German taboos

There are varying explanations for the origin of taboos. While some explanations are anthropological and explain taboos using history and cultural experiences, other explanations are psychoanalytical and explain taboos as an unconscious phenomenon passing through generations.

There is always a strong inclination in a taboo. State origins and causes if you know any.

Analyze the taboo behaviour, highlighting strong unconscious motivations driving such prohibitions.

One German taboo I have heard of is

“Never mention the word mistress�

sssssshhhhhhhhh!!!

What German taboos do you know?

Are you living with them or not?

There must be some cultural taboo about properly teaching the difference between "by" and "until" to Germans learning English. Because *everyone* makes this mistake. Basically every German I've talked to. When I explain that "bis" has two options in English, they all say the same exact thing. "Really? I had NO idea!"

I'd like to see that taboo lifted so they can fix the textbooks, until next month, please.

Well as far as I can tell you can discuss fist-farking and water sports in polite company in Germany...but mow your farking grass at the wrong hour and they'll be calling in an armored division.

The need to have a hot/stuffy train, bus, ubahn full of people because opening the windows for fresh air will sure as hell kill all onboard.

Nice idea gringo - talking about taboos seems to be a bit of a taboo among Americans though. Looks like they just do the usual bitching instead.

The difference is taught in German schools, though not very extensively. As you pointed out the very concept does not exist in the German language, so it's hard to grasp for a German, just like different cases and grammatical genders don't exist in English and - shock horror - *every American/Brit etc.* makes mistakes there. In any case most Germans don't need perfect English for their jobs/every day life, so don't expect everybody to come up to your high standards just because you've chosen to live here.

Liitle Sprite das ist blödsinn.If you are going to learn something learn it properly.And as to high standards i can say that the German Volk likes to think it has higher standards than other countries in Europe.If the text books are wrong they should be changed, it is a pavement in English and not a sidewalk.Chips are fried potatos and not served in a plastic bag.

In this context it's "Bevölkerung", not "Volk". If you try to use German, do it properly. Also it's "little" not "liitle" - if you type, do it properly. Also it's "Blödsinn", not "blödsinn"...and so on. People make mistakes and that includes you, so get off your high horse. Learning English properly takes a very long time and a lot of dedication. You should be glad that most Germans speak some English - it makes things a lot easier for foreigners (like you) who live here.

I'm not saying that the text books here are perfect, but that's got nothing to do with the examples you quoted:

Definition of "Pavement" From Merriam-Webster:

"pavement

Main Entry: pave·ment
Pronunciation: 'pAv-m&nt
Function: noun
Etymology: Middle English, from Anglo-French, from Latin pavimentum, from pavire
1 : a paved surface: as a : the artificially covered surface of a public thoroughfare b chiefly British : SIDEWALK"

Which means that in standard English pavement is a synonym to sidewalk. You may not be familiar with this, but it's still standard English. Maybe you can write to the editors of Merriam-Webster about it?

"Chips" is the German word for "crisps" - it's natural that people get confused there. I learned in school that the English word is "crisps" - that's in the textbooks - but it takes an extra effort to avoid "false friends".

Und jetzt würde mich wirklich interessieren, wie gut Dein Deutsch ist. So wie Du Dich hier aufspielst, kann man ja meinen, dass Du mindestens zehn Sprachen fließend sprichst...

Hey Mik, next time you are in America please walk on the pavement.

I don't want to hijack the thread, so could somebody please PM me the difference? I am victim... Thanks so much!

I thought this TT website was for English-speaking foreigners in Germany. Why,then, are there German "Besserwisser" on here making snide comments about Americans?

The comments are not snide enough in my opinion.

It's actually for English-speaking people and the requirement is for the members to speak English fluently, that is at a native or near-native level. Please don't start this discussion again... that is what other topics specifically for this discussion are for.

Mik Dickinson's German is not perfect from what I have seen (in the Translation topic), so yes, he should hardly be complaining about German people's English (especially subtler differences like until/by), as most Germans have not had the advantage of living in an English-speaking country for years, unlike him (and yet he still doesn't get everyhting right *gasp*), and depending on which English-speaking country you are in, it is pavement and chips, and Mik may complain as long as he wants but it will not make all Germans learn and speak British English. I sure don't and most likely never will.

As much as I enjoy all this bickering, back to the topic at hand:

It's taboo in Germany to wish someone a happy birthday before the date of their actual birthday.

