Vote for your favorite posts of 2007

Nah man, just kids trying to look gansta. Quick tip, if you see a gang of youths coming towards you with their hoods up and shit, just gently sidestep one pace to the left - hoodies actually give you a relatively limited field of vision, so you'll have essentially rendered yourself invisible to them.
Anyway, I don't see these kids as thugs, they're just trying to look cool and hard and bad, thats all. Never really seen any kids of any ehtnic persuasion doing much trouble causing over here to be honest, krout, turk or otherwise.

I have not ever really experienced many Germans slagging off turkish people, but in fairness, I don't hang out with many Germans. We had a party once, and my bird invited some friend or other, and her husband. He was mid thirties I guess, bavarian, came across as well educated, well set financially, but a twat. I'd never met the bloke, he came in, and started ranting about the taxi driver being foreign. Now I do like a rant; doneright, they're good comedy. Wanna throw some racism in? Well, for comedy, I personally don't see why not. This shit though, was clearly not meant to be comedy atall. Was just a boring rant about the taxi driver being turkish. Why? I did not get it atall. Was the taxi late? Did he drive badly? Did his car smell of ass? Nope, seemingly his crime was that he spoke to somebody on the phone in turkish. Un-fucking-real.
I just loved it that a german bloke, who's mother tongue is one of the most unattractive sounding languages in the world, moaned about a bloke speaking turkish.

It's possible you are sharing a circuit with someone else. As the boom in new phone lines erupted in the 70's and as people added multiple lines for extra phones and faxes in the 80's there were not enough PAIRs of wires into a building to support all the required circuits, so Telekom developed a clever trick whereby 2 circuits shared 3 wires, where previously 4 would have been needed. This allowed them to increase density of circuits, especially in older multi-occupancy buildings. Prior to this they had used relay switches to alternate pairs, but this would never have worked with ISDN. Now you are moving to a new provider you must have your own exclusive circuit, so they will need to re-jig the wires and give a unique pair to Alice.

It might also be Telekoms way of extracting more money for the connection and loss of customer from Alice (which won't affect your charges)

If you have an appointment on Monday then there is a 50% or less chance they will be there, since Telekom service announced random and lightning strikes, especially affecting the service organisation from today.

YL6

She reckons its going to take her 500 days. Thats 80 blow jobs a day. Lets say each blow job takes 5 minutes. Thats 400 minutes a day of sucking cock. The average penis length (as measured by staff) is around 13 cm. She does 50 head bobs a minute which go the entire shaft as she's a deep throating slag, which means she will do 250 head bobs for each guy. That's a total of 3,250cm of cock per person. That's about 650 cmpm (centimeters of cock per minute). In the 500 days she will have sucked a total of 1,300 Km of cock.

That's what happens if you try to pass the Dutchie on the left hand side.

Jeremy - your father-hole is nearing alignment with Uranus on the 24th June. You should be able to find it using an old pair of binoculars, an awkwardly angled mirror and some sticky tape.

Jeebus, this is still going on? I'm disappointed none of the arm chair psychologists have suggested that perhaps if someone were to feel underappreciated and/or undervalued in their role as a primary caregiver perhaps they should be having this discussion with the significant other and a trained therapist rather than seeking drunken validation from the internet. Then the romantics would suggest demands for flowers and chocolates, a romantic dinner and a spa treatment. Then the cheapskates would say bah don't bother, just go for a footy match and a bit of oral action. Preferably simultaneously. Then there would be some outrageous tangents during which don riina would bring up Wars, twats and vegetarians. Then we would debate on whether or not Twats should be capitalised and someone would point out the missing comma between T/twats, and vegetarians. Oy and no one has mentioned the importance of either SPF whilst gardening OR blasted the fact that beef doesn't grow on trees. All in all very disappointing I must say, and yes, I quite think it is the modertors. Here's a lesson to you kids, never post up a topic and ask for deletion after the fact. If it's remotely entertaining to the masses, it aint going to happen. If its deleted then yes that just their way of saying your TMI ramblings aren't worth the internet ink, so in a way one should be flattered if one's topic isn't deleted upon request. You just cant win with those moderators really. Whores the lot of them, well just the beefy ones really.

Anyhoo, back on topic, let me get this straight. DW hates all of us, except me naturally, and anyone with at least 64 chirren AND/OR a father hole that sets on uranus can be elite. aschaffenburgerboy-o, I'll have that cookie now, to go please as I've got a short bus to catch and windows to lick.

