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Saturday 20.Dec.2014

StarStarStar (6)   The Vent by boondoggle
OUCH!!! You vicious f*cking wildebeest! That's my vein you're slapping!!! Do you not see the neon hue and unprecedented heights to which you've already brought it? Sadomasochism of the hand--no thank you! Other regions maybe, but nay, not from you, Brunhilde! Another fair maiden already covers that front, madam! Most ungeil of you! Finally, you reach some imperceptible threshold, discernable only to the piercing Brunhildean intellect, and the slapping ceases. The needle lowers to my vein. And as I look away, you plunge inside me to the hilt. "Mistress," I think, "thou prickest! What merrie weapon brandishest thee?" Because I know this is making you happy. Looking not into my searching eyes, you turn away and… (another 399 words)

Friday 19.Dec.2014

StarStarStarStarStar (10)   Why are you unhappy today? by dessa_dangerous
@ Aine: if you just needed a vent, here is as good a place to do it as anywhere else, and we're all behind you. Sometimes you gotta vent before you can push through. That's normal. If it's that you really cannot/will not do the thing, then talk to your partner. Heck, I've been married to my husband's family for eight years (only five of those to the man himself however) and I STILL let him do the dirty work. The delivery of bad news is up to him. Sometimes, if it's just about me not making it to a lunch or something, I'll call up his mother myself and submit my excuse/apology. But when I feel [strike]they've[/strike] she's really crossed the line, I politely request my husband to handle it. There is no shame in asking your partner to communicate your wishes… (another 130 words)
StarStarStar (6)   Why are you unhappy today? by chaos_amoeba
God, what a situation. Aine, your in-laws sound more of a headache than mine, and mine are currently having histrionics about xmas Again (or as per blooming usual). Others are saying the right thing - you don't have to take this from them, really you don't. Especially not when you are ill - which you are! Depression IS an illness, don't let Anyone start telling you that you can't be depressed at Christmas, or have to snap out of it because you have guests, or any of that - it is total bullsh*t. [I spent a week recently with my in-laws on a cruise ship being told I had to cheer up and show some respect to my in-laws by enjoying the holiday they paid for (that was my SIL - luckily, my husband is more understanding of how depression works) and the strain of it quite literally… (another 111 words)

Thursday 18.Dec.2014

StarStarStarStarStar (9)   Why are you unhappy today? by Irish_Aine
why would you make some plans with your son and daughter in law....then the week before christmas and decide to inflict them on your other son and daughter in law instead. My partners younger brother is a professional chef, he had a whole menu planned for christmas for his parents coming down to his in munich for the week. They then decided today that they go to his for christmas eve. and come to ours for christmas day and the next two days before going back home to near aachen... we already had our plans which was getting some frozen goose meat, defrosting it and having it with some potatoes, the german spuds, red cabbage, veges and some gravy...what we think is a very yummy dinner that both of us will enjoy. and we cant find any restaurants that will be open so gonna have to provide very… (another 57 words)
StarStarStarStar (7)   Why are you unhappy today? by Metall
Seriously, I would not accept this behavior from the parents. Ask them for a single Christmas present: Your peace and quiet for the holidays. Don't do the entertaining. Don't let them come. I am quite worried about your posts of the last days, and this could be the final straw. If the parents are German, they might understand the term "Winterdepression". Never mind what the real issues are, just give them words they might understand. So they realize you have way too much on your plate. Enlist the brother's help, maybe he can talk to them. This is not a time to make others happy, you've got to make yourself a bit happier. You're number one on your care list now! I have had terrifically bad family Christmasses myself, it's a wonder I'm still sane...… (another 49 words)
StarStar (3)   Why are you unhappy today? by fraufruit
Feed them what you were having for Xmas Eve and then feed them whatever you would have the next day. Surely some restaurants will be open as well on the 26th. Your partner can entertain his parents. Breathe.
StarStar (3)   Why are you unhappy today? by Metall
No! I say, No! The parents are antagonizing several people at the same time, and THEN they dare make demands! I say talk to your boyfriend - even better, get him on the phone with the brother and you, and put your foot down! The guys have *got* to protect you now! Tell them flat out you are too fragile to deal with this. Maybe appeal to the guy thing - protect the girl, whatever. But the entire affair is doomed from the beginning, don't even try to do the parent entertaining! This is a fine example of Christmas turning into a nightmare - say that out loud! *grumbles about egomaniac insensitive relatives*
StarStar (4)   The Vent by LostinLuneburg
What part of "I worked for several years with troubled teens" made the response "Because you talk as if you know something about teenagers" in any way appropriate??
StarStar (4)   Over the counter medicine for a yeast infection by noodle76
You can go into any pharmacy and say 'Ich brauche etwas gegen Scheidenpilz'. They have a vast array of different kinds of pills and potions. Hope it goes away quickly!
StarStar (4)   Strange German habits by godz_magnum_opus
The penchant for choosing extreeeeemly long filenames. (But don't dey reflect everything about the work accurately denn?) Normally, when I start writing a paper or a computer program, the filenames read something like paperXYZ.tex / manuscriptRST.doc / progABC.cpp where XYZ, ABC, and RST are one or two words or abbreviations that reflect the main subject of that work. Alternatively, they may be called even just paper.tex etc. if the folder they are inside reflects something about the subject. Recently, my advisor asked me and a colleague to write a scientific review on a topic we had been working on for the last years. I sat with the colleague, discussed a possible title and table of contents. He volunteered to put in the first text and then share the file (on a version control system).… (another 40 words)
StarStar (3)   What fees to charge for translation work by JN53
I just thought I'd give a quick update. The translation (that I talked about sometime ago) was shortened and the pay increased and I only have to do part of it right now. I sure am learning how long it really takes to do translation. I think I'll stick with short stuff in the future.
StarStar (3)   What fees to charge for translation work by onemark
@ Conquistador (#311): You're right. Ours is a grossly underpaid, much-maligned and generally underrated profession. We are written off as glorified secretaries and scribblers who have the audacity to charge outrageously high fees for what is after all only writing. End of bitching session. Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year anyway. onemark.
StarStar (3)   Gift card scam at Abercrombie & Fitch by dessa_dangerous
I realize this isn't terribly helpful to your wife at the moment but I'd sincerely hesitate before calling this a "scam"--who failed to get the receipt? Your wife. Therefore she is at least 50% responsible for the fact that she now has a non-activated gift card and no proof of payment. As with anything that requires some sort of registration or activation to be usable, it makes zero sense to walk away from the point of purchase without a receipt. Again, I know, not terribly helpful in this specific situation but also a reason why shouting at the manager is both futile and misdirected. The worst that can be confirmed here is carelessness on both sides. There is no way to prove that the cashier pocketed the cash, nor is there any indication of a broader conspiracy. It may… (another 341 words)
StarStar (3)   Trying to trace the family of pilot killed in WW2 by BattalionBoy
I must say Big John you and your father’s intentions are admirable. For example there may be an only sister of this person alive that may be consoled by any information of this person’s death. I say this because my mother only had one brother and he was killed in WW2 and it affected her deeply. She blamed Churchill and would leave the room whenever something came on TV about him. I was reading his books “History of the English Speaking Peoples” which had Churchill’s face on the front cover and my mother would always turn the books over face down whenever they were left face up. After Dunkirk and loss of H.M.S. Hood morale was at its lowest in the UK and Churchill pushed for a victory in North Africa at all costs. Her brother was in the 4th Royal Tank Regiment had to advance against… (another 35 words)

