Madeleine McCann jokes

What I personally find funny, is all these people calling for the closure of this thread, but yet they keep posting on it, keeping it alive!

My lips are sealed.

That's rich coming from a German. Do not comment on things that you do not understand. Or as Charlotte says in Charlotte's Web "Never consult geese in matters of spelling." Apply as you find.

Madeleine McCann jokes? Madeleine McCann doesn't know any jokes, and if she makes any more noise I'm going to give her another slap.

The main issue is not the 'jokes' per sé, despite not even being funny in the slightest, it's that you are brand fucking new and therefore have no credibility at all. So you are simply an obnoxious little fuck making poor taste jokes and that's never good. Add to that the fact that your profile puts you as a 40+ year old German and walking in here with that kind of crap just makes you a pathetic little shit. Poor form, Herve64, poor form.

Well said Keydeck, my sentiments exactly!

I would say it's common decency on his part! or are you sitting there choking with mirth.

The truly most depresing part of all this, is that it was started by EB. Did you latch onto that KD? No, thought not.

And yet all somone has to do on this forum is call someone a cunt, fat, wonky tits, whatever, and they get their posting pulled.

Makes me rather ashamed to be even posting here. Double fucking standards.

Whether I am or not is completely beside the point. I'm not the authority on what is or isn't funny either.

Don't get me wrong "Eleanor" I'm no Angel, I just know I don't like this ,I have a kid of my own and every day since he was born I wonder what he's up to , if he's okay,and so on. When he was little he disappeared in Herties ,I turned my back for one minute he was gone,I have never felt so helpless as I did at that moment, I ran around that shop shouting and bawling for him , he finally decided to come out of the Wardrobe he had been hiding in ,relief is not the word, followed by a smack on his arse.I certainly would not want to be in the situation that Maddies parents are in ,whatever people are saying about them , "innocent until proved guilty"
All I'm saying is if you see something thats offensive ,or somebody beating up an old person or whatever the situation you would like to take as an example , you shouldn't sit there laughing , it makes you just as bad , common sense tells me that this drivel is not right or funny!

PS . If thats you in the profile pic? there is no reason at all for you to be lonely!

herve64 - the reason gas chambers were invented

You can always stop posting if you are so ashamed. Yes, of course I know that Ed Bob started the thread. Anyone ever told you that you're a very silly little boy for a grown man?

There is a lot of sick humour around. I don't see what is wrong with posting a sick joke on a thread designed for sick jokes. Or is there some rule that you have to be a Toytown member for several years before that is acceptable.

KD

I guess it's just me, I don't think it's anything to brag about, what the fuck is remotely funny about the thought of someones child being abducted, murdered and raped? If you were a little more mature, and a little less anonymous, you might agree. As it is, you're just a cunt.

Have you got proof that she was Abducted Raped and Murdered??

If so, you must be the Perp!

Why should this thread be deleted? It keeps Maddie in the public "wonkey" eye!

No I haven't, but the "jokes" allude to that, that was my point.

Not like that's anything new here, Steve.

And yet common sense doesn't tell you to not click on a topic that is obviously going to offend you?

How do you call a man who is not able to watch his own children? - Briton. Or should I say "island monkey"?

herve64

why are you even here?

-Murat: Child kidnappings of Portugal for make benefit glorious tabloid of United Kingdom.

it was worth trawling through to find this pearl

@ Godber: we should meet. You are RIGHT ON. SPOT ON. Tell'em some more.

@Editor Bob: Why is this thread STILL here?

Yes Editor_Bob, how dare you not censor things that offend featherlight?

Maybe the thread should come with a subtitle "Warning: May contain spoilers."

Nah. You should actually learn English first rather than use one of those online translation tools.

Put the kettle on!

I may well be immature, no objection there at all, but I sure as hell am not anonymous. Don't know what gives you that idea. You're an odd one to be sure, to be sure.

Oh and...sticks and stones...etc.

I'm sure you're a decent sort at heart.

Steve.. and what is you oppinion on Keydeck being a cunt?? Does that still stand?