Lunchtime at work: It's impolite to start before everyone has arrived with their tray. And don't forget, someone has to say "Mahlzeit!" and get a couple of replies before the first forkful.

Cutting up your meat first, then eating with just the fork. I know it's the American way of doing it, but here it's a big no, especially in situations where manners really matter.

snails and vegamite, even not together.

Mariposa, cutting up all your meat and then eating it just with the fork is not polite in the States, either. Another taboo is giving gifts for a child before it is born. No baby showers here...

Exactly. This is another gross misconception Germans have of Americans -- that they have atrocious table manners. Maybe some of them do, but most of us are just as civilized as the average European. I've yet to see any American cut their meat into pieces first before eating it.

Average manners are atrocious. Stand above the cut. And get that hand out of your lap.

I am speaking from experience, not making this up. My ex had pretty bad table manners, and many people I have come across in the States do as well.

Table manners are usually a function of upbringing rather than national culture. Most of the German females my fellow US servicemembers consorted with when I was a servicemember here had bad manners, period. That is not the case for my German in-laws, friends, and acquaintances.

There is a clear cultural difference in table manners: the fork in right hand method used in the US would be considered very poor manners in Europe. If people know that that's what Americans do they'll get a pass, but not many people do know in my experience.

But, Wheel, the fork-in-the-right-hand method is just a gross misconception Germans have of Americans... and apparently English do as well.

Someone tell that to my German boss please!


Yeah? German rules!! So don't use English and don't participate in English forums. Stay in Germany for the rest of your life, don't travel out. It's a high standard outside!


Exactly! I don't know why the Germans are here. Why can't the Germans leave us alone to our English-speaking forum/social life??!! That reminds me of one TTer who got pissed off that Germans were showing up at an event, speaking Denglish (and having to correct some Germans' English), when day-in, day-out at work, we have enough of listening to German-English, that German-English drawl. Now, I empathise that!

To the Germans who don't like the board (discussion), please go & look for your own German-speaking forum!! I will not go there & correct your German

Thank God I don't have money to fine-dine so I can eat like a dog. Scr*w it!

FYI, many companies now ask their potential employees to have dinner with them so they can see how their manners are. It would be good for posters here who didn't know it yet to know that this is indeed a taboo in Germany before you do not get a job because you chose to eat with the fork in your right hand.
Or when wanting to impress potential parents-in-law, would be helpful there as well, regardless of whether you dine at home or at a restaurant.

@Mariposa: Reply to your PM: Editor Bob is not my dad. Besides, haven't got the time you do to petition the Germans out as much as you have to come to a non-German forum to f*ck them with your say/want. Democracy is in but if you come to my house and tell me it's ugly, please don't come again.

As more & more German posts are added on the forum against foreigners, the more I see the connection to the history.

No, but he is the admin of this forum, if you do not want Germans to post here anymore, he would be the one to ask.

Quite impressive how you get your knickers in a twist over my post, one could think I said something a lot worse than just that Americans like to cut their food first and eat with the fork in their right hand.

But I would like to know how any of my posts ever on this forum were directed against foreigners.

Zimmer, unwad your panties. It be ze'Internet, open boundaries and all. If you read M's posts she a pretty balanced and helpful person, who happens to be German. Have not seen one rant from her.

Except for my rants about packing!!! I hate packing! But that would hardly offend anyone personally, unless you are a professional packer who loves their job (in that case would you like to come by my house and pack my bags for tomorrow?)

And the "you" is an impersonal "you", not addressing anyone specific.

P.S. Godwin's Law, hello.

There, German Taboo.

Not really. I did not even know about Godwin's Law until someone on TT mentioned it in another topic. It is also not something that was made up by a German.

Though your comparing my posts to Nazi ideology shows your total ignorance of history and is an insult to every survivor of the Holocaust. If every Nazi had thought like I do there would not even have been a Holocaust.

About Godwin's Law (from Wiki).

On the thread about making dumb generalisations based from your cultural perspective Mariposa gets taken to task for making a dumb generalisation based from her cultural perspective.

Regards of the fact it is most likely not true that 300 million people (descendents from Europe, Asia, Africa, Mexico) all have same table manners but hey on the lines of the topic THE germans this and that - it fits in...

Make me feel like I am sitting down at the pub and listening to the dumb conversation at nearby table...

Sorry get back on topic... the germans this...

Actually isn't this topic about what is a taboo here? And what I talked about is a taboo here, though not in the US from what I gathered.