Wednesday 17.Dec.2014

StarStarStarStarStar (10)   Proposing a motion to support Hausmeister by PandaMunich
Attached imageThat may sound trivial to you, but I think at least the lack of a mobile is a problem in a Hausmeister, who has to be able to respond to emergencies. How about getting him an easy to use mobile phone and teaching him how to use it? That would contribute to his job security. From experience with technophobe relatives, I can recommend the Panasonic KX-TU327 (it's cheaper on ebay): it's reasonably resistant to being dropped. the display background colour can be set to white (settings --> display --> background), to make it easier to read. it comes with its own charging dock, so he would just have to put it in the cradle to recharge, no fiddling around with a cable. since it's a clamshell model, he can accept a call just by opening the phone (and terminate a call by… (another 61 words)
StarStarStar (5)   Proposing a motion to support Hausmeister by Metall
I really, really like that idea. These days, a Hausmeister really needs a mobile phone to do his job. Email not so much. You'll still have enough time to set your Hausmeister up with the phone AND write your letter.
StarStarStarStarStar (9)   Help finding a doctor that actually cares by Small Town Boy
The problem is that the OP seems to define as "good" a doctor prepared to listen to her tales of woe for an hour and then prescribe antibiotics to cure a sore throat. Despite her username, she still has quite an American attitude to medication.
StarStarStar (6)   Help finding a doctor that actually cares by fraufruit
For the recored, I have public insurance and none of my doctors ever blow me off. I don't think that is the issue here. It may take a little trial and error but there are good doctors out there.
StarStar (3)   Help finding a doctor that actually cares by jeba
The thing is that your GP will only get around € 7.- for listening to your story if you are publicly insured. So it´s no big surprise most won´t give you an hour of their time to listen to you if you have a cold. If that´s important to you try going as a private patient - but paying out of pocket. This will probably buy you some more time. Whether that helps is another question though as there is no real cure for viral infections such as common colds. So they probably won´t be able to tell you more than you were told here already: try to boost your immune system by outdoor activities, going to gym regularly, sauna followed by dips in ice water, eating healthily etc.
StarStar (3)   Help finding a doctor that actually cares by northtraveller
it is clear that any person who takes a career seriously cannot afford to stay home every time a small child is sick. They wouldn't need day care in the first place if they could stay home to look after their children. And if all people cared for their children at home, there would be no need for a kindergarden. Small children get sick all the time, it is normal. Working in such an environment can be frustrating if your immune system is not used to it. It takes a couple of years to get used to the thing and then it gets better. There is nothing more a doctor can do than give you things to alleviate symptoms and most people wouldn't go to the doctor at all for a cold if they didn't need a Krankenschein. As said if you need more time with the doctor, try as a selbstzahler... But he… (another 187 words)
StarStarStar (6)   Church tax by Gwaptiva
No, it is the fact that Caritas and Diakonie are massive employers that aren't treated like other employers just because they are operated by a church the state approves of. The right to strike is a fundamental right in Germany, but that right is denied the million or so people employed by these two organisations. That is what I object to, both from a moral/ethical perspective as from an social-economic perspective (falsifying competition). I want a state where religion is a personal matter for individual citizens, where the state sets rules that apply equally to all natural and legal persons, irrespective of that religion (as this state claims but obviously not practises). No tax breaks, no employment legislation loopholes, no picking&choosing which religions are real religions and… (another 76 words)
StarStarStar (6)   Health insurance for the unemployed by the.frollein
You're right, BUT. You will need to submit the proper forms (applied for from the UK) to get access to German public healthcare, and you will need to pay the monthly fee of approx. 150 Euros to get coverage. There is no NHS here, "public healthcare" must be paid for. If I understand you properly, you don't necessarily have time for getting and submitting forms at the moment anyway, because you need to see a doctor *now*. Strongly seconding the suggestion made by Plantwhisperer in post #8, to get in touch with either John G. or Starshollow - both are independent insurance brokers, active here on TT and have vast experience dealing with expat issues. Consulting them doesn't cost you anything, btw.
StarStar (3)   Health insurance for the unemployed by the.frollein
Sounds like you didn't do much research to prepare for your move to Germany... All German residents must register their address within a week or so of moving. Read this TT Wiki page for more information on Anmeldung. All German residents are required by law to have German (or BaFin-approved international) health insurance. Everyone pays their own, whether it's public or private. Again, there is no NHS here. Since you're unemployed, you pay the lowest mandatory rate yourself, which is approx. 150 Euros a month. Once you get a job, your rate will be higher and your employer will pay half, and the other half will be taken out of your gross salary. Read this TT Wiki page for more information on health insurance.
StarStarStar (5)   Jokes by BobUK
A guy goes to the Post Office to apply for a job. The interviewer asks him, "Are you allergic to anything?" He replies, "Yes, caffeine. I can't drink coffee." "Ok, Have you ever been in the military service?" "Yes," he says, "I was in Iraq for one tour." The interviewer says, "That will give you 5 extra points toward employment." Then he asks, "Are you disabled in any way?" The guy says, "Yes. A bomb exploded near me and I lost both my testicles." The interviewer grimaces and then says, "Okay. You've got enough points for me to hire you right now. Our normal hours are from 8:00 am to 4:00 pm. You can start tomorrow at 10:00 am, and plan on starting at 10:00 am every day." The guy is puzzled… (another 57 words)
StarStarStar (5)   Visa extension for a student from India by seeking
Update: There was no change in the visa situation, which meant that the student had to leave Germany by 5 Dec. He finally presented his Masterarbeit and received excellent feedback from the professors and the manager of the company with whom he did his internship. After that, however, the university seemed not too much interested in helping further with visa issues. Meanwhile he found a job in Stuttgart and the employer helped out with all the paperwork. All this while the student kept in touch with the German embassy in Delhi, found out all the details needed to apply for an employment visa, and sought an appointment with them for getting his visa application papers verified. He was told that it would take 10 to 15 days to get the visa. In the event, he got it within 2 days. That must be… (another 19 words)
StarStar (4)   Health insurance for already pregnant women by Starshollow
What you have is probably a so-called Expat-insurance from providers/brokers like Mawista, CareConcept, BDAE or the likes, right? These are essentially only travel-health insurances in definition. Thus they can - in contrast to real health insurances - exclude coverage for pregnancy. In order to fully understand your situation, one would need to see all the documents you have from first contact with the insurance company (or did you work thru an agent or broker? If you don't know the difference between agent or broker, read more about this here: ). Because first of all one would have to determine if you have been fully and properly advised under German consumer protection laws. Especially at the point of extension for your existing… (another 429 words)
StarStar (3)   US Military Reserve Retiree SOFA by Conquistador
Elfenstar, while it's good that you're trying to be helpful, as least as regards the issue of health insurance for a military retiree in this situation, it's probably still the case that your comments simply aren't applicable. A significant number of US military retirees still live here, so the German authorities do know what TRICARE is and should know if it still meets German health insurance requirements.
StarStar (3)   Nice person of the day award by Sir Percy B
The difference £3.00 can make to someone's life, 1 less person off the streets this Christmas. Preston student sleeps rough to repay homeless man Robbie's kindness
StarStar (3)   Receiving a package from Deutsche Post or DHL by Smaug
You go to whomever you pay your rent to. Tell them (don't ask them) to have your name put wherever it needs to go. Give them a deadline of a couple of days. If they still don't do it threaten with with withdrawing a percentage of your rent. All of this in writing. In the meantime sellotape a makeshift label on the door with your name until the screen is updated. It really gets my goat when people push around others because they are young/naive/in a new, unfamiliar environment! That's what they are doing with you.

