Madeleine McCann jokes

Q. Why did Mr and Mrs McCann cross the road?
A. That's where they abandoned the kids.

Q. What's the difference between Pope John Paul II and Madeleine McCann?
A. The Pope died a virgin.

Q. What's the difference between Madeleine McCann and Madeleine McCann jokes?
A. Madeleine McCann jokes will get old.

Q. What's the difference between Madeleine McCann and a tan?
A. A tan doesn't dissapear until after the holiday.

Q. What's the difference between Madeleine McCann and Elvis?
A. More people believe Elvis is still alive.

Q. What's the difference between the McCanns and Gary Glitter?
A. Gary Glitter comes back from his holidays with more kids than he left with.

Q. What have the parents of Madeleine McCann and Rhys Jones got in common?
A. They both know where their dead child is buried.

Q. What's dead and not newsworthy?
A. Madeleine McCann.

Q. What's the difference between Madeleine McCann and the Jews?
A. The Jews have some chance of celebrating this Christmas.

Madeleine's holiday was a typical trip to a European resort. Ruined by a stupid Gerry.

A new car being launched in Portugal, with space in the boot for a child. It's called the Renault McCann.

"The main objective of the Madeleine fund is to leave no stone unturned in the search for Madeleine." Except the stone they buried her under, presumably.

There once was a young girl called Maddie
She had such an irresponsible daddy
Snatched from her bed
She's probably dead
Raped by a Portuguese baddy









Related topic: Disappearance of Madeleine McCann, four year old British child missing in Portugal

Wikipedia: Disappearance of Madeleine McCann

And I thought I was the Bad Boy of TT!!

It's his website, he can be as unPC as he wants, I giggled.

Holy. Shit. Midweek Madness may officially commence.

Love the limerick!

And I thought the mods went all cuddly-sensitive recently and had a policy of removing bad taste stuff and crap jokes. My faith in human moderator nature is restored.

Quality.

Sick.

Sick as in the Aussie meaning like awesome or wicked, and pronounced "sieck mate, sieck!" or do you just mean plain old missionairy sick?

Yeah, you have to write more than 'sick'. Because 'sick' is actually the point of them.
Normally we'd be waiting for the first person to:

A . Read the title and see that people have made jokes about this tragedy. (Just like people do for every other tragedy, although this will somehow escape their memory and they will be 'shocked' 'dissapointed' and so on.)

B . Click on the thread and read the jokes anyway, with slightly flared nostrils.

C . Dash out an angry post declaring the jokes offensive. (Observation powers in these types are often acute.)

and, possibly, if lucky..
D . Finish off with a mini-flounce, usually with some angry capitals, emphatic italics or to really make a point - start a thread and sell a large server very quickly.

Has EB been hacked or is he drinking?

Q: Whats the difference between Maddie and a Boomerang?
A: Boomerangs come back

Q: What have Maddie and Houdini got in common?
A: They both disappear and they're both dead

Q: What's tanned and really, really happy?
A: A Portuguese Paedophile

Q: How much does a meal at your favourite Portugese tapas restaraunt cost?
A: Your child

cut and past - I would never think such things

EB has now devolved into a human. The end of the world is near. Run for you lives!

I guess it's just a matter of taste. What has worse taste: Maddie McCann jokes or yeast extract?

M

Rebellion in mod-land. Grab your pitchforks and head for the defences...

I'm surprised it took so long for any of these to get posted.

Not as surprising as the lack of a post yesterday whining about the weather.

Picture of incredibly stupid people – check the features it can help you for future recognition of such individuals.



Anyone that disagrees with me is an idiot or on drugs or both.

Sad but had to happen I guess, 'tis the british way. Be it tsumanis, suicide bombers or anything else.
Could we make one up using the starting line

I hear Michael Jackson has bought a new holiday villa in the algarve...

?

reminds me of the joke about Beckham and how he turned downa 100million transfer to Newcastle because he heard what the toon-army did to Thailand...some dude got fired off the BBC for saying that on air!

Sometimes there are events where only b3ta will say what others only dare to fleetingly consider. This is such a time (but I still hope they find her, but I don't believe this bloody circus will help).

Sickipedia has a ton of them. My favourite, and close to my heart:
Q: What have the Portuguese Police, The English Football Championship and a cordless drill got in common?
A: No Leads

Yay for apathy.

What do you get for kidnapping a four year-old?

An erection.

What's the difference between a Portugese paedophile and a greyhound?

