Being an obsessive worrier

I think people generally fall into two categories.

1) people who are calm all the time. can win the lotto or have something bad happen to them, but they wont be phased and wont trouble their sleep or be up nor down

2) people who get very happy at trivial things, compliments or something, same people who feel like they have hit rock bottom when moderately bad stuff happen.

i think i am the latter, and worry about ridiculus stuff. i know things always work out in the end but i cant help myself.

not sure why i posted this, just interested in how people deal with good and bad things. thoughts? worrying is pointless, but people do it right?

i think its better to be 2), live for the highs and all that.

god i'm bored

Yeah i can tell you'r bored, me too but for what it's worth, i'm a 2 too. Or should that be a tutu?

i told you before please dont post photos of me on this website

seriously, im interested to know how people dont let big worries dominate their life? how they go to bed and dont ponder on stuff when everything is quiet and no distractions? how you say to yourself "ffs just do this work or whatever, forget about the bad stuff"?

just keep yourself busy and you'll forget about your worries.

According to the Mathäser review of Troy, Achilles was the "greatest worrier" of his time. Apparently he delt with it by building a huge wooden horse.

loads of trees outside, but i'm struggling with tools.

build a wall like Pinky
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZE2t6HWmquc

Pick up a copy of this book:

Stop worrying and start living-Dale Carnegie

I find that biting my toe nails helps.

Just ordered

Worrying is part of being Scottish really.
Keeping busy, making sure you do enough sport that you go to bed physically tired (the head will follow), doing things that put you in control (as folk tend to worry about things they can't) and if you think it has got out of hand or you have physical symptoms like stomach problems, a check with your doctor might be in order.
Anxiety doesn't have to be a way of life, here's some great information on the topic from the UK charity Mind.

Funny that, I thought it was more common in scotland too, and not just saying that!

in that i cant do any sports right now, cant even have a nice relaxing couple of beers, there is not a lot i can do...?

good link. cheers.

i bet i'll worry less when celtic v milan is over

you can also ask your Hausarzt if he can prescribe you herbal supplements which can calm you down.

I tend to worry a lot as well... I actually have that book by Dale Carnegie but haven't read it. I am pretty positive and optimist but can get very pessimist especially when more than one thing happens at once, and then it's usually just a downward spiral until things get better again.

good start as books won't help.

Mariposa - What is it exactly you worry about?

Life is too short to spend time worrying about something in the future that is not here yet.

If you recognise the pattern of behaviour, it is possible to change it or at least be better able to deal with it.
Not everyone is able to see the problem though.
On a lighter note, my brother maintains that following a knock, I become Bernard.
Rejection


He may not be wrong.

dunno if you are talking to me or mariposa, but - work and the deadlines i dont think i can meet but if i dont im screwed, that i f&*ked up an exam and i need to pull it out the bag this year to get a good grade, where im going in life as i dont have the first idea, paying off my student loan, being in my overdraft, a girl, not making it into a team in january which i wont find out till then and not being able to go to gym and work towards this is irritating the f&*k out of me, that i sometimes wish i was at home, that few of my worries will disappear or can actually disappear before a certain time months and months from now, that i could have done things better or if i'd been more self motivated years ago i wouldnt have these concerns, etc.


easier said than done. and if it is here?

I am actually very aware of my shortcomings, but just the awareness does not solve things, it also does not provide a path to solve things. So I know abut it, and I can recognize behavior patterns but breaking them is a whole lot more difficult.

Fair question.

I don't spend any of my energy worrying about anything as worrying for me is a very passive past time. What I do if I'm concerned about something is this: either make a decision, or take a stand, or take some kind of action if necessary, or write in my journal or simply give whatever the concern is to the universe to let it take care of itself.

Bloody hell ! think of what you have going for yourself and stop bloody whinging jeeeeeeees begin with fresh drinkable water and take it from there

I think worrying can really become a way of life, if you let it. Just like fear. It has NOTHING to do with boredom...

Put some positive spin on it. Its not worryinging its working out possible future problems. And act accordingly. Much better to worry and have a plan B than go "la la la" and whack you get dicked, stand around like a spare part for a couple of years and wonder what happened. Having lots on your plate can be very tiring, and sometimes very confusing. Filter out that which you can control and change, and that which you cant. I guess thats the experienced bit, and why guys who are 60 are the people who should be getting more jobs in the world!. Work out a plan for what happens when it doesnt happen. Is it that bad? Prioritise them in the objective cold light of day.
If I took your list.

Girl - no control, she either understands she's going to be in the back seat for a bit or she can use the door. Your young and the sea is rather overbrimming with them.
Exam - in your hands only. Most important thing. Without this your going to be blocked.
Team and fitness thereof - has to go down the list. You will not make the team and even if you did your inability to be 100% fit will frustrate the shit out of you and you'll play like an icecream in the sun. Accept it aint going to happen this year. Can you make it next year? Can you make the bench etc.
Deadlines. Chew the elephant in small pieces. Set out small tasks to do daily. Not weekly. Then build up from there as you've picked the lower hanging fruit you can move upwards.

Most of all be positively selfish. Smile and help people alot.

As to scots being worriers, thats another thread in itself.

You've really got only two things in life to worry about: you're going to heaven or burn in hell.
If you're going to heaven, you've nothing to worry about.
If you're going to burn in hell, you'll be too busy shaking hands with friends to worry.

I am now feeling concerned that I do not worry enough. What should I do?

i would worry about it if i were you

That's also my approach to these things. But what can you do for yourself to stop worrying if you don't have any chance of doing something because the options are out of your control or limits of power.


Maybe I should try to start a journal. But what to do if things really get out of proportion? For example to deal with life or death situations?

i'm not sure what you mean, are you talking about someone who is very ill and you are worried about them?

yes

I think you need to call upon your best friends/partner/family and support each other and keep lots of contact with them. Let them know how you are feeling and how you will need them and them uptodated on the current situation.

Keep believing and keep the faith mate, lots of deep breaths and above all knowing you will deal with things better and be of greater support for that person if you remain calm and supportive.

My missus worries about everything...if she gets a spot then its probably cancer until proved otherwise - if someone she knows is ill then she`s bound to start simulating - if she won the Lotto she would worry about someone stealing or robbing her. If I sneeze then I am most definitely seriously ill and what is she going to do when I just up and die on her.!

Me on the other hand...if I have a problem that doesn`t demand my immediate attention - I throw it into next week. Funnily enough, a lot of the time, a solution will come up during now and next week. I have this theory that its something to do with detaching yourself from the problem and therefore being able to see options that you would otherwise not have seen. Sometimes the more you concern yourself with a problem the bigger it becomes and you end up not seeing the wood for the Trees. Another very good book on positive thinking is "The Rules of Life" - full of those things that deep down you really know but need to read or be told.

Im a pretty optimistic person - not to the point of being blue eyed...
I always hope for the best and plan for the worst
most of the time this works for me