Tuesday 16.Dec.2014

StarStarStarStarStarStarStar (14)   Help finding a doctor that actually cares by Marianne013
It'll take about three years and then you'll be immune to most of the bugs small children at your location carry. You will have a hard time though finding a doctor who really cares about a bad cold. In their first years of life children (in a public care setting) get an average of 12 olds a year, if we banned children with colds, they'd only be there half of the time and you'd be out of a job. As for the "choice" - it's your choice to work in a kindergarten and not everyone has backup when it comes to childcare (in fact most people coming in from abroad won't have any relatives at hand), so you'll just have to deal with those little virus vectors. I had a choice to have a child, but I don't see why I should my (state paid) education go to waste over… (another 25 words)
StarStarStar (5)   Help finding a doctor that actually cares by Smaug
Don't bother with any of this. All these common remedies have been empiricaly proven to be useless in preventing/treating colds and flu symptoms. The most favorable studies show that vitamine C shortens symptons by about a day, but most show it's no better than a placebo. Even prescription drugs like Relenza and Tamiflu provide very little benefit. For someone like you who works surrounded by small bio-hazards all day your best shot is to get the flu shot every year as soon as possible and just grin and bear it when you get a cold because you just are going to keep getting them.
StarStar (4)   Help finding a doctor that actually cares by chaos_amoeba
Maybe try booking an appointment when you are not sick and don't need a dr's note [avoids German word choice controversy^ ] to discuss your constant illnesses and the fact you think this has worsened / is not normal. There are a few things you could usefully be tested for, and this way, your Dr will understand that you really consider this an issue, as opposed to you've come for a sick note, but are moaning about constant illness on the side. Meanwhile, don't waste your money on the snakeoil that is marketed to people in your miserable situation... Things that for which there's evidence of a positive effct on immunity include: Increase the amount of exercise you do; if you drink, cut down; if you smoke, consider quitting; if you are overweight, try to remedy that. You said… (another 86 words)
StarStar (4)   Help finding a doctor that actually cares by Beuel
If you describe your symptoms like you wrote your post, the docs may get the impression that you exaggerate a bit. I don't want to trivialize that you feel unwell and I don't mean this in a critizising way, there are just some differences in perception of language use and differences in expectations as to what "bedside manner" means. The docs probably think all you want is a Krankenschein, because most Germans wouldn't go to the doc with a common cold (it's winter after all) unless they want Krankschreibung. In Germany (and Skandinavian countries as far as I know) people learn that the right thing to do is to downplay what ails them - not that all of them do it, of course. "Indianerherz kennt kein Schmerz". Doctors adjust their impression accordingly.
StarStarStar (6)   Why are you happy today? by katheliz
I just got a phone call from one of the three women I'm still in touch with whom I met in 1947 when we were all 9-year-olds. It's nice to know we're all doing well. Two are still married, to husbands in their late 80s. As one says, "My body is 77, but my mind hasn't got the message yet and thinks I'm still in my thirties!"
StarStarStar (6)   What made you laugh today? by sarabyrd
@ tor: Q: How many congregants does it take to change a light bulb in a synagogue? A: CHANGE? You want we should CHANGE the light bulb? My grandmother donated that light bulb!!! I wish Jew would shut up about Nazis!
StarStarStar (5)   Church tax by sosarx
In real life terms I as an atheist feel no discrimination in whatever field of my life. Absolutely zero. That's what counts. Not some hypothetical discrimination of an atheist who chooses to work for a catholic organisation like Caritas and then feels discriminated because he can't strike. Church and state aren't completely separated in Germany (and many other countries). This reflects the historical power of the church. Also the wish of law makers which are, surprise surprise,in majority members of churches. And even in countries with (officially) complete separation you will find an enormous impact of churches in daily life. Or would someone call the US an laicist state? Haha.
StarStar (4)   New TV license fee, €17.98 a month from 01/2013 by Editor Bob
There is no GEZ law. None at all. This is something most people don't realise. The Bundestag is simply not involved. Instead there is merely a contract, a "Vertrag", between the union of the private broadcasting companies (ARD, ZDF, Deutchlandradio) and each of the 16 states of Germany. Each state, individually, through their own local government, had to ratify and agree to their own copy of the contract. There is no law saying you have to pay TV licence fees. Rather, two other parties have made a contract between themselves. The TV companies promised to broadcast, the state governments in return agreed to enforce fee collection. It's one of the insidious ways in which the GEZ machine manages to keep grip. The system could never go through the Bundestag because it does… (another 38 words)
StarStar (4)   Proposing a motion to support Hausmeister by MadAxeMurderer
I have 3 apartments in one building in Nürnberg. It comes with a truly splendid Hausmeister, a German Romanian. I slip him a few €100 per year, and any small problem in the apartments he fixes in a jiffy. I've also used him for handovers, and I even get him to fix things in another apartment for which he isn't Hausmeister. I even asked a tenant once: All my life as a tenant Hausmeisters have been assholes. Is Herr Schimpf nice because I'm a landlord? His answer: No he's a genuinely great Hausmeister. The management company makes life difficult for him. Apparently one of the employees would like a relative to take his job and flat. They make trivial complaints like he has no Email or mobile. I have no problem calling him at lunchtime or the evening when I know he'll… (another 80 words)
StarStar (3)   Having insurance pay for vitamins by rmaetzing
I have health issues that affect some of my vitamin levels. To be honest, they only check the ones they have reason to suspect you might have problems with, so who knows how many are deficient. However, my D was checked by my endocrinologist, as I have autoimmune thyroid issues and D deficiency is very common (among digestive issues hindering great absorption). I had a severe deficiency so was told to take 1000 units a day, which the OTC versions aren't really adequate to use for anyway. Later, when trying to concieve, my levels were also registering as a bit low so I was given the script again. Now that I am pregnant, I get it as well. I don't always take it in summer, except when I was trying for a baby. The benefits of it are readily apparent and poor nutrition is a common cause… (another 445 words)
StarStar (3)   Can you face deportation if no money to fly back? by kaffeemitmilch
Having spoken to US consular staff in the past, I know that they will first try to connect you with your family or friends so you can get cash from them. If you can show nothing is forthcoming from them, then they can give you an emergency repatriation loan (here's the manual for consular officers: and here's an account of it: Good luck!

