Can anyone shed any light on a issue that has lead me and my German partner of four years to split up?
My partner, his two children and I went on holiday to Italy 8 weeks ago. His daughters are 11 and nearly 13. The holiday was dreadful, with my partner either letting the girls get away with very immature behaviour or by spoiling them, providing three meals a day, watching over them whilst they ate their boiled noodles and allowing them to demand and get exactly what they wanted and all of them had no regard to my lack of German. I felt like a stranger in hell.
We all got a bit ill, minor stomach upset. My partner asked if I wanted a suppository as he had given the eldest girl (13 yrs) one as she was "seriously ill". She was eating sweets and back to herself that evening. I refused as not too keen on things up my bum.
A few days later the subject of the suppository came up and it seems that he inserted it into his daughters bottom, I was shocked and he knew this but said she asked him to do it as she could not herself?!!! He said I was damaged by my reaction and it was normal in Germany to do such things to children and no big deal. I said surely the girl should have found her own bum at that age and why was it done so secretly and not talked about (until I asked) and why had he not mentioned that this was normal practice to him and his daughters?
I also have a daughter but even at the age of 8 she would have been mortified if her father had attempted to do such a thing.
So we disagreed, he did a private survey on german people, wife, sister and whoever who said it was normal and there was no problem and what was wrong with me. We went to world war 3... he suggesting that I was damaged by my reaction and my telling him that this practice at this age was intolerable and I could not put up with it. The end result is we have not spoken and he totally withdrew the more I questioned him on this cultural difference. So, he was not willing to look at how I felt about this or to discuss if there is something askew with his 13 year old daughter who asked her father to anally insert the suppository.
I would be very interested in opinions and whether I am completely wrong and being an idiot!!!



