole flat from her girlfriend. I transfer my rent to her girlfriend's bank account - When I just moved in, I asked my flatmate that so I just transfer the rent to the landlord (because I saw it on the contract that the account is not under my flatmate's name). She answered yes.  Her girlfriend was there when I visited the apartment. But they didn't say a word about it.  Her girlfriend has the key to the flat. Entered and stayed anytime. Almost 5 days a week they're there together the whole day.    I work as a freelancer and my work engagements are mainly outside of Berlin. I'm here in the flat less than 50% of the time.    I pay my rent regularly.   Situations   Early stage: - She ignored almost every time when I greeted her like "Hi", "Morning" and "How are you"  - Not replying to my messages regards to notifications of some appointments from the building.  - Rearranging the set up personal stuff in the bathroom and kitchen. But like shifting everything around. Sometimes I had a hard time finding my stuff afterwards. I know we all have different standard, but from my perspective - I'm not any untidier than her. - Using my grocessaries without asking - normally I don't really care. So it was very fine for me in the beginning. I sometimes bought things like oil, ketchup, or simply just some fruits and put it on the table with the little note "share : ) " . Sometimes she would just put rotten veggies or expired milk/eggs in my section and saying that they're from me. In the beginning I thought I might really forget about it or so. But slowly I realized that they're not even from the shops I normally do groceries.    Later on: - She was doing big cleaning in the kitchen when I was about to leave the house. I told her with a smile "thank you so much. please leave the bathroom to me, I'll take care of it these days." She answered without turning her head "You don't have to thank me when I'm cleaning my apartment." - My boyfriend once visited me from Switzerland and stayed four nights with me. I notified her weeks ahead. The only comment she said was "then you have to buy toilet papers because you have more people." One morning we were having breakfast in the kitchen, she's doing things in her studying room with the door opened. We felt a little bit bad that we might bother her with our noise from chatting and making food since she is probably reading or trying to concentrate on something. So we closed the door. She came immediately, shouted to us that "please leave the door open. this kitchen is a common area."  - One week later. She's having lunch at the kitchen table when I arrived home. I entered the kitchen, started to prepare my lunch. She asked me to leave, said "I'm still using the space. You're not allowed to be here."    Now: - Elbowed me to try to cross when I was cooking and standing by the stove chopping my vegetables. Shouting at me saying that " oh yeah it's so important to stand there now ?! "  - I was eating at our kitchen table. She arrived home, came in the kitchen to make coffee and prepare the food for her dog. We didn't speak a single word. And she asked me to leave very impolitely.  - I was super sick. My friend came around to visit me and bring some food - since I'm so terrified to enter the kitchen now. He stayed there for less than two hours. We were mostly just in my room with the door closed. Before my friend was about to leave, he went to the toilet. My flatmate came out from her room, stood right in front of the bathroom with her dog. When my friend came out from the toilet, the dog started to bark at him. My flatmate, "She's (the dog) from here. You're not."   etc. etc. ....   ------------------------   Actually I noticed that she's not completely comfortable with interacting with people the first time I met her. But it's alright for me. I appreciate how she organises the flat and I think she's not a bad person because she takes nice care of her belongings. Then I moved in. Then everything went really far beyond my understanding. Most of the time I still try to stay soft and ask her if there are other things that she actually would like to talk about since I really don't understand why she'd just flic in such an extreme way. She normally responded "I don't want to share my feelings with you." period.    We still never had any crazy fights in my opinions. I try my best not to put extra pressure and damage on her. But slowly I started to have some weird syndromes like sweating, bad headache, panic and so on every time when I hear her in the morning. Few other times when I was on my way home, or after our unpleasant conversations.    I'm moving out by the end of February. She kicked me out basically - I don't mind, I planned to move anyway.    In general she's getting more and more aggressive. I really don't understand. I try to spend as little time at home as possible. So now I'm just wondering if there's anything I can do to protect myself or at least to ask for some justice if things ever gotten worse in the coming weeks... And I really have a feeling that to live and deal with her has caused some threats on my mental health...      Thank you so much in advance.