Monday 15.Dec.2014

StarStarStarStarStarStarStarStarStar (18)   Life without alcohol by boondoggle
I'm really sorry to hear about what you're going through, Irish_Aine. You've had some truly f*cked up things happen to you. You're brave to come on here and be open about it and ask for help. I've dealt with depression for most of my life, so I hope some of what I say will help you. I know firsthand that depression makes you tell yourself awful things about yourself (that you'd probably never say to someone else, so why don't you like yourself enough not to be so cruel to yourself?). So I'm going to list some things that I can tell about you just from your posts on this forum. It might not mean much from a stranger, and you might immediately come up with reasons I'm wrong (I do this when I'm depressed and anyone tells me something good about myself),… (another 1,103 words)
StarStarStarStar (7)   Life without alcohol by emkay
Aine, I really do feel for you. If I may be blunt, from what I've read, it seems that your boyfriend situation is at the centre of your problems. I know it's so hard to reach the point of clarity, especially in a foreign country. But once you do, your life, YOUR life will start properly. I've been in this kind of seriously destructive relationship and seen others close to me in the same situation. I was in an horrendous state many years ago and felt that what I was going through was all I deserved. Definitely part of no self esteem as a kid and abusive parents. Alcohol turned into a crutch. Stupid of course because I drank because I thought it made me feel better but it never does. It was part of self delusion. As far as your boyfriend is concerned, you are not a parcel he can ship… (another 164 words)
StarStar (4)   Life without alcohol by fraufruit
It is well known that people with borderline personality, bipolar disorder, depression etc. tend to self medicate with alcohol and/or other substances. It is also well known that there is no cure for borderline and it should be treated with medication and therapy for a lifetime in order to get the best results. Alcohol is not one of the medications that help. Your therapist should be able to help with your insurance problems. I truly hope that you can get yourself sorted. This is not about your boyfriend.
StarStar (3)   Life without alcohol by lisa13
this really struck me: "Dont think my boyfriend is an arsehole, i think he just doesnt have any real life experience " At the risk of sounding insensitive, I have to point out that he does indeed have real life experience, as real as anyone's experience is. I understand that has very little to nothing in common with your experience. But it might help you to look at the fact that not all life experiences are full of pain and abuse as yours was. It might also help to realize that as of now, that pain and abuse caused by others is actually part of your past life experience. Your present life experience is much different - maybe not good, but it is indeed very very different. Your current and future life experience is of the utmost importance. Your past life experience is part… (another 39 words)
StarStarStarStarStarStarStar (13)   Received an invoice when no work was performed by El Jeffo
Found this at (my bold):Write him back and ask him how his practice is compatible with § 632 Absatz 3 BGB (also available in English). If he responds that the thing your wife signed was a contract that authorized him to bill for the cost estimate, demand a copy. If it's really true, then you'll have to pay. You can criticize him all over the Internet as long as you stick to the facts, e.g., "Bat um Kostenvoranschlag, bekam dafür eine Rechnung über EUR 30", and not "greedy, dishonest tool", no matter how true the latter might be.
StarStar (3)   Received an invoice when no work was performed by HellesAngel
I think there's some misunderstanding here - if you call a guy out to fix a washing machine, for example, he'll usually tell you there's a call-out fee of X euro to diagnose the problem and tell you if it's worth fixing. That's fair enough and not what happened to us. This is an electrician job on the fixed installation of the house that would probably be ca. 1000,- euro and for that sort of work it's normal to get a quote, and it's also usual not to pay for it. When I phoned Heigenmoser I pointed out to him that I still need the work doing and if he'd calm down for a moment I'd be happy to continue the conversation in the constructive manner we started. He wasn't interested. I think the Germans describe people like him as 'Koliker'.
StarStarStarStarStar (9)   Why are you happy today? by boondoggle
I'm happy because I'm enjoying a momentary triumph over German bureaucracy. I applied for a new German passport from the US before moving here, spending a lot of time and money to do so, as the nearest consulate was hundreds of miles away (actually, driving through classic American desert to fulfill my obligations to German bureaucracy...strange). They accepted my application at first, but then gave me months of hassle about my birthplace, because it's a county and a county isn't specific enough for them. I emailed them the link to the US Census site that explains how this county is both a county and a city for administrative purposes...there are no towns or cities inside it. Thus, a birthplace other than Boondoggle County doesn't exist. The consulate wouldn't accept… (another 165 words)
StarStar (3)   Why are you happy today? by T.O. to go
Got good news re my 1853.00 screw up....airline waivered 300 x4 change fee plus fare diff 135 x4 ..only 11.64 per person and the ticketing office waived their 28.25 x4 admin fee.....yeaaaa
StarStarStarStar (8)   Why are you unhappy today? by T.O. to go
DEATH... Last Monday I got a message from a client, who was to attend her friends' daughter's wedding and she was to spend time with the friend after. She heard from the daughter that her mum died in her sleep, now the poor girl has to prepare a funeral while planning her wedding. Friday a former colleague who retired from this office came by to book a ticket to go to Jamaica as imminent death of a family member. Yesterday my friend called me to tell me her sister in Jamaica died. She had had a stroke in the summer but had recovered as she was able to visit her kids in England, which is good. My neighbour/friend text me lastnight on way back from Philly, that her father in Jamaica had died. All this before Christmas, hard to celebrate, good time to really touchbase with loved… (another 1 words)
StarStarStar (6)   The Vent by scoobykids
verry funny wife ive got bad chapped lips, so why did she leave the insect repellent stick on the bathroom tray beside the lip balm? it hurts! my lips are still numb 1/2 hour later... seriously gotta learn to read german soon
StarStarStar (5)   New TV license fee, €17.98 a month from 01/2013 by abishell
1. Why does someone have to pay for TV? I can understand the argument it's important to have a state funded, "neutral", television station, especially for state emergencies (e.g. war breaks out or natural disasters). BUT ARD, ZDF and the bullshit they show is not this. Some kind of "special" state funded TV channel does not require €17.98 / month. Sth. like 1c per person per year, which could be funded by our already paid taxes (easily). 2. Society as a whole has NOT decided it will be done this way. A few politicians have (which are SUPPOSED to represent society as a whole, but unfortunately do not). Have you not seen the online petitions? 3. The thing that really shocks me is how people get their rights taken away (in this case, the right to their money) and people… (another 9 words)
StarStar (3)   Translate Dryer Instructions by franklan
Hi, Keep in mind that the dryer doesn't have hands to touch the clothes, so it cannot really know how wet the load is in the beginning. It needs to analyze the moistness of the air in the "exhaust"... Initially, the dryer assumes that your load is soaking wet and assumes a long timespan for drying. When analyzing the state of the air in the "exhaust" after a few minutes of drying the dryer comes to the conclusion that the initial assumption "soaking wet" was wrong and adjusts to "00:50" as remaining time. And the Iron light: It shows the current state of the clothes; If this light is on the clothes are already dry enough to be ironed, but not yet dry enough to be considered "Schranktrocken". Cheers Franklan
StarStar (3)   Translators for linguistic research project by liebling
Maybe a bit more general information would help. Do participants have to be in Berlin or is it an on-line task? Are you looking for participants with formal training and credentials as translators (CELTA, or state-recognized translators) or could you also use as participants those who work (extensively) as translators without formal training and/or credentials? Good luck with the project!
StarStar (3)   When to add "zu" to before a verb by franklan
The problem starts with the fact that "want" is modal in English, but the German "möchte" is not. This web article describes the situation quite well: Cheers Franklan
StarStar (3)   Fired, vacation days not paid as agreed by AncientBrit
Definitely yes - this is Germany, after all, but even though I've never worked here for a German employer, I've always operated on the principle that written correspondence can less easily be disputed.
StarStar (3)   Nice person of the day award by Gwaptiva
Attached imageShowing that some/many/at least a few Australians have the brains to distinguish ... This has started a #illridewithyou and even if it's the other side of the world, it makes my heart swell to see this response

