Snogging in public - Germany

Just a bit of background, I live in England and my girlfriend lives in Germany - we have been together for nearly two years. We are doing the 'long distance relationship' thing. So I guess our time is either really intense 24/7 or quite distant emails and phone calls.

Basically, we had an arguement- this was because I do not agree with snogging in public. She went onto saying I was stupid, old fashioned and prude.

How do all you feel about this? Is this a German thing? I have spoken to my girlie friends who have also agreed with my point of view. The akwardness of the situation.

I am 25 years old, I am an affectionate guy... I just dont feel tonsil tennis is suitable in restaurants, cues, generally around other people whilst they are part of the group.

Is this normal? To me snogging in public is what 16 year olds do at the school bus stop.

Is it normal for Germans to be so full on in public? She quizzed me saying when can I snog you...? It was hard to give an answer.

I explained - In a club environment, on the beach in a secluded area and obviously behind closed doors.

She spoke to her 30 year old sister about this... and she agrees with my gf.

What do you guys make of this?

I mean... i get horny.. and i love a good snog... but there is a time and a place.

Opinions please... are english people just too reserved?

I find prompting an actor for lines by shoving your tongue down their throat to be both inappropriate and counter productive.

She is right, you are all of the above. Also, if you can say "snogging" without cracking up, then you can certainly partake in a little PDA.

p r u d e.

get over it fella. if ya not interested i'll give her a kiss for ya, where is she...?

>no good without pics<

J

Gotta agree, I think it's just daft. If my girlfriend started snogging me in public i'd tell her to just grow up.

Its a public space for a reason so hold your tongue.

If the moment is right why not
But, I had a girlfriend who liked to make a big thing of public affection.
I think it was more about making a show than showing love.
It should be fun if it feels natural.
And btw I see a lot of German couples 'snogging' in public here in Berlin.
Great word-'snogging'!
Old school!

Totally agree with you, if you are wanting a SHAG THAT MUCH GET HOME!

snogging isn't shagging and if you feel it is your sex live is seriously lacking...

sure she's not after the wild, 'heat of the moment', passionate kiss. just a nice snog. nowt wrong wi that.

J

I had to witness a snogging couple getting their camera stolen in Valencia today (well, yesterday), so if you do snog in public, make sure you do not leave any cameras or wallets unattended.

I don't see anything wrong with it, as long as it's not over the top, I suppose.

Go for it. If it makes her happy, she'll make you happy...

Get in there my saan.Why not do think you are being a bit prudish.Woman wants a snog then give her a snog.

Yes, it is. All generations seem to do it.

I agree with you. But then I'm English. We could just be suffering excess reserve.

I mostly hate PDAs, although there was a very, very elderly couple in V-Markt the other day who were having a very sweet but very full on snog in among the baskets in the basement. I hope I still feel that way when I'm eight hundred years old.

Attempt to perform cunnilingus on her next time you're in the S-bahn/concert/rock-climbing ... if she gives any lip then act all flabbergasted and shout hysterically "WHAT DO YOU WOMEN WANT!!!???" .

For reference, see also the related earlier four-page discussion: Public displays of affection - please stop it!

"In public" seems a very broad term. It really does depend on both the location and the situation. For example: in Church? Not usually, but then again when you hear those magic words "you may kiss the Bride" then it isn't unusual for quite the snogging display to go on right in front of everyone and right at the altar, too! And nobody seems to object at all. Some folks in the pews even get in the spirit

Saying goodbye or hello at the airport or train or bus station seems quite normal. The longer the separation, the longer the snog. Walking in the woods or in a park holding hands and stopping for a nice smooch or snog doesn't seem all that outrageous. A little spontaneous display of affection, or even not-so-little, usually doesn't bother me at all.

On the other hand, I must say I get annoyed when a couple is snogging for a longer time and blocking the flow of foot traffic, completely oblivious to folks trying to get around them. They should at least find some place a little out of the way.

Your girliefriend has you summed up dead right - how can you describe yourself as affectionate, I really dont know - your relationship is doomed!!!
Your upper lip stiffness has spread to your brain. I think you should stay in toffee nosed britain - you really belong there.

Ouch. You are letting her command you around and insult you? Some German women are too masculine. Honestly if my partner/bf/date told me something like that I would tell him to take a hike.

Ewww, I hate seeing people snog, and yep it's what the kiddies do IMO. There are inside activities & outside activities, this is the reason our homes have walls.

