Self-employed foreigners' networking club

Having recently become self-employed, am wondering if there is something like a self-employed foreigners network/club where ideas, frustrations etc. can be exchanged

You should have a look at www.xing.com
An international networking platform with different groups

Or try the freelancers lunch. It's mostly German, but is open to English-speakers. The topic I've linked is old. But don't worry, the group is still active.

basically it boils down to the following points.

1. Fuck the Finanzamt. Earn too little, they dont believe you. Earn too much, they take it all away.

2. We're way better than those idiots working as festangestellten

3. Customers are idiots.

who needs lunch?

thank you for your replies - will give it all a try!!

If you don't find any such group that fits with what you're looking for, feel free to start your own. See: How to organise an event for tips.

You need to maintain a stoical sense of humour when doing business in this country. I find generally that staff and suppliers are reliable, prices of warehousing and offices reasonable, etc. But anything connected with the Zoll, Finanzamt or other government institution is a big old "Whooooooooaaaaaaah - we're gonna get shafted".

If you are naturally anal, or an accountant (same thing), or love paperwork then it will all be dandy. But if you just wanna get on with life and sell some widgets be ready to get some grief.

p.s. Johnnies Top Tip: Buy yourself a nice big fat company stamp. If they start giving you a hard time just photocopy 10 times more information than they requested, stamp and sign it all a couple of times, and they will be happy and go away.

I've always found self-employed people (like myself) way too fucking busy to have regular gatherings. For example...I've worked every day for the last 12 days...this is normal...at least I can pay the rent, I suppose.

Spot on berny, spot on...

My personal favourite Finanzamt trick was when you register and they say "Please estimate your profit for the next 2 years". So you stick a rough tail on the donkey, and next thing you get is a tax bill. I'm like "Whooooaaahhh there boys - I ain't even sold a single widget yet, I might make a huge fucking loss for all I know".

Oh yeah and the "VAT return within 10 days of the month end, EVERY MONTH" is also a nice one. Happy fucking holidays to you guys as well.

Not so funny as it may seem. A Company Stamp is a requirement to even be a company in the first place. Having recently signed a contract requiring a stamp (the vendor would not accept the contract without it) and having lost mine, I simply cobbled together a Photoshop graphic, overprinted it on the bottom of the contract and passed it on. Happy vendor and contract complete.

You know you can ask for a permanent extension ("Dauerfristverlängerung")? You have to pay a certain amount in advance, but you get an additional month every month.
The law: §§ 46-48 UStDV
The form looks like this (this one is for 2003):
http://www.bundesfinanzministerium.de/lang...icationFile.pdf

We know. But 'cos you are still forced to do it every month regardless, doesn't really make a huge difference frankly. And as the buggers normally owe me a load of cash, it is probably better to do it quicker.

Within the first 6 months we got tax zoll inspections, vat inspections, tax bills. They are always driving you bonkers about something.

It is currently the "Stiftung Elektro-Altgeräte Register" that are trying to make me lose my sense of humour. You cannot phone them. They don't take calls. They take 10 days on average to answer an email. Designed to drive you frigging mental. Then they ask you for something that does not appear as a request on any website, or any paperwork - just a new piece of bollox they decided to make up.

I cant deny that bureaucracy in germany is a pain in the ass and tax laws are complex and irritating. But relating to Zoll and VAT inspections, they have a good reason to be very careful. Organized crime steals billions of EUR every year with the help of "normal" businessmen, who sometimes dont even know they are part of a fraud. (Damage for the honest tax payers in germany alone approx. 17 to 18 Mrd EUR in 2005) The so called "Karussellgeschäfte" often include someone who exports goods to other EU countries and gets more VAT back than he pays.

This "Stiftung" I dont know, but private organizations who are allowed to substitute public institutions are often the worst. I remember trying to contact associations whose (full-time) employees seemed to work less than 3 hours a day.