Sunday 14.Dec.2014

StarStarStarStarStar (9)   Fined for insulting a bus driver by newskies
See quoted post. There was no "form" to complete. I'm also not ranting on, the likes of you are sosarx. I received a hand written, two sentence note, from the police, requesting a statement as one wasn't taken. I didn't run to the lawyer as this was my complaint against him. I was merely honest. As I've been on here; Open and honest. I have already entered my appeal too. I didn't feel I had anything to fear. Naive perhaps... I merely asked for advice, suggestions, recommendations but rather I get snide remarks and people assuming I'm guilty or that this is deserved. I've never taken this to be a joke.
StarStarStarStarStar (9)   Why are you unhappy today? by sarabyrd
They are throwing two parties out for Eigenbedarf??? No frigging way, unless they had triplets and have a wet-nurse and nanny moving in as well (just as a f'instance). Tell them that they have to pay through the nose for you to move out. Your thought about the transfer of ownership is A1, make sure that they provide you with a copy of the owners' registry when they do try to terminate. If the Auflassung is not confirmed they have no leverage at all, at all. Even the Auflassungsvormerkung (preliminary transfer of ownership) is not enough. Seriously, ask a lawyer specializing in rental law (or the Mieterverein but a lawyer is more likely to find time for you in his/her schedule).
StarStarStar (6)   Why are you unhappy today? by Mellyco
It looked like we had the perfect apartment lined up - close to my husband's work, cutting my commute by 1/3, in a lovely place, everything was pretty much perfect. And that is not easy when you are looking for a place and have a dog and a cat - it takes a bit more work. Anyway, we were going to go meet the landlord tomorrow morning and sign the contract, but my husband asked him to email it first, so that we could read through it ahead of time since my German obviously isn't good enough. And yeah, we didn't need a Mieterverein to tell us the contract was bizarre - it was evident by the fact it was so old that "DM" for Deutsch Marks was crossed out and replaced with Euros! It was full of old requirements and clauses that have all been tossed out in court over the… (another 234 words)
StarStarStar (5)   Why are you unhappy today? by LeonG
Yesterday, the new owners of my building came over to introduce themselves. Please to meet you, they said, but you have to go. They want to combine my apartment with the other and move in themselves, they said. I told them they need to give me notice then. They said, oh, but you could give notice too. I said no, you have to give me notice. With three months notice, I have until the end of March but of course they would like me to leave sooner if possible so they can renovate. After they left, I started thinking, actually since they don't officially own the house until January, they can't actually give me notice until then which gives me until the end of April. Not that I have a problem leaving sooner though as long as I find something and if they want it sooner, at least I wouldn't… (another 23 words)
StarStar (3)   Why are you unhappy today? by plantwhisperer
Trying to make a decision in which the only two options seem like a bad choice. I've been feeling so unhappy about it all weekend, and if only I had taken a moment to think about things properly beforehand I wouldn't be in this mess. =(
StarStar (4)   Having insurance pay for vitamins by RedMidge
Agree with Franklan and John - there are certain medical conditions that require extra supplements or vitamins, and these are usually covered by your health plan/kasse. So best bet is to check with them, or ask your pharmacist.These would require a doctor's prescription. Beware of some online vitamins- check where these are produced. Also, beware that many vitamins and supplements may have interactions with prescribed medications.
StarStar (3)   Having insurance pay for vitamins by robinson100
- you do realise that you are permitted to change to another KK that might be better suited to your needs, don't you? If you are so annoyed about homeopathy, change to a KK that doesn't cover it!
StarStar (3)   New TV license fee, €17.98 a month from 01/2013 by Editor Bob
Please send €18 every month for the rest of your life to my PayPal address: You won't get anything for your money, but if you don't pay then I'll send ever more threatening letters and come knocking on your door. I will cause you lots of stress, but it's not much money so it's easier for you to just pay me.
StarStar (3)   Civilian in hiring process for US Base in Garmisch by poohsan
some/most CYS jobs requires specific education and credentials - no amount of spousal/veteran preference can get around that. despite the fact that she's well into the hiring process??? which being totally irrelevant to her is completely understandable. Or she waits until she has the job offer in hand before buying the tickets, which seems to be her plan. If she's doing paperwork, she's in the hiring process. I know a couple of single lasses who came here for CYS jobs (both have the required educational background and experience). While neither are ever going to afford a brand new Porsche, they both make enough to live alone in a decent apartment, own a VW and travel around a bit. And actually a person with SOFA status pays taxes on just about nothing (significant) locally, but… (another 15 words)
StarStar (3)   Cheaper petrol/gas prices by sosarx
Gaber, sun light falls on earth with short wave radiation. It gets transformed into lang wave radiation once it hits the ground and then gets reflected back to space. Only with the trouble that long waves have a harder time to pass the atmosphere out into space as short waves have coming from space. This alone makes life on earth possible, it guarantees a minimum temperature from non-reflected sun light. Any gas in the substance of the atmosphere has an effect. Too little CO2- it gets cold-Too much CO2- it gets too hot (through less reflected sun light). If you continue to believe that hot air from capital cities does the job- well you only keep on spreading hot air. Heiße Luft anstatt Erkenntnis. There are different schedules about how much and how fast this will effect us. That's right.… (another 26 words)
StarStar (3)   Cross-country skiing tours - Nordic ski trips by Small Town Boy
Attached imageFairly thin snow cover today but the scenery more than compensated for that. The theoretical plan for Christmas and New Year is to organise tours every Sunday and Tuesday. This however is obviously dependent on snow conditions, and as things stand it's not looking good for next weekend. Sunday 21 December Tuesday 23 December Sunday 28 December Tuesday 30 December Sunday 4 January Tuesday 6 January