I think it must have been the same couple I saw making out in right in front of Ludwig Beck's. My initial reaction was, "Jebus! Get a room- that's absolutely revolting." But the guy behind me turned to his wife and said, "Ah, look at the passion..." So for a second I felt bad about thinking it was gross. But then I came back to my senses and realized geriatrics making out in public IS gross.

Snogging is ok, if its not too intense (and includes touching private parts,et al things). I would prefer just kissing and pleasant stuff, if its in public (only exception being that I'm drunk and out of sense' - which is rare).


Berlin and Hamburg are 2 exceptions in Germany. Sometimes, the people over there dont sound like Germans (Specially when you compare those places with Bavaria).

I don't like PDAs from anyone, but it's pretty cool to think people can still be so passionate about each other when they're so very, very old. It didn't look terribly pleasant...

Unless they're a pair of contrary bastards and they don't like each other but really enjoy making out in public and freaking people out.

I totally disagree about seeing older folks kissing and cuddling as somehow gross. Perhaps it might seem that way to younger people who still refuse to believe that Mommy and Daddy ever have sex, but I always get a grin on my face when I see an older couple displaying affection. A few years ago we took my husband's parents to Canada as their 50th wedding anniversary present. Seeing them holding hands while walking along the path by Niagara Falls, and then stopping for a smooch made the whole trip worth it. I can only hope that our relationship stays so strong and loving when we reach that age.

Holding hands and a kiss are fine. Putting your arm around someone or giving them a hug to show your affection- no problem. But this couple I saw where quite literally all over each other. The guy was practically dry humping her. There's a difference to me between the two.

so now we have gone from snogging in public to dry humping

Well it is a common line of progression.

Snogging isn't something extreme!

Dictionary.com Unabridged (v 1.1) - Cite This Source - Share This
snog Audio Help /snɒg/ Pronunciation Key - Show Spelled Pronunciation[snog] Pronunciation Key - Show IPA Pronunciation
–verb (used without object), snogged, snog·ging. British Informal. to kiss and cuddle.

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[Origin: 1955–60; orig. uncert.]
Dictionary.com Unabridged (v 1.1)
Based on the Random House Unabridged Dictionary, © Random House, Inc. 2006.

Ouch! dry humping. Doesn't that make one sore?

ah the good old prude card gets played again. "prudishness" is surely individual and all relative isn't it. I mean, is your girlfriend also a prude if she doesn't approve of open bestiality bondage at the Kaufhof checkout? Why does her definition of what is ok/not ok define you as a prude and her as not a prude. Bandying around the prude card always seems a bit pathetic really when it comes to some individual views. Why on earth should it matter what her sister thinks if you arent comfortable with it anyway?

I can describe myself as affectionate because I am. Just because I do not want to snog her in public does not make me less affectionate. I am very touchy feely with her, I am romantic. "I think you should stay in toffee nosed Britain" touchy touchy.

Thank you for all the replies... I guess it's a German thing.

It's not a German thing, it might be a mainland European thing though. I dated an Italian once and snogging in public was de riguer, at first it made me a bit uncomfortable but now I quite like it. The French are big on PDA's as well.

Yeah the first European country i visited was the Czech Republic and I noticed that it was apparently unacceptable to be on an escalator with your girl and not have your hands down her pants, its actually seems relatively tame here in comparison...

No, you got it all wrong. It is the Bavarians who are the Sonderdeutschen.

Neid der Besitzlosen...

I'm guessing your girlfriend is not from the former east Germany. There it is more a question of shagging rather than snogging in public. Consider yourself to have got off lighty

For me, it much depends on the escape options of your (potential) audience. I felt acutely uncomfortable with a French ex of mine who'd get carried away on packed commuter trains, for example, because those poor people essentially had nowhere else to look! Probably a bit much before breakfast. But as long as it's not blocking the way or causing a public nuisance, I don't see anything wrong with a bit of passion if other people can move or look away if they want. You just have to be sensitive to the situation. Oh, and think of the children.

People have different boundaries though, and the whole point is that it's supposed to feel good! So if you're uncomfortable, it doesn't matter what your girlfriend's sister or all of us think, you need to talk to her about it properly and come to an agreement that's ok for you.

Is the pun intentional?

You've led a sheltered life...my child...snogging in public goes on all over the Uk - well maybe there a bit more reserved in the south due to the shandy drinking.
Just wait until your German girlfriend wants to take you to an 'saunalandschaft'.