No, I've changed my mind.

Would that be double-fucking standards or double fucking-standards?

eh?

Then don't come back on here posting anymore, unless you wish to make yourself look an even bigger cunt than you are.

Please stop PMing me...I don't want to fuck you again, you're shit in bed.

Yes, double standards indeed. Now be a good twat and don't bother loggin onto this site again.

Whilst all this calling each other a cunt stuff is going on, can I just chip in and mention Alex Ferguson? Now THERE is a cunt. Bitter celt bastard. Uri Geller too. He's a cunt. He was once on This Morning, in the halycon days of Richard and Judy of course, none of this Fern "chubby MILF" Britton and bloody Scofield messing up the show. Anyway, Uri is on, gabbing on about his normal crap, crystals having power, Wacko Jacko being a good mate, you know the stuff, and then starts mentioning how he can germinate seeds in the palm of his hand. IN HIS HAND. Quite a skill. So, whaddya gonna do with your telent Uri? Whaddya gonna do? Contribute to stopping the problem of starvation across the globe, by using your super mind power to germinate a corn crop in Africa? No. You conduct a fucking stupid, money-spinning phone-in on TV, where students and unemployed people, AKA the "R & J Regulars",call in and guess what contrite symbol you were thinking of, just to show off your mad psychic skillz. You're a cunt Geller, a fucking cunt. They also gave Ross, from the TV series "Friends", the same surname as you, and he was a cunt aswell. Legacy of cuntishness. That's all you have. Cunt.

It was a house wasn't it? I remember seeing that one. Should've drawn a cunt.

A detailed drawing illustrating ALL of John Prescott's eye wrinkles would take ages though. Hardly something for live TV.

I have been looking into this mental magic thing and the trick to that is merely a percentage game...the words they feed you during the trick etc etc and then what objects people can actually draw generally make then draw either a house or a flower.
I have never seen Uri Geller do anything special. I remember 20 years ago when he went up to the top of Blackpool tower and the Sun newspaper front page had only the 'eyes' of Uri printed on it...loads of people sent in the bent fucking spoons and keys to show Uri how good he was! He has made a career out of sueing people who called him a fraud and has probably made more out of this than his act has. I agree, he is a cunt.

As I just said to Don by email - I'd draw a big cock. Easy to draw, and, it has to be said, easy to visualise (especially for me arf arf etc).

STOP PRESS STOP PRESS

Uri Geller aka cunt drafted in to find Maddy.



Uri Geller pictured yesterday using a stand-n-tan.

Well, you have seen so many!

Being a member of TT that's hardly surprising.

Jimbo has never seen many cocks very well though - he's a gent, and takes his glasses off before sucking my piece, which might hinder him in an optical sense, but means I don't ever get any pubes caught in that hinge bit on the glasses where the lenses bit meets the ear resting bits. That can really bring tears to your eye I tell you. Nasty.

Talking about cocks, didn't the FBI try and get Uri Geller to prove that he could stop the heart of a pig?

I've just bought some new glasses actually. Got some sunglasses too. And let's be honest, I'm a pretty big cunt at the best of times, but roof down, suit on, shades on, cruising around London and the home counties, there are few people that look more like a cunt than me.

Anyway, I've just checked, and the hinge on these looks nasty. Though I could probably put duct tape around that bit.

Talking about Fern Britton, massive tits. Her husband is well skinny aswell, I bet each one of her boobs is the same size as the bulk of his torso. I reckon she's probably a right bit of sauce aswell. Has she ever done porn? I'm off to google, and subsequently, potentially, have a wank.

Oh lower the tone of it why don't ye. I still reckon Mr. Chips took Maddie. It's the kind of thing he'd do, being a consummate cunt. But like Hasselhoffs colon, he managed to get away with it.

On a more humanitarian note, it would be nice if this litle girl turned up alive. Unlikely, but Fern Britton did lose weight, so there's hope yet.

Lost weight cos she had a gastric band fitted. She hasn't done any porn but did present Soapstar Superstar which sucked big cocks...

Was it the same band that played on the Titanic?