German men and their cars

For me cars are simply a mode of transport, an often (in)convenient way of getting reasonably quickly from A to B. No more, no less. Living here in Germany, I have often wondered why typical German males appear to be so dependent on their Autos. Surely one can easily survive without them considering the ruthless efficiency of the German public transport system? But men (and women) the world over are interested in cars, I hear you cry. Yes, interested possibly, but not this overbearing obsession, which afflicts the German male - far worse in my opinion than the affliction endured by their fellow Europeans. ...



This is not a sudden development in my eyes. It is an observation formed since the early nineties. Male readers of this site: ask yourself why are you in Germany/Munich? Is it because of a woman/women? You may also have cultivated the German male's attitude towards cars. Many have suggested he treats his car better than his woman. Is it too extreme to suggest the average German male would rather service his vehicle than her indoors? Does it come down to obedience and submission? Obviously a car is far less likely to disobey their commands than some stupid woman!

Don't get me wrong; the German male is perfectly capable of major amounts of TLC - but generally only towards their beloved autos. Clean this, hoover and polish that. It is their pride and joy, their baby. It often acts as a penis extension as he speeds off, burning rubber at the lights - leaving the car beside him in his wake showing the poor loser who's the daddy of the traffic lights.



A recent observation - a few weeks ago I was returning from the airport on the S-Bahn. I found myself sitting within ear/eye shot of two particularly gorgeous German ladies. This pleasure was soon short-lived as their male chaperones (lucky b@stards) soon struck up an increasingly heated conversation about car engine sizes, various car makes, pros/cons of said vehicles etc. You get the drift. The accompanying fit females nodded in tired agreement in a vain attempt to appease the increasingly irritated Herren. I did feel their collective pain for having to slum it on the S-Bahn but still this conversation was particularly ball-numbing stuff - rabbitting on about PS this and PS that. "Can't they get worked up or emotional about anything other than the size of their engine?" I thought.

This eavesdropped conversation is, I find, sadly very typical. The average German male's basic range of conversation is often limited to the merits or drawbacks of the current Beamer or Merc. He becomes very animated when discussing inflated petrol/diesel prices. He is more than happy to spend half his natural life stuck in unending traffic jams not just during rush hour but even in their spare time. If its not cars or mechanical appliances, conversation is then often limited to their job (if they have one) or football (but only if Bayern Munich are doing well).





While their cars are generally immaculate inside and out, would someone care to explain a popular German look of moustache and mullet? That takes some topping surely.

The Germans modern day role model and favourite sportsman is undoubtedly Michael Schumacher. Occupation - champion Formula 1 racing driver. This is no coincidence.

Article written by: flogger

Absolutely right. It seems to be a male obsession in most countries ... but particularly here. Good job we have Sundays to give the car wash a rest.

Bunch o' filtered-perception crap.

Bollocks!!

So, the gist is: German men are boorish, sexist, car-obsessed apes overcompensating for small penises who couldn't be arsed to pleasure a woman properly and I am an elightened renaissance man who's just too cool and post-generation-x-jaded to care about such things.

Mist. The car obsession here is not significantly greater than anywhere. Most men of all nationalities are boorish, sexist, car-obsessed apes overcompensating for small penises who couldn't be arsed to pleasure a woman properly.

This is just another ididotic caricature of Germans. I hope you were not paid to write this claptrap. It would be better to replace the main page with advertising than posting more of this dreck.

a clean car: sign of a sick mind

This piece does not go deep enough. Surely it could be more provocational. The author has let the Jerries off too lightly in my eyes.

Fascinating to witness 'unsatisfied reader' falling hook, line and sinker for this one by taking it completely at face value rather than seeing it for what it obviously is: a piece of amusing provocation.

'a piece of amusing provocation'

which thus fails quite miserably

i find this a very, very accurate appraisal.
not much left to talk about after cars, cars and cars for them is it?
the writer has hit the nail on the head in terms of the vacuous teutonic entities he has so wonderfully described .

Not a full time Munich resident, just here 1 week a month for about 6 months. As an American, I suppose I should fall into the "car crazed" catagory. Yet my first impression when I came over in September was how cool to be in a city where I did not need a car. I get around via S Bahn/ U Bahn and would not dream of a rental.

thanks for feedback, my next topic under consideration is the acceptability of monkey noises at sporting events

Well Flogger, it was a bit aggressive, but in essence not far from the mark..
In the states, my circle of male friends consisted of perhaps 50% who regularly did their own car repairs, a few of whom did that for a living.. I never recalled any mention, never mind discussion, over horsepower or the merits of turbo.. And I don't recall those topics were really very interesting for many over 17 years old. So, I too have often been witness to the passionate conversations one hears all to often regarding cars in this Autokultur.
At any rate, none of this German male obsession could come as any surprise. Were we really not aware before arriving here that this is the city of BMW, the land of supercharged freeways, and a Volk whose national hero is a formula 1 "sportsman"?
( I wonder if those athletes require special diets?)
Fahrvergnügen!

I've lived here for 12 years and never seen any sign of the car-crazed german males that you're referring to. On the contrary when my english/irish/whatever friends come over to visit the first thing most of them men do is exclaim about how many fab cars there are here, the joys of being able to boot down the autobahn without speed restrictions, etc.

I find comments like "The average German male's basic range of conversation is often limited to the merits or drawbacks of the current Beamer or Merc." to be utter tosh. A lot of my german male friends here don't even own a car (you don't really need one if you live in the centre) and the ones that do brag on about their cars no more or no less than anyone else.

Maybe there are troups of german men who go about doing nothing more than discussing cars, or failing that "If its not cars or mechanical appliances, conversation is then often limited to their job (if they have one) or football (but only if Bayern Munich are doing well).", I just haven't met them. And in fairness to the schumacher-worship, if any of our countries produced someone who'd had the sucess at formula 1 we'd be doing exactly the same thing, (I mean look at Beckham, lordy most of us still know who Barry Sheen is...)

What David Beckham is a success at Formula 1?

strange argument there...