Zurika told me about this and, well, she was going to post it herself but she's gone now, so...
http://www.raptureletters.com/
It's a website to send off emails to your loved ones should you disappear in the Rapture. Yeah, that one, where Jesus comes again and takes all the good people up to heaven and everyone else is Left Behind. Like those books that are apparently very popular in the US. Now what the website offers is apparently the final I Told You So: you register and put in all the email addresses of all your friends. The guy who runs it has to report in to the computer every day by say 11 am, type in some secret code that means "I'm still here so the Rapture obviously hasn't come yet", or else the website automatically sends off emails to everyone.
Probable subject line: You are receiving this message because the rapture has come and you are a heathen.
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Email from after the Rapture
Sign up for the final "I told you so" to friends
Repent now, heathens!
Have a nice day.
Have a nice day.
Urk, now I've gotten the email! Anyone else? Title updated accordingly...
QUOTE
Dear Friends,
This message has been sent to you by a friend or a relative who has recently
disappeared along with millions and millions of people around the world.
The reason they chose to send you this letter is because they cared about
you
and would like you to know the truth about where they went.
This may come as a shock to you, but the one who sent you this has been
taken
up to heaven.
If you read a Bible, you will see that after chapter three in the book of
Revelation,
the church is no longer mentioned as being on earth. (The church are the
believers
in Jesus Christ, not the buildings in which people meet.)
In the Bible, 1 Thessalonians Chapter 4 verses 16 and 17 tell how Jesus came
to take away His church. But, you have to believe the Bible is the Word of
God in order to believe this.
I am sure that there will be a lot of speculation as to what happened to all
these people. The theories of some scientists and world leaders will have
so much credibility that most of the world will believe them.
It will sound like the truth!
But, there is only one truth. And, that truth is that Jesus Christ, God in
the flesh,
came back to earth and took with Him to Heaven all who believed in Him
and made Him their Lord.
If you would like to give your life to Jesus Christ and be born again, it is
not too late. First you must pray to God saying"Father I admit I am a
sinner, and I will turn from my sin and do good. I believe that Jesus was
your son and that He came here to die for me so that my sins would be
forgiven. I ask you to forgive me and I will repent of my sins. In Jesus
name I pray."
If you just prayed that prayer and meant it with all your heart, then God
will know you as one of His own. You should now seek out others who have
also given their lives to Christ, read a Bible daily, and do your best to
bring others to Christ.
God bless you.
This message has been sent to you by a friend or a relative who has recently
disappeared along with millions and millions of people around the world.
The reason they chose to send you this letter is because they cared about
you
and would like you to know the truth about where they went.
This may come as a shock to you, but the one who sent you this has been
taken
up to heaven.
If you read a Bible, you will see that after chapter three in the book of
Revelation,
the church is no longer mentioned as being on earth. (The church are the
believers
in Jesus Christ, not the buildings in which people meet.)
In the Bible, 1 Thessalonians Chapter 4 verses 16 and 17 tell how Jesus came
to take away His church. But, you have to believe the Bible is the Word of
God in order to believe this.
I am sure that there will be a lot of speculation as to what happened to all
these people. The theories of some scientists and world leaders will have
so much credibility that most of the world will believe them.
It will sound like the truth!
But, there is only one truth. And, that truth is that Jesus Christ, God in
the flesh,
came back to earth and took with Him to Heaven all who believed in Him
and made Him their Lord.
If you would like to give your life to Jesus Christ and be born again, it is
not too late. First you must pray to God saying"Father I admit I am a
sinner, and I will turn from my sin and do good. I believe that Jesus was
your son and that He came here to die for me so that my sins would be
forgiven. I ask you to forgive me and I will repent of my sins. In Jesus
name I pray."
If you just prayed that prayer and meant it with all your heart, then God
will know you as one of His own. You should now seek out others who have
also given their lives to Christ, read a Bible daily, and do your best to
bring others to Christ.
God bless you.
This is scary stuff - anyone heard from Zurika??
That email actually came from her actual email address. That's one clever website to do that. I didn't think she'd signed herself up for it though!
QUOTE (Gen @ Feb 29 2008, 10:59 am) 
but she's gone now, so...
Spooky.
Is she just messing with us? I am spooked out!