Saturday 13.Dec.2014

StarStarStarStarStarStar (11)   Why are you happy today? by Cadbury
My son turned two years old today AND his baby brother learned to roll over on his stomach! Watching them be together is such a joy, although I can imagine the havoc to come. Bless.
StarStarStarStar (7)   Why are you happy today? by quietlaugh
Bought nice and inexpensive baby pram today and had a nice conversation with the previous owners Also got bathtub and a mobile, very pleased! Now I can focus on ridiculously cute baby clothes! Oh I can even geek out since Here beta was released which means I can finally toss that very old and outdated GPS!!!
StarStar (4)   Why are you happy today? by T.O. to go
Today being the first day of Christmas, I put up my Christmas tree with help of my 3yr old granddaughter with her 6 month old sister looking on wanting to join in. When we put the lights to test them they got all to decorate my walls.
StarStarStarStarStarStar (11)   Fined for insulting a bus driver by calibear
People, is it really so hard to keep the two issues at hand separate? The OP gave us some background info about what triggered the events (i.e. parking where he shouldn't have and with that royally pissing off a bus driver), but really those actions have absolutely no bearing on the judgement against him. He is accused of flipping off the bus driver, he didn't do that. The bus driver might have seen it wrong or he might have taken the opportunity to deliberately misinterpret the gesture and let off some steam. But all the hemming and hawing about what inconveniences the OPs actions might have caused a myriad of people really is completely besides the point. Newskies-sorry, I have no info to help you. But rest assured that your example will give me a chance to drive the point home… (another 78 words)
StarStarStarStarStar (10)   Why are you unhappy today? by fraufruit
I just can't seem to get in the holiday spirit this year. Too much loss last year, the year before and the year before that. This will be my first "orphan Christmas".
StarStarStarStarStar (9)   Having insurance pay for vitamins by franklan
Hi,Well, there are chronic diseases like Crohn's that may render your body unable to digest some vitamins effectively, especially A D E and K. In that case the Health insurance might pay for supplements. But without more information from the OP, I have to assume that the answer to that question is "No". Cheers Franklan
StarStarStar (6)   Having insurance pay for vitamins by westvan
That depends on a lot of things. If you have a medically diagnosed deficiency and require high doses of certain vitamins on prescription they may be covered. Contact your insurer and ask.
StarStarStarStar (7)   Doppelte Haushaltsfuehrung, main residence abroad by PandaMunich
You are not allowed to claim for leasing a car and its fuel, just for the utilities of the flat. From 1. January 2014, the flat under doppelte Haushaltsführung is allowed to cost in total a maximum of 1,000€ a month, this covers rent and utilities, not just the rent. While you're at it, don't forget the 24€ a day for Verpflegungsmehraufwand (= flat rate because you need to eat outside your home) that you are allowed to claim for the first 90 days after moving here for a job, i.e. 24€/day * 90 days = 2,160€. Tax class III and doppelte Haushaltsführung are mutually exclusive for spouses who live outside Germany: you will only get doppelte Haushaltsführung if you can show that your spouse lives at home in the UK --> you will therefore not get tax class III. As soon as… (another 319 words)
StarStarStar (5)   Translate Dryer Instructions by 2B_orNot2B
Hi poohsan I wouldn't do that if I were you. According to the Tech Data I've been reading it'd be consuming the highest Kw/h amounts in those circumstances. Sorry, but there's too much ackbarsewardness in that google translation for me to try editing it now. RedMidge is right anyway, but unfortunately User Instructions for the tumble dryer number you have are only available in German. Siemens do market virtually identical models in the UK market, only under different model numbers with a GB suffix followed by /XX where X = number. These model numbers have, for many years, been universally referred to within Bosch-Siemens Home Appliance world as E-numbers (although they have no relation to food or the EU per se). In the event you seek info, diagrams or parts in future… (another 191 words)
StarStar (4)   Car repair after accident by Sir Percy B
Sorry to sound a bit harsh, but I think that is pretty bloody selfish, if it was my son who had to drive that car I would be opting without a doubt for the new one regardless of how good an engineer can repair it and the distance I'd have to travel to get the new one. It really is a no brainer especially when I think of the safety aspect of it and the what if's that would follow.
StarStar (4)   Car repair after accident by PeterN
Only an expert who has seen the car can tell you exactly how it will need to be repaired but pulling/stretching the frame back in to shape is a standard repair technique. I'd go for the new car but take care with the dealer's special offer. At this time of year dealers have special pricing so they (or the salesmen) can meet their yearly targets. By the time the insurance company has processed the claim it may be early 2015 and the offer may be over. Try to get everything moving quickly.
StarStar (3)   Car repair after accident by sosarx
I would prefer getting a new car. I have no doubt that the repair can be done in a perfect way. But once you consider to sell it you would face problems since you would be obliged to mention the damage and that means always less potential buyers and a lower price.
StarStar (3)   Car repair after accident by garyh911
Since the car sounds like it was badly damaged and a repair is never completely perfect, plus the fact that you say you can get a new car for about the same money as you will get from the insurance company, I'd go for the new car.

