British fantasy football league

Rumours going around Fleet Street are that they were going to give it to Micah Richards, but then heard there was this big geezer crowing for all his worth over in Southern Germany, so they gave it to Dunne instead.

Predictions for Week 2:

1 Blue Moon FC 82
2 Crawlies Creepers 78
3 Gallus FC 72
3 Ihsan's Shade 72
5 Sin City FC 69
6 Wee Mun Wanderers 65
7 Expat XI 61
8 FC Hazza Bollah 59
9 Komland 57
10 Super Brits 56
11 You Essexy Thing 53
12 The Solettes 51
13 The Puddings 48
14 Windy City Waterboys 47
15 Five Man Back Four 46
15 Devils FC 46
17 Augustiner United 41
18 The Dog's Tackle 40
19 Solent Gale 39
20 UnitedWeRise 38
21 Spunkalot Rapalots 33

City? No chance whatsoever!

I reckon it will come down to a scrap between the top 3 of The Arse, Chelski and Stretford Redsox for the title with Liverpool taking their usual 4th place and then any 2 of about 6 teams for the remaining 2 EUFA places.

The cups however, i think will be a lot more open and i expect to see teams outside the top 4 vying for these.

I'm doing the sheet now, so expect to see the file this side of noon.

Here is the updated table for week 2.

I'm feeling a touch of deja vu here, i hit the top early last season and then faded away as the season went on.

interesting. 78% of your points come from 4 players

Sometimes having players, such as defenders, who don't play is a better option than defenders who do play

What, is that what City did last year as well?

Brilliant start to T Hibbert of Everton...

And nobody picked him either!! tsk, tsk!

I'll fix that tomorrow. I'd have spotted it sooner or later.

...and van Persie misses a penalty.

Fuckin twat he is. My bad start to the season continues.

You and 37.2% of all managers in the official Telegraph FFL mate.

Here's something interesting. There are hundreds of thousands of managers in the official Telegraph FFL. Here are the most picked players they are using:

J Reina 21.02%
P Cech 19.71%
E van der Sar 19.02%
D James 13.86%
P Robinson 4.83%
T Howard 4.79%
B Friedel 3.92%
J Lehmann 2.45%
M Hahnemann 1.66%
S Given 1.30%

None of us have Hahnemann or Given.

P Evra 31.44%
D Agger 29.69%
M Richards 18.39%
J Lescott 17.93%
N Vidic 17.54%
E Eboue 14.77%
R Carvalho 13.13%
S Campbell 12.77%
J Carragher 12.59%
JA Riise 12.27%

Nobody here has Vidic or Eboue.

C Ronaldo 44.17%
S Gerrard 38.58%
F Lampard 29.87%
C Fabregas 23.00%
M Arteta 19.90%
F Malouda 17.65%
M Pedersen 14.79%
P Scholes 7.96%
R Giggs 7.66%
F Ljungberg 6.79%

Nobody chose Scholes.

R van Persie 37.20%
D Drogba 27.55%
D Berbatov 19.13%
C Tevez 16.79%
F Torres 15.49%
W Rooney 13.69%
D Bent 7.55%
O Martins 6.80%
A Johnson 6.10%
G Agbonlahor 5.84%

And none of us went for Torres.

Shit weekend for me

It ain't over yet.

It is for most of my players.

Oh! I've still got three left to play.

You've been top of the league bluedave and I know you enjoyed it, but that was it mate. Ciao.

I am dissapointed with the team and will make major changes next week, including the system.

As we speak, top of the league and with three players yet to play today. You're not Portuguese are you sharpe?

Wait a minute. Berbatov is fit? I thought he was supposed to be on the shelf for a few weeks. WTF??
Damn good thing Fabregas scored yesterday or I'd be even more pissed about putting in an early set of transfers.

Don't worry JJ, Berbatov didn't score any points today anyway (he got booked).

The good news is that until the MoTMs tomorrow, TTFFL has a new leader.

