Why are you unhappy today?

Because I just got freaked out by a weirdo on the way home. Never felt that unsafe in Munich before. And then called someone to make me feel better and found out something I was kind of counting on is not going to happen and now I'm all shaken up and it's just a really shit end to the evening.

I cant get no sleep!

Prepare yeselves for a real rant:

I am extremely unhappy today because yesterday my neighbor and good friend of 13+ years had surgery after being diagnosed with Stage 3C ovarian cancer very recently. Fact: She is the same age as I am and she has 3 children very similar in age to my 3 children and lives generally a healthier lifestyle than I do, i.e. no cigs ever!

I feel horrible for her; will help her as much as she will let me. She is like me, when in trouble, refuses help and tries to be completely *strong* all the way through. But I do know her and her family's life is changed forever. <25% of the women with her diagnosis have a survival rate of more than 5 years.

Every one of my 4 aunts and my mother and my grandmother have breast or ovarian cancer and it's just horrible to watch relatives/people grow old fighting cancer to the point where all is so hopeless and lost that the person with cancer is just a burden on everyone and not really like themselves anymore. My mother is now similar to an Alzhiemer's because she has a rare brain cancer. It is now not clear whether it is the brain cancer or the necrosis from the whole brain irradiation which has rendered her senile. Yet it is certainly a fact that at this point her treatments have not improved her quality of living even though they have kept her alive. Quality of life:--> for my mother(oblivious) for my father, for me (ugh).

YES, I have had the BRCA1 and 2 genetic test and have not tested positive.

But the bottom line is, I try to remain upbeat for the sprogs and and myself. However at times like this, I go through a period of reflection that is harsh. I am tired of the chirade that Amis put up for their kids. I think many Americans have forgotten that one way to raise kids is through example adults, as opposed to bending over backwards to the point where one doesn't act as an adult, but a servant to the kids.

** where is the discussion about the husband ** not ready to do it on this rant.

Oh yeah, and did I say the bottom line is that I can't stand getting older when I am this old?!

Ah well, that felt good. Life is not perfect. I'll be better tomorrow.

Forgot to make the most important point in my previous post, sometimes would like to punt on every responsibility and enjoy the end of life before I become comatose.

That's all folks.

i can't decide what to do about a dog. a dog needs to be rehomed and i wan tot take it or help it but i'm not sure. i met it today and it's sweet, but will be a lot of work. i'm just afraid she'll end up dead or something if i don't take her (she'll probably be taken to a shelter that is overcrowded and doesn't have a no-kill policy)
so i don't know what to do

@jellybean, sorry you're having such a hard time.

I am unhappy because the closest I will get to having sex for two weeks was the dog that stuck his head under my skirt yesterday.

be glad it's only 2 weeks. some others have to suffer longer.

I can't get the damn eclipse plugin working. Aghhhh.

just found out a really really sweet old man (a patient of mine) never recovered from his heart surgery last week, and died. I see his whole family, and they are a really nice family.

What was this I read somewhere about you acquiring a dog?
@ Carm - What a bummer! Sorry for your and their loss.

I feel your pain although I'm probably more excited about the cat than the boyfriend. They both come home on the same day, we'll have to see which one gets more attention.

yeah and when i get home we can also see which pussy gets the most attention.

Now I am unhappy because I have spent about three hours - altogether - on the phone to United and my earrings have been boring into my skull because I was typing e-mails while negotiating the flights and had the receiver clamped between my ear and my shoulder. And I have to call these bozos tomorrow (holiday, remember?) for the final price of the flights.

ER and OG you two are hilarious! I think Willie will be excited to see you too!
The pussie always deserves attention.

Sarabyrd- I'm not sure what to do about the dog. Brennan is still around of coursel Long story short one of my exboyfriend's nieces had this dog now is getting rid of it and his dad has it and basicallyt he dog has no home and is going to be sent to an overcrowded shelter (thus probably being killed). I'm trying to figure out a way to help it. I would love to take her (I met her yesterday), but some people are fine with Bren, but don't think multiple dogs are a good idea (of course i'm completely opposite). now i'm trying to convince my dad to take her. No matter what i feel horrible for her due to no fault of her own she has a crap life and might die.

When I'd have to book Brennan on flights back and forth from Germany to the US I used to call United in the US because i found them to be more helpful.