Friday 12.Dec.2014

StarStarStarStarStarStarStarStarStar (17)   Fined for insulting a bus driver by pappnase
Something was bothering me about all this so I looked up the relevant bits.and in englishBut... § 194 Strafantrag says that the offence will only be prosecuted on request (so the bus driver must have complained) and § 199 Wechselseitig begangene Beleidigungen Says So perhaps OP could write back to the court with the details of the offence which he reported to the police, claim that he did not intend to insult the bus driver but that if he did it was immediately reciprocated.
StarStarStarStar (8)   Fined for insulting a bus driver by cubfan
Ugh. This thread reminds me why I rarely peruse this forum anymore. "I know I did something wrong, does anybody have any advice" is not a request to be reminded that one did something wrong. But it really is impossible for some people to resist the urge. This 4 page thread has less than 1 page of useful advice. That said, I'm sorry to say I have no advice for you, newskies. I wish you the best of luck.
StarStarStar (5)   Fined for insulting a bus driver by J0ker
ellk - You took the words right out of mouth. There are a few posters on this forum (they know who they are) who will suggest that any type of Draconian punishment is justified simply for breaking a rule. Honestly if the OP was urinating in public and got the death penalty, a few of the posters in this thread would say "What did you expect? You broke the rules and now you have to pay the piper asshole." In all honesty it's best to ignore those comments because these people are sociopaths..... As for OP - A colleague of my wife was also accused of giving the finger to a nervous driver who was honking and flashing her. Luckily she was in the car with her boyfriend, who was a witness. She took a lawyer and her boyfriend, who is black, gave his side of the story how the driver insulted… (another 171 words)
StarStarStarStarStarStarStar (14)   Long Working Hours and Family by Krieg
So, you are neglecting your family because you invest your precious time in browing the Internets????? I used to work like you ... when I was single. I used to show up to work at 10:30 or 11am, procrastinating for many hours, and then working like a clock from 5 to 9pm and then going straight for a bite and some beers. The "I am only productive during the late afternoon/night" is an excuse, I know it, you know it. After getting married and having kids I had to change that, nowadays I bring the kids to school and show up at work early and start working straight away, no procrastinating at all until the hardcore part of the day's job is done. Then I might work slow the rest of the day and go home early to pick up the kids. During the good weather days we go for a while to the… (another 36 words)
StarStarStarStar (7)   Long Working Hours and Family by AlexTr
Starmix, maybe my perspective will help. I'm married to a career woman with a 70% travel schedule. When I first got here, that wasn't the deal; however, as her duties increased with promotions, so did the amount of travel. Some things that really helped us: 1) We bought a pegboard and a huge calendar. On that calendar all travel time and late time gets marked. She is responsible for monitoring and scaling back when it starts to look a little too colorful on our board. 2) We don't have kids, but we do have a dog. On weekends, she is on the hook for the early and late walks. The middle of the day we do together. Take your turn with the kids when you are home. Take some heat off of her. 3) At one point when she was traveling 5 days/week, my wife hired a housekeeper for me. The woman… (another 176 words)
StarStar (4)   Long Working Hours and Family by bobD
To be fair, working in the so called "Knowledge Economy" or using your brain rather than your hands, it is impossible to remain 100% focussed for 8 hours non stop. There has to be breaks throughout the day. The key is making those breaks effective. A walk around the block will be more refreshing than 30 mins lost online. It can be very easy to get 'lost' online and time is suddenly gone. Think about taking a 5 minute break every hour just to get up and move around, sometimes grabbing a coffee and you will be able o better maintain the effort for the duration.
StarStarStarStarStar (10)   Why are you happy today? by robinson100
I am happy because I finally met up with an ex-colleague again today after she left the company about six months ago. When she left, I was on holiday, so I never got to give her the leaving present I had bought for her. Today we finally met up again and went for a lovely walk in the sun around Maisinger See. The Alps were shining beautifully in the sunshine and we had a great time just catching-up on what has happened in our lives these past months. When we got back to the car park, I gave her her leaving present, and she burst into tears! It was something that she had always wanted to buy for herself, but somehow never actually done - I guess fate was playing it's part in this, but who knows? Anyway, she was happy, I was happy, and a lovely afternoon was had by all!
StarStarStar (5)   The Vent by T.O. to go
lady were going to book on line, you called me and I gave you answers to your questions you decided to book with me even though I advised that I charge a fee. You asked whether you should book or wait, (ah you want to blame if you up), I responded I don't know whether or not the fare will go up, down or if space will be gone. If you are comfortable with the price and think it's worth it do it, if not don't. They have an EBB which is a saving of 250 per person, it may go up after depending on their inventory....well you booked it and then a week later you went on line and the fare went down, perhaps they didn't meet their quota and are trying to cut their losses. the went down lower and has continued to do, because people are not booking. I called the Tour Operator… (another 116 words)
StarStar (4)   How to deal with open windows in the workplace by friederike
The only sick thing is your linking a need for fresh air even in winter to gas chambers and the Holocaust. The idea of ventilation even in winter is not unheard of outside of Germany, even if you might find that hard to believe. Here's one example and here's one from Australia. Air gets stale, there is less oxygen, more humidity and the concentration of pollutants, allergens and of germs rises. So even in winter, people need fresh air, even though it's rude to be inconsiderate of coworkers' needs and it's a waste of energy to leave the windows open for a long time.
StarStar (4)   Church tax by Gwaptiva
The Freedom of Thought report compiled by the International Humanist and Ethical Union, and it lists Germany under the (second worst) category "Severe discrimination" (of people of no faith and/or atheists). It mentions blasphemy laws, the Concordat between Bayern and the Vatican See, and "privileged access" for certain groups. It highlights a few cases related to these topics, but fails to mention (but takes into account) the legitimisation of certain religious groups (over others including humanist/atheist groups) by the "assistance in levying church tax", or the preferential treatment religious organisations like Caritas or the Diakonie (their employees don't have the right to strike, a right guaranteed in the Constitution for others, etc). http://free… (another 6 words)
StarStar (3)   Civilian in hiring process for US Base in Garmisch by engelchen
I think you are really putting the cart before the horse. Before you start worrying about moving here for a job on the base, worry about securing the job on the base. I think your first questions should be on your chances of obtaining a job on base considering you have no ties to the military and whether there is anything you can do to raise them. A1 German is pretty much useless in the real world, I strongly suggest your continue learning German.
StarStar (3)   How to help somebody suffering domestic abuse by Beuel
This is a pdf with all the legal stuff It's called Gewaltschutzgesetzt. It's in German though. Another text in English By the way, I think it's much more likely they trust that she can take care of the kid's if she takes action rather than wait until things really escalate. This part might be the most important one: "Wer Opfer von Gewalt geworden ist, kann neben oder statt eines Strafverfahrens zivilrechtliche Schutzmöglichkeiten in Anspruch nehmen und Schutzanordnungen, die Zuweisung der Wohnung, Schadensersatz und Schmerzensgeld, das alleinige Sorgerecht über die Kinder, die Aussetzung oder Beschränkung des Umgangsrechts beantragen. Schutzanordnungen und die Zuweisung der Wohnung sind dabei als vorbeugender Schutz vor weiteren Gewalttaten Gegenstand des Gewaltschutzgesetzes.… (another 158 words)
StarStar (3)   Highly Skilled IT guy and Web Designer by zwiebelfisch
You posted elsewhere that you do not yet have a work permit. I think you need to get that straightened out first because it will be a minefield once people start asking for invoices and for a lot of stuff like freelance translation of graphics they are likely to do so.