Weekends Motms:

Patrice Evra (Man Utd)
Frank Lampard (Chelsea)
Andriy Voronin (Liverpool)
Julio Arca (Middlesbrough)
Kasper Schmeichel (Man City)
El Hadji Diouf (Bolton )
Cameron Jerome (Birmingham)
Ashley Young (Villa)
Mario Melchiot (Wigan)
Christopher Samba (Blackburn)

Evra? Are you fucking joking? Not a single United player deserved MotM with the possibe exception of Hargreaves. Despite being on the losing side Berbatov was the best player on the park by a country mile.

Have to agree Jimbo. Telegraph doesn't seem to give MOMs to anyone on a losing side. Don't understand that. Berbatov was all over United. Evra made a couple of decent runs down the wing.

They have these weird stats as no. of passes completed, tackles made etc etc and apparently Evra completed 90% of passes and stuff.
You are right though, United were not at their best yesterday. More than Berbatov, I was impressed with Bale. He was absolutely outstanding. I dunno why United didnt persue hime enough.

Yep, Bale was very good. I went down The Arc and watched the game and thought Evra was the best player on the pitch. Scholes and Carrick were pants. It didn't seem like Tevez knew his team mates at all... or they him. What drugs is Ferdinand on now? Why does he keep nodding off?

Anyway, I've got a prediction for this week, which if true will see one's own self legging it with the Manager of The Month cache:

1 Sin City FC 119
2 Blue Moon FC 116
3 Ihsan's Shade 110
4 Crawlies Creepers 101
4 Gallus FC 101
6 Super Brits 97
7 Komland 89
8 Devils FC 86
9 Wee Mun Wanderers 83
10 FC Hazza Bollah 78
11 Windy City Waterboys 77
12 Augustiner United 72
13 You Essexy Thing 70
14 Expat XI 68
15 The Puddings 67
16 UnitedWeRise 66
17 Solent Gale 62
17 The Solettes 62
19 Five Man Back Four 60
20 The Dog's Tackle 50
21 Spunkalot Rapalots 46

Ya bandit ! Stealing my thunder at the last moment.

Well... it ain't confirmed yet mate.

Must say I'm disappointed with my start. Ronaldo is back next game and I'm sure my Owen gamble will pay off. After this weekend, there is a break for the European Qualifying games, so then will be a good time for everyone to make any changes.

Also a lot of people have already done some transfers which might not be included in that table

I sent Sin the file with all the transfers in it, so he's taken them in to account, for everyones info - I had dropped Rooney* for Owen.

*Augustiner United and Wee Mun Wanderers still have Rooney in their team and need to drop him.

Spunkpot Rapalots have a few players out injured and should make some changes.

Fingers crossed I'd like to take this opportunity to go: Ner! Ner! Na-ner! Ner!

Wee Mun still has Rooney as well. kaiserf doesn't.

Don't shoot your wad all at once, Sin.

I still think he's a bandit bar steward.

Well... it ain't over til the fat lady sings. Or 3Lions in this case. It's close at the top. If I've miscalculated by 3 points then I reckon bluedave has it.

You rarely do, i just reckon you owe me a beer.

Hi Everyone, here is the table for week 3. Sin's predictions for the month are accurate, he takes MotM.

can we see somewhere the list of transfers everyone did?

Its in the Excel file I send out. Just click on the transfers sheet.

Right, sorry. Congrats Sin. I should have transferred Lampard as well

Lemme hear you say, "YEAH!"

First look after 3 weeks away.. I see im in 6th... that aint bad since 2 players havent started a match and ive had 2 red cards!! Yes theres only been 3 red cards and Ive had 2 of em!! Still 6th aint bad! Just off to make some crucial transfers and mind boggle myself for an hour or two!

Sneaky bugger. You still transferred Ronaldo out and got Fat Frank in.

Oh! Did I?

What a day !!!

Brilliant so far.

Matthew Etherington popped up with 2 for me.

Saved the day for you did he.