If I start on about the agent I spoke to I will have to move to The Vent

cuz its been another lonely holiday

cos I'm simply unhappy with everything at the moment. A phase that will pass quickly, I hope.

Some %$?*&! is bloody drilling in my building on my day off.

Thats probably because its "sombody's" day off also & his wife is saying "now get this done instead of sitting around..."

Probably true HEM, hadn't thought about that

Hahahahahahahahaha!!! This complaint coming from someone who drilled after 6pm on a Friday really made my day. Did you stick a copy of the Hausordnung on his door yet? Ask next door if they have a spare.
(Hahahahaha again)

No no no no no no...
I seem to recall Dave wouldnt know whick end of a drill to pick up... the same for a Kettle and a screwdriver!!!

Kettle? I don't even own one i think?

...because despite having asked 2-3 weeks ago for the presentation slides I'm meant to be giving in German on Tuesday, I still haven't received it and apparently won't be getting it till Monday, the day I fly. Oh joy, don't you love presenting new products you don't know in another language without having had enough time to prepare.

I think I lost someone that was very special to me.

*hugs* Hope you can work things out.

what started in a good night ended up quite awkward and a friend leaving annoyed with me because i commented if he wanted to get drunk and stay here he could sleep with my roommate (as in not with me) (i was joking about the with my roommate part, but not the overall message).

I am unhappy because my 18-yr-old cat just had a fit and fell over. The scared, dazed look in her eyes wrung my heart.
EDIT: Due to kidney insufficiency she is burning her body-own protein leading to muscle spasms and weakness. The doc has given her some medicine to enhance her passing waste and would not commit himself to her life expectancy. He says when she has 3 fits per week or her hind parts wiggle back and forth like a slalom skier it's time. His imitation of a slalom skiing cat made me feel better already.

because I just really need a hug right now...

Here's a big HUG from me... I am good at hugs!

_{Shit at life though}

oh stop it Grinner. Get rid of your self-defeating attitude!

anyway, work is boring, as usual. my roomie got a raise and i realized i probably won't last here long enough to get one.

Today I lost the man that has meant more to me than any other. It doesn't matter as to the time we live in, ultimately duty and honour will come to call. It is the human condition to lose those we love and to be helpless in the face of that loss - no matter how hard we try to keep fate and destiny within our own hands. Do I regret this love, never. He shall always be within me and a part that I keep sacred.

Strong, brave words. I hope you will be happy again someday.

I had some long-overdue dental work done today and the anaesthetic is just wearing off so instead of having half a frozen face (the right half of my face is now 3 hours younger than the left) I have throbbing volcanoes of pain erupting everywhere. Awoooooooooo.

This is doing my head in!!! DAMN IT!!!

That is what usually makes me wonder whether the anesthetic is really worth it, as it just delays the pain. Though last time, I did not have any pain at all after it wore off. Hope you feel better tomorrow.

Dear allergies,
You suck. I hate you, leave me alone.
No love,
Mariposa

Because I cant sleep...

My head is all mashed up!!!

Thanks Mariposa, all better today (suppose this should be in the Happy thread then). I'm a real coward about pain, particularly dental pain, and if I didn't have injections so that I didn't feel anything at the time, I wouldn't even go. So all my teeth would rot, and they'd hurt. So there's pain involved at every stage. WTF, how about that for a piece of crappy biological design, eh. Couldn't the Supreme Designer find some other way of telling us not to eat so many sweeties? (OK, this should be on the Vent thread.)
Hope your allergies ease off.

Because my mum would be really upset if I blew my head off with a rifle*, yet it seems an increasingly attractive way to end this fuck boring existence that we all trudge through, knowing full well that its a waste of fucking time and effort. Fuck it.

*after taking out as many bystanders as possible of course. Fuck you Germany you scum.

I just need to whine a bit.

I'm unhappy because my mom died last week and I MISS her. All I really want to do right now is to have some time to mourn and to try to grasp the idea that she's gone. But right now, I'm knee-deep in all the red tape that needs to be done (burial, insurance, etc.). And then there's the ongoing family squabble of who gets what, it's not fun umpiring that. And I'm worried about my father, suddenly he looks much older and sickly now that he's alone in the house. And it sucks that I can't afford to take time-off from work as I need the money and I'm a freelancer.