Mariposa,

Regardless, the phrase that is the way the Americans eat - sounded condescending when in my humble opinion and experience it is more the way kids eat (no disrespect to kids!)... So the fact some fire came your way is not 100% surprising but the fact that you couldn´t see that and then backed it up with my "American" ex use to eat like that didn`t help that much.

You are an intelligent and well travelled individual - I am sure you will realise table manners and how people eat tends to be as much a class issue as it is a cultural. But also as I always like to say, when people talk about the USA, it is a big place rather a continent than a country.

But again it is on a generalisation thread - so I would not take it too much to heart...

Back on Topic the Germans that...

Stanford trying to imagine all those effected NY Bankers and Washington Politicians cutting up their meat and eating just with their forks...

The funny thing is I meant no judgment in saying that's how they eat, heck I did not even say that is how all Americans eat. If I say they eat with their hands in India it means no judgment either. But what I meant to say is that while it may be acceptable there, here it isn't, i.e. a taboo.
The condescending tone is something you read into it, not something I implied.

My ex' table manners were bad in other ways, like he'd suck in spaghetti and stuff like that.

Maybe Mariposa,

It was clumsily put "Americans". It is not the same as "Some Americans" nor "Not ALL". But as I said clumsily put on a thread that is designed to bring out generalisaton with "The Germans" this and that...so do not take it to heart in fact laugh at the irony but I just wanted to explain why I can see where some of the flack came from.

PS. as a vote of confidence Mariposa...you are still many people´s favourite German on the thread...mine included...

I must dash as it is Gym time and my pop belly is crying out to be trained.

Mariposa,

Maybe your ex was Chinese or Japanese American and sucking spaghetti is perfectly okay...!!! Just a thought...!

I actually didn't say Americans, I did say "the American way" which was probably still a bit clumsily put, oh well.

No he was of European descent. Nice try though!

But wait, he was from Kentucky, maybe that's why!

(Hope there are no people from KY here, who will feel insulted by this, in that case, I am joking of course, if that is not obvious.)

By the way, when I say people in India eat using their hands of course I am not saying every single person in India uses their hands, just to clarify.

Funny thing, roughly the same statement; however, depending on the person making it, it is either perfectly ok or condemned as American-bashing in worst nazi tradition.

Sucking spaghetti is great fun when there is a person at each end

I always hold my fork permanently in my right hand - knife in the left - regardless. Despite this I have excellent table manners, even though my parents tried long and hard to train me to do it "proper". Still get the odd look from the table next door when it's noticed.

And I know quite a few others who eat this way.

that would be "properly"

Returned from training my pop belly and would like to add:

I have observed the same phenomenon - positive stereotypes are allowed if not encourage but negative ones tend to get jumped on... Interesting part of human nature that seems to treat one as being okay (a compliment) and the other as been non-scientific, dumb generalisation, and showing the ignorance of the generaliser (nice word!)...

Back to watching six feet under...

Is there going to be any discussion of taboos here , like flagellation , necrophilia or bestiality or is that flogging a dead horse...? ( groans at tired old joke ...)

Thanks rosenh...

One German taboo which find find very impressive is its not the done thing to talk about house prices or salaries , whichseem often to be THE converstaions in th UK .

rosenheim, I always thought that between friends it is a perfectly acceptable topic but whenever I talked to Americans they seemed to find it awkward (also friends). Mind you, not saying all Americans yadda yadda, just my experience yadda yadda.

I've never seen someone (American or not) cut their meat completely before eating it. Well unless for a child. I'll be sure to lookout for that when I go home. I only know 2 people that I can actually say they eat with the fork in the right hand and do the switcheroo thing. I was told as a child to keep fork in left hand and knife in right. Hmm..learn something every day. Ha. By the way, can't we all just get along.

The birthday thing gets on my nerves, if you say Happy Birthday the day before or even before midnight at their party they freak and act like you wished death on them. Took some getting used to. I mean why can't you just say Happy Birthday especially if its someone that you don't see often or that you can't make it to their party.

This one is new, no baby gifts before the baby comes, why the hell not, i thought that was a right of passage for any mom to be to have a shower before the baby comes, defeats the purpose if you wait till after the baby is born right. I have a friend who bought a special outfit for the baby to be brought home from the hospital in. Weird, but will definately keep that in mind.

Not to drag up old stuff but I would like to state that NOT ALL Americans eat crap food i.e McDonalds, Burger King etc. There are some of us (myself included) who prefer heathly food over junk. So there.