Well everybody seems to be here at work, I never knew I worked with such a bunch of heathens. Actually one of my colleagues was just telling me about his daughters upcoming confirmation, I guess I should tell him not to bother.
QUOTE (PostRaptureZurika @ Feb 29 2008, 11:10 am)
Repent now, heathens!
Have a nice day.
Have a nice day.
HEAVEN IS IN AFRICA - what gives??
Who knew, right?
She seems to be in Africa now. I have nothing against Africa but I didn't realise that these days it was so heavenly that the (en)raptured would end up there.
Edit: PRZ has just confirmed that there's internet access in heaven, so all is well. No need to give up TT.
Edit: PRZ has just confirmed that there's internet access in heaven, so all is well. No need to give up TT.
Truth be told, Toytown just doesn't list "heaven" as a location option...
Dear PostRaptureZurika,
What is heaven like - since all the heathens are here with us - who's with you? Do they speak German in Heaven?
What is heaven like - since all the heathens are here with us - who's with you? Do they speak German in Heaven?
You just need to select Bayern.
She updated her blog on Wednesday...
So heaven has broadband?
Yay! I´m there!
Yes, naturally we have broadband here. So far it's just me, John Stewart, and Jesus, but he assures me that the others will be arriving any minute now.
QUOTE (Renia @ Feb 29 2008, 11:28 am)
Yay! I´m there!
In Heaven?
In Bavaria. Same thing.
I'm rather surprised by John Stewart's departure, I didn't think he was that holy either.
I'm rather surprised by John Stewart's departure, I didn't think he was that holy either.
The lord umzugs in mysterious ways.
1) Wasn't this posted already?
2) Wouldn't sending this nany-nany-boo-boo email disqualify you for Heaven automatically?
2) Wouldn't sending this nany-nany-boo-boo email disqualify you for Heaven automatically?
bible bashing chain mail!
QUOTE (PostRaptureZurika @ Feb 29 2008, 11:10 am)
Repent now, heathens!
Have a nice day.
Have a nice day.
I'm no authority on this bible nonsense, but if the rapture has happened, isn't a bit late for the rest of us to be repenting?
It's like on the Orient Express or other dining trains: Second service.
Heaven is where...
The police are British
The cooks are Italian
The lovers are French
The mechanics are German
And it's all organized by the Swiss
Hell is where...
The cooks are British
The mechanics are French
The lovers are Swiss
The police are German
And it's all organized by the Italians
The police are British
The cooks are Italian
The lovers are French
The mechanics are German
And it's all organized by the Swiss
Hell is where...
The cooks are British
The mechanics are French
The lovers are Swiss
The police are German
And it's all organized by the Italians
I'm sure they'll be a Rapture part 2 coming soon!
'Rapture 2, this time it's personal'
QUOTE
Ninety percent of all donations we receive are used to further the kingdom of God
Prove it.
Eh, what?
Seek, and ye shall find, Allershausen. It's in here:
http://www.raptureletters.com/
Edit: I wasn't asking you to prove it personally- it was aimed at Mr/Ms Raptureletters.
http://www.raptureletters.com/
Edit: I wasn't asking you to prove it personally- it was aimed at Mr/Ms Raptureletters.
"After the rapture, there will be a lot of speculation as to why millions of people have
just disappeared. Unfortunately, after the rapture, only non believers will be left "
Looks like apartment prices will be coming down soon then? This is indeed good news, coupled with the fact that no more God Botherers will be banging at your new big, cheap apartment asking if they can speak to you about god and stuff!
just disappeared. Unfortunately, after the rapture, only non believers will be left "
Looks like apartment prices will be coming down soon then? This is indeed good news, coupled with the fact that no more God Botherers will be banging at your new big, cheap apartment asking if they can speak to you about god and stuff!
No, unfortunately the Jehovas witnesses will still be around!
Dang!
That's ok, they don't drink, meaning we can get tables at the Oktoberfest any time we want.
Phew!
QUOTE (Uncle Nick @ Feb 29 2008, 2:28 pm)
No, unfortunately the Jehovas witnesses will still be around!
Well they don't believe in medical intervention either so maybe we can poison em all
It just gets better!
Thats why its the rapture.
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