...bout of self-pity now over, will stop whining now.

At least...

...I have a job with a great company...As a freelancer, I can stay with father to make sure that he's ok and not lose my job... This red tape won't take forever and then I can mourn on my own time.

Feels nice to have said it out loud.

That's what this thread is for, honey. I have heard that keeping busy right after the funeral distracts you from the loss and helps you get accustomed the fact that your loved one is gone. All the best to you, be strong.

Things better now, Don?
Hope they are!
I'm glad that my 2 dogs just finished dinner without fighting.

Cos what i'd been told countless times turns out to be true

Just noticed that my last sentence in this thread yesterday should have been in another thread.
Anyway...

Excessive drinking causes hangovers?

(Disclaimer: I know it´s normal puppy behavior, I just need to let out my frustration)

...because my dog is wired wrong. He seems to think he should only go to the bathroom indoors. I have just spent about half an hour with my dog outside from 2:30-3:00! He was sleeping in his little tent peacefully, had already gotten up with me once to pee in the kitchen (I wasn´t fast enough to catch him), and then started barking. So I waited until he was quiet, like they tell you to, and opened the zipper on his tent and let him out. In the kitchen he did the walking-in-circles-and-squatting thing, so I grabbed him and plonked him on the newspapers I had spread out just outside my apartment door on top of plastic (someone suggested this to me yesterday since I can´t get him outside super-quickly). He looked at me, walked off the plastic and squatted about a meter away in the landing. I put him back on the newspaper. He walked into the apartment about a meter and squatted, back and forth about five times. So then I realized that it wasn´t going to happen immediately, so I took him downstairs into the courtyard. He just started walking around sniffing plants as if he´d never needed to poop in the first place. He came and looked all cute, bit my ankles, lay down near me, went right over to the window-well he fell down yesterday...and looked whinily at me wondering why we had to stay outside. So I thought, right, he knows he shouldn´t go in the courtyard, so we went out to the sidewalk (me in my thermal shirt and hotpants underwear) and he was the best dog ever, sticking to my side when I walked. Just sometimes he would walk in front of me to block me, sit down and look at me with his best "cute me" face asking to be picked up and taken back upstairs. I must admit, I was having fantasies about picking him up and squeezing him out like a fat fuzzy tube of toothpaste. I actually tried to walk him in a circle (he followed me around and around like a good boy) then I put him in a squat and tried to stroke his tummy, but of course he just thought I was nuts. I was on the verge of giving up. I mean, the boy is soooo smart, he´s the best dog ever. He just is confused on this point and I don´t know how to communicate with him. FINALLY, finally, he went in the middle of the bike path (as he has the four other times he´s ever done anything outside) and squatted and pooped. I was so happy and proud. Before I got a dog, I used to think watching your dog poop would be a really gross thing, but it makes me soooo happy when he does it outside! I´m like a mom who´s kid just made Eagle Scout or something.

Oh. and I feel guilty because I realized I´d been starving Tobi! The lady I got him from gave me a bag of food, with no dosing instructions. I gave him what I thought was about right and realized I was basing it on what we would feed our grown cats at home (they are about the same size) -- but when I went to get more food and checked out the amounts, I realized I had been giving him maybe at most a third of what he was supposed to get! I felt so horrible, starving my little guy. Luckily, he liked the new type of food (I couldn´t get the old kind) and ate a ton of it and also drank loads of water. After that my slim doggy was like a fuzzy ball with paws and ears -- his tummy was pretty distended. So I kind of expected tonight to be a heavy digestion night.

Oh, for a full night of sleep. And for a quiet conscience regarding my dog! I was afraid I´d do something wrong, and I starved him!

Ruthie, no need to be unhappy or you'll make us ALL unhappy.
This business with the peeing and pooing wll pass and soon you'll
have forgotten all about this post of yours.
Don't be guilty about the feeding - he's OK. Make sure he gets some
puppy supplement or buy dogfood for puppies... it has all the supplements
already in it. Have fun.

Agreed. But not too much 3 times a day should be enough at his age and at regular times determined by you not the dog, same goes for taking him out. You shouldn't need to go out at 3am. That way he'll get used to the procedure and you'll have him house trained in no time. You have to be cruel to be kind.

_{I know this shouldn't be in this thread but the dog is everywhere.}