Belgian senate candidate offers 40,000 blowjobs

Tania Derveaux, an NEE party senate candidate is offering 40,000 blowjobs to anyone who requests one!

She claims this all came (excuse the pun!) about due to the other parties unrealistic job opportunity promises! She responded to these promises with a parody campaign posing naked and promising 400,000 jobs. This campaign resulted in international media attention and a lot of emails looking for 400,000 blowjobs. So now she is now promising 40,000 blowjobs to garner even more media attention!

Wonder if she'll be true to her word!

another reason to love the Belgians!
The parliament is a lot more laid back than other governements i've seen/visited (as in go on a tour of the building and do a Q&A session with members).

Signed up for mine

jester can i have her number?

this reminds me of the high school girl/cheerleader who goes down on the entire football/basketball team.

Now signed up 17 times.

Excuse me, I'm gonna be a bit busy this afternoon.

Ok, I am set for the rest of my life.

183 times

Fuck! I'm gettin' RSI.

that's nuthin compared to what Tania's gonna get!

I didn't know you had a purple sin, big scouse bird

She reckons its going to take her 500 days. Thats 80 blow jobs a day. Lets say each blow job takes 5 minutes. Thats 400 minutes a day of sucking cock. The average penis length (as measured by staff) is around 13 cm. She does 50 head bobs a minute which go the entire shaft as she's a deep throating slag, which means she will do 250 head bobs for each guy. That's a total of 3,250cm of cock per person. That's about 650 cmpm (centimeters of cock per minute). In the 500 days she will have sucked a total of 1,300 Km of cock.

how many politicians does it take to blow a job...eh ok, ok, sorry for the bad gag, it was just a reflex. ba da bum. thanks folks, i'll be here all week.

ps: maths and dirty talk, i love IW.

@ IW that's assuming that she's only giving them to dudes.

@ Sin rumbled!

Sorry Sin.

@IW, are you an official adjudicator?

@eurovol, currently I have 452 new names.

@IW,
So you only measure it going in one direction and not the return stroke?
Going in...13cm and going out ...13cm.
26cm covered in total

wow! you sure do know your calculations... you have a new fan!

As eurovol rightly quote:


That probably crushes a lot of your dreams...however, the following rules pretty much rule the lot of you out anyway!!!


In other words, no youngsters with unwashed genetalia and not packing a johnny will be allowed to attempt to choke Tania. Can't say this guy ain't got morals!!!

Wha???

Where's the sport in that?

'kin slapper. Didn't want a BJ from her anyway. If she calls I shall tell her to bugger off.

I was presuming that while she's on either the exit or entry stroke taking a breath and not actually "sucking cock". Sorry I should have stated this in my original comments. Although, perhaps she is a bit of a Rolf Harris type and can breath through her nose and do the didgeridoo thing. The advert doesnt mention that.

Perhaps I should make adjustments that maybe 1 in 3 strokes she actually needs to take a breath.

And here she is... - and her website

The website link was in the original post...

Just had a look at this, a live map of people signing up (allegedly)

Well done DK. You must be one of them there internet experts. Thanks.

No, the internet expert is the spammer who set up this site in order to gather valid emails for targeted Viagra / penis enlargement spams...

Sorry.. But this thread needed a pic.
Maybe a MOD can move it to the first page/post...

No one complained about the pic, it was the crazy attempt to pretend you post was for anything other than the pic we complained about...

I think you have a fundamental flaw in your calculation.
And that is your assumption that a blow job will take 5 min.
I take it, you base that assumption on the time it will take the guy reach climax.
But I haven't seen anywhere in the rules, that this is a requirement.
So technically, just a bit more then a kiss on the "Johnson" can count as a blow job.
And if you don't think she will use that reasoning (if at all it will ahem, come, to this), what can I say...

They have restored my faith in politics!

I wonder whose grasp of the way politics work is more likely to be true...

WTF is navelstaren?

This all reminds me of a rugby tour many years ago to a little town in The Netherlands you may have heard of called Amsterdam. Myself and some of the chaps were having a little wander around the museums and hazarded across a street filled with some ladies of an easy nature. Well...one was a rather fine specimen, dressed as I remember in the manner of an american highschool cheerleader. We stopped for a little look and rather surprisingly she seemed quite friendly and was beckoning us in to her modest home for afternoon tea and scones. Well, the lads and I had a bit of a chat, and we came to the rather distressing conclusion that in fact this was an attempt to garner financial reward for favours - me and the boys are rather worldy and knowledgeable in such matters. We had a quick whip round and a volunteer (not regretfully my goodself) was duly selected to partake of tiffin. Now...the odd thing was that after about 3-4 minutes there was a lot of shouting and abuse from behind the door, and my chum was forcibly ejected, pushed down the stairs, spat on and she continued abusing him - throwing his jacket after him. Why you ask? Well...ooops that is the phone...be back later to finish the tale.

@Eleanor Rigby

Contemplating your navel.

Pish and poppycock, JE

Ah yes, getting a blowjob is much more productive than comtemplating your navel.

It was indeed one of my assumptions... In fact you've got me thinking.

Presuming that she does bring everyone of those 40,000 people to climax and that the average male ejaculation is going to be around 3 millileters of semen she is going to have to deal with a total of ~120 litres of semen or about half a pint a day. Now the question is does she spit or does she swallow?!?!

If she were to swallow it, then I think she is easily over the daily recommended dosage of Vitamin C.

I think you meant to put "ejaculated" ?

@IW, It said that each person must provide condoms, so I reckon she isn't going to be swallowing anything.

*blech*

Nah, he was spot on.

From the Terms of Service:
"We adhere to high standards of service but due to time limitations each performance can last no longer than 5 minutes, no exceptions will be made under any circumstance."

Hope they have a fluffer on hand for those with a little less lead in the pencil, then.

Well, that's my maths flushed down the toilet then.

Anyway back again. So after much hassle and cajoling, and after about 2-3 days he finally admitted the issue. Frankly we could not figure out what strange act you could perform to make a Dutch hooker go bonkers. It turns out the lady was indeed a professional. Within 10 seconds of him stepping through the door she had his cash, and his old man performing to the music. About another 30 seconds later the whole performance had reached it's crescendo and natural conclusion. This had a sobering effect on my good friend who suddenly realised he had a problem. Firstly that having shot his bolt so fast he might get some ribbing from his mates outside in the street, and secondly that he had not had a chance to see or play with the rather amazing breasts that had attracted us all in the first place. But by now of course it was all too late. Both sides of the contract had been completed and she was certainly not getting her kit off for him. So the last three minutes before he was chucked out the door was my mate trying to argue her into getting the puppies out, and also as a stalling tactic to avoid being seen as a premature ejaculator.

You should read between the words.
No longer then 5 minutes, says nothing about how quick it can be.
But if she really enjoys it, and the guy can hold more then 5 min. well, tough for her, they will break it up after 5 min. no matter if she likes it or not!
A deal is a deal!
I mean, imagine she does longer... - the the guy can sue!
(or the guys standing inline after him)

Anyone get selected for a blowjob??

Have to say it sucked!

http://www.movielol.org/performance.php?name=????

Another blowjob type scam?