Advice on bureaucracy for an unmarried father - Germany

So, the details:

Girlfriend get pregnant, child is born a month ago, im thrown out of the house.

Now, hopefully i can manage to reason with her without getting lawyers involved. First thing i need to do is get my name officially placed on the birth certificate(wasnt done before because i couldnt get my own birth certificate in time)...the mother is being slightly unreasonable on this issue and wont allow that until the baby turns 2.

I plan to go study in the states, so im wondering what the process is, and what my responsibilities are for being officially stated as the father. I know that they state will need my financial info(how to convert that from USA to German?), and we can pretty much assume that i cant afford to pay erziehungsgeld for the child at this moment(as i will be studying for the next years), so how does that work? Does the state pay for me, and then i pay the state back at some point? Its difficult to find info on this topic in english, but perhaps someone can suggest something in either english or german.
Also, in case a lawyer should need to be involved, who can recommend a good one in berlin?
Any info is much appreciated.

Thanks.

I'm sorry I don't have any practical advice to offer, just wanted to wish you good luck.

Same with me...

No income is no income, no matter where. You are entitled to a certain amount for your own costs of living.

You don't pay Erziehungsgeld, the Federal government does. You mean Kindesunterhalt I assume.

Yes. For years. If you are honest and keep them informed of where you are they will hound you.
Is the g/f just post partum depressive or are there more basic issues? I do hope the two of you can reach a modus vivendi.
@ Grinner: Go climb a roof.

If you are stated on the papers as biological father, you are obliged to pay Unterhalt (child support). How much depends on your income, and the age of the kid. There is a reference table called "Düsseldorfer Tabelle" . (German) But if you don't earn any money you won't have to pay.

If you don't pay support, the state will pay her some monthly support called "Unterhaltsvorschuss", 127 € for West-Germany for children under 6 (bit more for 6 -12), for a maximum of 6 years and only until the child is 12 yrs old. The state will claim this money back from you, but, if you can prove that you can't pay, you won't have to (I guess they will contact you regulary and ask about your income). No idea how this works when you live in the US, and no idea whether they still can claim it back from you later.
Anyhow, I wouldn't mess up with the authorities, as this can cause you trouble if you want to return to Germany, better cooperate with them.

In addition she will get "Kindergeld" (154 € per month), and "Erziehungsgeld", depending on how much she earns, for a maximum of 2 years and max. 300 €.

I would advise her to seek assistance from Jugendamt (as it's free) to get further information .

Concerning your rights as a father/ how to become the father on the papers I can't give you any advise!

There are several organisations helping fathers to get their rights, I googled this one for Berlin, on the website they've stated that they also can give advise in English. They can help you find a lawyer specialised on this area, if necessary, and tell you about your rights and duties.

good luck!

have a look at this thread about custodial rights and all that
and check out the "trying to save a relationship" thread posted by DeadManWalking - it's pages and pages long, but at some stage the discussion turns to fathers' legal rights... basically you don't have that many if you didn't get wed

did you get thrown out a month ago? and is she slightly less furious with you now, or is it a lost cause?

in any case, i feel for you - shit situation to be in

Shouldn't you type, Got My Girlfriend pregnant, our child was born a month ago, and because I want to go to the US and study, she asked me to leave the house.

Sorry mate, my view, You cant go and study now, go and get a job an pay for your kid. Big problem I know, but next time wear a rubber.

And I am sorry for you as well.

@TB, do you know more than us, or are you making assumptions about why he was chucked out?

Hate to tell you but if she decides not to put you on the birth certificate you're pretty much screwed. On the up side, if she doesn't want to acknowledge you as the father, you won't have to pay child support.

I assume you're American? I've been throught a lot of this personally because I'm in a really complicated situation myself. If you want to PM me we can talk about it. I don't feel like typing a book right now.

an assumption that is most probably out of place.

as an unmarried father in germany you have virtually no rights as a parent and need to jump through a dozen bureaucratic hoops to be recognised as such (friends had their first child before marrying and said it was a nightmare - he's english and she's german).

just imo but if you want the right to be a father, then you need to go and get a job and support your child, not think about disappearing to america to study. i'm with troyboy there.

Many questions here. Why did you get thrown out? Were you planning on going to the US alone or with your girlfriend? Why do you want your name on the birth certificate when you clearly want nothing to do with your child for the next few years or are you "trying to do the right thing"? Are you eventually planning on getting custody?

Oh. And you need to change the topic title. You certainly are not a single Father as that, by definition, implies you are looking after the child, which you are clearly not, nor do you intend to

I have to agree with that statement. It really doesn't make you a father just because your name is on the birth certificate. If you feel it is your right to have the name stated then you should also feel it is your right to make sacrifices for that child and get a job and pay child support.

it sounds like a sad situation, whatever the circumstances, but it's up to you do your part of it right regardless of what she does.

I think they changed it recently and from the beginning of 2007 there will be Elterngeld, which as long as I understand will depend on one's income. I tried to find out how Elterngeld works with freelancers, but didin't have enough patience.

@McGee
BTW, it doesn't really matter, but how you can call yourself single father, if you don't live with the child?

I agree with sarabyrd here on it might be just difficult time for your girlfriend, if you want to be with your child you should provide support to her, did you do that?

He didn't, actually, the thread title got changed. IIRC the initial title was something like "Foreign father seeks advice".