The greyhound waits for the hare.

Terrorist win.

To the tune of Candle in the wind...

All together now...

well I am no angel and indeed like a bad taste one myself but I dont like these jokes.

Just for you, jeremy:
Q: How do you make a Bloody Nicole?
A: Vodka, tomato juice and a stab of OJ.

It's the grammar in that poem that appalls me. Are these people not embarrassed?

I don't see what anyone gets from these jokes. It lowers my opinion of the posters tremendously. I remember classmates making jokes about similar such tragic cases when I was a kid... even then they usually got told to fuck up (and that was by other kids).

I agree these jokes are awful



“The Lord forgives you but and you must recite for the penance of your sins:

Two Billion Hail Mary’s
Three Billion Hail Father’s
One Million Act of Contritions
Two Million Act of Faiths

And I hope your are more generous with your cash offering to the collection plate when it comes around than you are with babysitters you tight Scottish bastards.�

Don't you mean "Hail Medeleines", "Hail Daughter's", "Hail Acts of Pedophilia" and "Hail Acts of Stupidity"?

I did but I didn’t want to upset will2write’s sensitivities too much.

Fuck up what? Their timing?

fucking hell this is sick.

the parents acted stupidly but we are talking about a 4yr old wee girl here.

shame on you all.

Editor Bob - I remember reading a while ago some article about this website in the news and how good it was for blah blah yawn yawn ex pats in munich and germany etc. shame the article wasnt being written just now, eh?

you might not have had such glowing praise then.

I agree, Schotte, this is insensitive and cruel. I've been ignoring this thread ever since Editor Bob started it, but I think it's time I voice my opinion. I hope EB shows some maturity on this matter and delete this thoughtless thread immediately.

I generally like sick jokes so I haven’t said anything in this thread yet. OK the Elton John pic is funny, I think because it takes the piss out of him and not the situation with the girl.

I do have to say im surprised about some of the things that have been said here, if everything is free game is it ok if I start a thread taking the piss out of Pakis or saying things such as…..

What’s the difference between a kid from Dunblane and a sieve?

A sieve has less holes in it.

Its not really funny is it?

oh, get off your high horse! You have never ever made a joke about the misfortune of another person or event?

I think it's precious to see Schotte getting all indignant like that.

Schotte - thanks for having the guts to point out the bleeding obvious.

It defies belief that the admin. of this site should start such a thread.

Sad, sick, and not even remotely funny.

Good Grief! Words almost fail me – but, only almost!
I can well imagine, that sick, paedophiles, and other scum of the earth – might just find the perverse humour of some of the things written on this thread, ---funny!
Personally, I find much of what has been written here absolutely disgusting.
A little 4 year old British girl is missing, and here, on a British site - are chatters, who obviously have nothing better do in life than content their perverse little minds, by making ( so called) fun of the situation.
And, to those who have played “ follow my leader� – I must say , you sound like a load of silly kids at a teddy bears picnic!
GROW UP!
SHAME on the lot of you!
dusie.

I have to agree. Making jokes about an innocent little girl who has most likely been raped and killed should not be a part of Toytown.

Well said. Thanks.

And I got in trouble for laughing at the poor fool that put gas into in diesel car.


Now that was funny.

i honestly think without trying to sound too melodramatic, but this website has gone some way down the toilet with keeping a thread like this.

ignore it then. go do something useful (like row a boat!)

Shame on you!!! It's a relief that someone finally introduced some sanity and principles to this thread. Why do you always try and patronise people here? Whenever anyone shows some sensitivity or writes in a touching/humane way, you instantly come crashing in and patronise them. People like you make others afraid to write with integrity and express themselves, as you and your like are always ready to cheaply demean it. Anyone can see how easy it is for you to do that on a written discussion forum. Please, I beg you for the sake of this site - let people get upset. Let them show principles and passion. This site would be all the more interesting if people could show that without your embittered comments instantly appearing afterwards.

komland- you joined at 11pm tonight, and seem to have some opinions of people already, so who are you really?

These is nothing new about these jokes, there is a long and distinguished history of Black Comedy, Gallows Humour, or just generally off colour jokes going back centuries.

It's even more ironic that you comment about this being a "British" website and "British" couple, as Britain has been one of the more notorious sources of this form of humour over the course of history (even shakespeare had a go at it)...

Well I might suggest that EB has made somewhat of a prat of himself here and might own up to such. Might earn a lot of people's respect.