Thursday 11.Dec.2014

StarStarStarStarStarStarStarStarStar (17)   Fined for insulting a bus driver by ellk
I can't get my head around the replies implying the OP deserved what happened to him. So he parked inconsiderately for a few seconds. Maybe he was "preventing the bus company from getting their customers to their destination" for a few seconds. That's what €30 parking fines are for. But €2000 plus costs? Based on a court judgement with apparently no witnesses and barely a chance to defend himself? And a law that takes sides when you flip someone off? Doesn't make me feel great about living in this country. Full sympathy to the OP and I hope you find a way to make the best of it.
StarStarStarStarStarStar (11)   Fined for insulting a bus driver by ellk
But this illustrates my point. You're piling all of society's ills on the OP when all he did was briefly stop on a bus stop in a small village. For me the story is the unbelievable disproportionality of what happened next (if what he says is accurate). By all means let's fine the guy €30 or €100 and he won't do it again. Don't fine him a months' salary. Did you get fined a months' salary the last time you irritated someone or broke a minor traffic law? The OP is being screwed and could genuinely use some help and you're projecting your issues with the rest of society onto the poor guy. His 'attitude' that got called out made a lot of sense to me, since I also thought "why the hell are these people talking about where he left his car?"… (another 5 words)
StarStarStarStarStarStar (11)   Fined for insulting a bus driver by ale3982
I didn't get the sense the OP said he was doing the right thing, or it was justified, rather giving context. The OP even admits it was wrong and has change his/her actions and is now parking in the designated parking zone. If I felt justified in my actions I would neither change them nor acknowledge that the bus driver deserved any type of notice. Perhaps I'm not reading enough into it.... It just seems that a €2000 fine for acknowledging to the bus driver that he was parked wrong and was moving the car seems out of proportion to the crime / beleidigung. I hope the OP is able to work it out with the police and bus company. Let us know how it goes.
StarStarStarStar (8)   Fined for insulting a bus driver by biffer
I agree with most of you that it is ridiculous that insulting someone can be a criminal offence in Germany. But unfortunately that's how it is... I'm guessing you have received a summary judgement ("Strafbefehl"), issued based solely on the driver's statement. This usually happens without prior hearing of the accused and is quite common. The reason for this procedure is to simplify proceedings in minor cases, as the prosecution and the courts are over-worked as it is. If you don't agree with the judgement, you have two weeks to challenge this, preferably with a statement of your own. The prosecution or the court may then drop the charges depending on your statement. Otherwise, a regular trial is scheduled. The court fees in the event of your losing the case will be… (another 55 words)
StarStarStarStarStarStar (11)   Long Working Hours and Family by fraufruit
Get a sitter and go out with your wife even if on the weekends. Perhaps you could meet up with some of her friends and do things together as couples. Get to know the husbands/partners. You could also do family outings with the "baby friends". I'm glad that you are re-evaluating your priorities. Most men wait until it is too late and the kids are grown. Women, too.
StarStarStarStarStar (9)   Long Working Hours and Family by Keleth
Up until about 2005 I would work nearly every hour going for the overtime.Had good money the end of the money,brought lots of nice things. Missed out on family life a hell of a lot. Regret that to this day,since then I've worked my 40 hour week and done overtime on the odd occassion when I wanted to not when it was expected of me. I earn a lot less now,we have a lot less "nice" stuff but it may sound like a cliche but boy am I a lot happier and relaxed now.
StarStarStarStar (7)   Long Working Hours and Family by Starmix
Hi, I work hard and long hours in the Finance sector. I am knocking on my 40's I have a wife and small kids. I am often home only at 8pm or sometimes later due to work. My wife complains of no support. She also says I have no friends. The former is unfortunately true, and I need to change my work-life balance to support her and see more of my kids than just at the weekend. The latter I had never noticed, as I am fairly well connected in the office, but I actually don't have that many close friends outside the office. Those I have, I have not seen for quite some time. Working late means I cannot go out for a beer in the evening. If I do go out I feel bad that I am again leaving my wife with the kids. What do grown men do socially other than going to the pub? I know I need to be… (another 110 words)
StarStarStarStar (7)   Long Working Hours and Family by SmittyBoy
IMHO, Working longer than 40 hours per week is simply stupid. You are NOT improving your chances of a promotion or pay-raise by doing so. You are NOT decreasing the likelihood that you will be made redundant. If you are a salaried employee, you are engaging in uncompensated overtime, in the sense that your time is your most valuable asset, and you never get back the time you have used. This opinion is based upon over 30 years of work experience, in highly competitive work environments. I have watched myself, and others, fall into the same trap. Stop now, before it has permanent effects on your health or your family.
StarStarStarStar (7)   Church tax by BadDoggie
Leaving aside for a moment the legal issues of, say... fraud, if you believe those particular myths (out of the 2000+ that comprise the world's current religious beliefs) why would you not pay your tithe as commanded? Alternatively, if you don't believe it, why would you want a wedding or funeral based in and invoking such beliefs? As for the business opportunity, why would someone sanctioned by a body which is entitled to the big payments ever settle for a one-off small payment? Think of it like GEZ but with fewer channels. woof.
StarStarStarStar (7)   Boyfriend moving in by Erdbeere07
Update for anyone in a similar position: I checked my contract which didn't specify anything ... so I wrote my landlady a letter stating that my partner was moving in on a set date, introduced him with birthdate and occupation, and asked her to let me know if there was anything in the way of him moving in on her end. She called and confirmed it was okay, no added costs etc. Thanks again for your help!
StarStarStar (6)   How to help somebody suffering domestic abuse by Beuel
If the mother is unable or unwilling to protect her children the jugendamt should take the children away. You can't force a person to accept help. There's a lot of help availiable, but she has to ask for it. What you can do is report him to the police. There's a rule "The offender has to leave". But only for a few days or something (she can look that up online). And I doubt they take you seriously if you call from Ireland and report something you haven't witnessed. ETA Found it :List of institutions or help lines
StarStarStar (6)   How to help somebody suffering domestic abuse by Tap
If she isn't willing or able to leave him, then there's not much anyone can do. She has to make that decision herself and no matter how much you may want to, you can't make her leave. You could try talking to her and pointing out the damage this could be doing to her children, but it's ultimately her decision. Unfortunately, some women don't have the strength to walk away, at least not until things get really bad.
StarStarStar (6)   Finding ANY jobs in Berlin by Illic
That is not the point. You'll be dealing with bureaucrats who only care for your papers, not for what you can do. If their rulebooks say that you need a degree than you need exactly that, even if you were the most qualified sysadmin ever. they will not call your bosses to get statements about your qualifications, they want to see the right papers/documents/certificates. Think of it this way : If you don't have a driving license, would they let you drive just because you can find ten people who vouch for your driving skills instead?
StarStarStar (5)   So Ordered: US Amnesty by Obama by BadDoggie
Wow, those are some real factual sources you got there! You do know, Jon Stewart is a comedian right?[/quote]You're not just a shitty troll in general, you're an extremely shitty political troll. Good trolls know the difference between a source citation and a comment. Good trolls know how to respond to cites with better and ideally more difficult to argue counterexamples. Good trolls know how to maintain focus. Good trolls know it's the fish on the hook that's supposed to wriggle and writhe uncontrollably, not the guy holding (or in your case, smoking) the pole. What? You're not trolling? What then, simple stupidity? Because the title is hyperbole over a complaint that's dishonest which is in a country an ocean away having nothing to do with the German focus of… (another 17 words)
StarStarStar (5)   Why are you happy today? by the.frollein
The large painting I asked a young art student to do for me was delivered tonight. It's been months since we met to talk about her doing a painting, and I hadn't seen it until tonight - we were both a bit nervous when she arrived and started unpacking it... and I love it and it looks fantastic. After it was up for about an hour, I found I couldn't imagine that space without it. After she finished it, she had it at her place for a bit, to get ready to say goodbye to it - and apparently she already has two other people who saw it there now interested in having her do something similar.