Right I'm posse'd up and ready to go. Bloke on the right is gonna check out the gay tents, and the one on the left is gonna finish off any half-eaten chickens whilst he looks.

Jesus H. Riina, this board has turned to complete and utter shit.
A thread about faggots AND Iran, and hardly anybody has stepped up to the plate with some gags or decent comments. Fuck me people, what is wrong with you?! No snide comments like "how would an Iranian man know he was gay, the women all have beards too", nobody mentioning how shit IRan is, and that gays or not, the whole coutnry shold be nuked, and no naive 21 year old american girl comments like "I think everyone should have the right to diversity, because I support diversity. Foreign cultures are so diverse. World peace. Yay."

Instead, we have some fuckwit cocking on about 'the truth' with all the command of the English language of Borat. I speak truth, yes, you like me? Dignifiy woman make belly lump after sexy time. Chenqui.

Go away all of you, and don't come back unless you have something decent to write, preferably peppered with some quality racism, maybe a nice dash of sexism, and a good lavish dose of swearwords. You're fucking rubbish, all of you.

You obviously do not have a three-legged cat that can open closed doors.

This is easily the gayest thread I have ever seen. 70's era roller skates, rainbow wig and neon pink hot pants gay.

Fact: America is the greatest country in the world.

Fact: Americans hate people who live in other countries because they are all stupid. If people in other countries were smart, they'd move to America. But then they'd be Americans and by definition, no longer stupid.

Fact: Americans ask people about their finances for two reasons: 1) America is the richest country in the world and we like to flaunt it and 2) other countries practice some gay form of socialism which is much stupider than capitalism and we're only trying to point out how stupid and gay people in other countries are.

Fact: Diversity is stupid. Everyone should think and act like Americans, or else just think and act like rich, white men in whatever country they're in, because rich, white men are most likely to think like Americans. Everyone else is stupid.

Fact: America refers to The United States of America, not Canada or Mexico or Peru or some other stupid, gay country in the western hemisphere. You know exactly what I mean when I say America unless you're from one of those stupid countries, in which case, you're too stupid to understand.

Fact: If you're not American, none of this will make any sense to you. Despite that, don't get pissed off, or irritated or uppity, otherwise we will invade you and steal your oil to cook our french fries that we stuff into our fat faces because we're the wealthiest country in the world, with the most food and we don't care what you think.

Super Timmeh, I'm so happy for you both. You seem well matched...

Just Timmeh is ok, I'm not a superhero until 8pm weekdays

I got into a BMW taxi once. It was not comfortable.

probably cos that massive chip on your shoulder meant you couldn't lean back into the seat properly.

Sin, I didn't know you also did Johnny Cochran impersonations.

I don't know who Johnny Cochran is, so he must be impersonating me.

Sorry Fribble. You are out of your league. Just stop typing. You are embarrassing yourself. If everything that's come out about your whinghey white bread ass wasn't true you wouldn't be so hot to defend yourself and the the rest of your bitches. The more you protest the more you prove me right. So type on, or shut the fuck up. Either way, I win and you whinge.

Don't apologize; I certainly don't. As an elitist, I freely encourage those with lesser mental and emotional endowments to express themselves, even though the result is somewhat inconsequential to the advancement of humankind, and often rather silly. I am quite sure that my bitches will back me up on this at our next khaki pants and SUVs luncheon, and we will all be rather mock offended at your language and yet secretly turned on at the aggression we've managed to provoke in the lower classes. Sex that evening with our white collar husbands will be divine. I for one might even go on top.

What would Jebus do?

Weep, he always does.

I am an Englishman with an irish father and an English mother, born in England.
Does that make me irish english?

No, that just makes you're a "son of a bitch that can drink like a fish".

... using an old magnifying glass I have been able to make out what looks like a scrotum and a shrivelled penis.

I'm happy for you Garibaldi. Could you also check the wasp...

[pedeant on]
...
[pedeant off]

[pedant]
It's "pedant", not "pedeant".
[/pedant]

every time I go bowling I seem to get very drunk. why?

Do you happen to be drinking alcohol when you go bowling? That may be why.

Mind you, wouldn't see that happening in P1.

No cuz you dont need a torch there to see the arseholes.

I haven't enjoyed a topic so much for a long time. Bank details and food puns.

Take time to read the nominees, culled from hundreds,

Not sure if I've missed something, but may one respectfully inquire by what process the culling took place? Mods' selection? Sarabyrd's personal favourites? Other? Just so it's clear what we're voting for.