Maybe this is the real reason the Germans rebuffed US Defense Secretary Bob Gates' request for a greater presence in Afghanistan:

The Earth Times: German Soldiers are too fat.


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Now I really feel for the Afghani's. After all they've been through you can feel a smoking ban coming on top.

They're not too fat...the Wehrbeauftragter seems to misinterpret some statistics. The Body Mass Index of the German soldiers is higher than an average civilian's BMI. That's simply because they normally are better trained and thus have more muscle mass (which in fact is heavier than fat).

It's a bit of a sweeping generalization. However, I live next to a 'special forces' German base and some of the fat gits that run past my house during training are hilarious. They also have to run in full gear with a loaded pack on their back, A lot of them are walking and smoking instead of running. I wouldn't be too concerned if the UK went to war with the Germans again, we'd only have to throw pies at them to win!

The Earth Times, which is your source for this story makes The Sun look like an intellectual broadsheet.

Most standard military forces ("territorial armý" ) are nothing but a joke. The average GI Joe knows at least a dozen ways to open a bottle of beer, but has no clue how to tie his boots, but the german army is probably the biggest joke... due to a traditional catastrophic behaviour and self-perception of the NCO ranks combined with the compulsary military service in Germany, the army is nothing more than a safe heaven for alcoholics and mischiefs who would fail in civilian life.

Oi! Wait a second! You're talkin' about some of my German friends there.

My mate Hartmut derailed a whole goods train with little more than a panzer and a six pack... or two. He's my hero.

So far it is only you who seems to fail...when it comes to giving objective statements. Compared to other nations' military forces, the German military has a high educational level. The huge majority of the soldiers is from the middle class and more than 75% of the job APPLICANTS have at least passed their "Mittlere Reife" or professional education. The Bundeswehr still can chose whom of the applicants they chose (as there are still far less jobs within the Bundeswehr than applicants available). E.g. in 2006 there were more than 13,000 applicants (with at least Fachabitur) for less than 2,000 officer candidate jobs. There are also a lot of people who have passed (Fach)Abitur and join as NCOs.. and I do not know any other military force with 90% of the officer's having an university (not a military academy) degree...

What's high education level gotta do with low body fat??? Typical dooschbag logic, if you ask me. You aren't in the Germ Army by any chance are you???

Just to detract from all the arguments.
The pic above is taken of an security guard for/outside a russian antiques
dealers. (source: me and my internet trawling)
Dont know if that takes impacts the rest of the earth times piece,
perhaps hes actually a German, and so so lost

Huh? The Abitur and the Mittlere Reife are types of high school diplomas, the former being a requirement for university study, not a university degree.

Don't German soldiers train? Like go jogging? That's one fat boy.

I just responded to the quoted post above =) Yes, I am with the German Army.


Right.. but almost every officer has to study for four years during his officer training (which in total usually lasts 6 1/2 years). Only Warrant Officers (Fachdienstoffiziere) don't need to go to the university as they are only specialists within their area of responsibility.


Of course, they usually train a lot...but after basic training you have to do a lot on your own. The "Dienstsport" is often is not very good as there is nobody who cares if you train or not. As long as you fullfill the minimum requirements every year, you won't get any problems if you do only little sport. You just have to do two 30km marches, get 15 points in your physical fitness test (which is quite easy) and get your Deutsches Sportabzeichen (also very easy). So there of course are some black sheep who don't do that much sport...but the majority is definitely well-trained.

The guy wears russian camouflage.

@OSINT, so that clears up the mystery of you not indulging in the TT national sport of deutscher bashing.

Well anyway the German army can't be up to much, they are not really a fighting army are they? I mean Afghanistan is an accident, other than that, they weren't really expected to go to war with France or Austria... They don't seem to have won any war in a long time(have they ever??). Plus most professional armies have a strong and healthy aversion to draftees, and no Army that would actually expect to fight would use that kind of rabble (unless they have to, due to a small population like the Israelis or Swiss)

So the army is for show and i guess the soldiers know it, that would also explain the deluge of slackers to the army. The higher education fits too, I mean the officers have to do something to pass the time, till they get to their pensions and i guess the army rules restrict drinking to the evenings.

Well if German soldiers are fat and smoke too much its only coz they got nothin better to do.

(not the officers though, as OSINT points out, they have high education, talk about 'sturm und drang' and write lousy poetry too]

Der 1st Schwere Pastetten Battalion (Billy Butlers Own)
Motto: Wir haben die Pastetten gestohlen!

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being of dual nationality i had a great time in the German airborne. there is a huge difference between the "fighting force" and the rest (logistics, admin. etc.) the non-fighting troops do tend to bloat and in the case of our battalion got a kicking from time to time from the commander (who i think didn't care much just that the fatsos did there desk job well). the rest of us were in real good condition (me 75kg and muscle + 25kg equip. and not to forget my G3/G36) and yes we did run like that but it was disappointing to see a 120kg dude walk around with a (dark)red beret.

On another note: I trained with the 82nd and about 1/3 could not even swim (big black dudes crying cause they were inching along the edge of the pool with there instructor stepping on there fingers )

They have won plenty of battles alright, but as regards winning wars... was the Franco-Prussian War the last one a German army won?

Hey bellyflyer isn't that a russian uniform?

Yeah, that was the last one were not the whole world was fighting against Germany.

What way would you have run the army if you were the big C-in-C during WWII Dr Love? What would you have done differently to prevent the whole world ending up in war against you?

man, beats me, someone edited my original post and added that foto and the quote above it...

This might gonna go into a very long thread (hint: don't mention the war)
But if you insist.
Well, first off I would not have given a blanque cheque so to speak in supporting the austrians blindly whatever they were goin to do to 'punish' the serbians (heir to the austro-hungarian throne was
assassinated by serbian 'terrorists' in 1914). Let them (the austrians) sort it out as it is in their reich.