A giant spider - eeek!

Help! A giant spider has invaded my apartment! A movement caught my eye and at first I thought it was a mouse. THAT's how big this sucker is. It's cooling its heels under a yogurt container right now.

What the HELL is it? Are there tarantulas in Germany? Are there poisonous spiders Germany, like black widows? How long will it take to die under there so I can stop avoiding that part of the room? That sucker is so big I'm afraid he's going to lift the container right up and off of himself, and make a meal of me while I sleep.

Arghhhhhhh (me making my best arachnophobic sounds)...

Maybe taking a ground floor apartment wasn't such a great idea. The fireflies invading my bedroom in the middle of the night a couple of months ago were bad enough, but this ...

Maybe related to this guy?

(I'm so glad I live on the 3rd floor - worst we have had is a ladybug infestation... )

My advice would be to put a pair of boots on- any will do- pick your favorite pair, if you like. And then stomp as hard as you can on that yogurt container. Et voilà! Problem solved.

oh lord, that would be like stomping on a mouse in my bare feet - which I've done, by accident... bleh. Scarred for life by it too. Anyone care to volunteer? I can't do it. I just can't.

Honestly- put a big ol' shoe on and do it- You won't feel a thing. And if you do it quickly enough, that spider won't feel it either. But as it stands, you're holding him prisoner and probably putting him in a very aggressive and foul mood. He's probably one of those spiders that can jump too. Yuck. Kill it!!

can't you just carry the little cutie outside?

Is it a taboo to kill spiders and in general insects here? I see that everyone tries to escape from them and not to harm them.

Slip a piece of card under the yogit container and lift it and chuck it out..

Cushti!

no, it's not taboo
some people murder them gleefully
other people prefer to rescue them

If it's nice and meaty, how about frying it for tea?

Actually, did you know it is illegal to kill spiders in Germany between six in the morning and noon, and between 2 in the afternoon and six in the evening. If you do manage to jump on the joghurt container, make sure no neighbour is watching, he'll more than likely call the Ordnungsamt.

ha hah. Waaaa!

Ok, I'm going to try the old "slip the paper" under the container thing. I don't want to deal with the mess that thing would make if I had to crape it off the floor...

Ok, in honour of Steve Irwin I saved the spider and took it outside. Holy cripes, that was a big one. I got a picture so I'll try to figure out how to upload it later.

And dont forget to dispose of it in the correct bin. Biomüll should be the one!

@Gills
You wouldn't perhaps be my neighbour or something? I had the bf kick out a giant spider out of the flat on Saturday evening at about midnight. Send me shrieking and running through the flat. Now I am used to having many spiders in the flat, but this one was different. It had thick legs and a big body. Just thinking back to it makes me all queasy

This is the perpetrator...

I think this is the chappy or wiki says this about him.
Juicy looking thingy eh?

Jebus, that is a biggy! I shoulda read this earlier and asked you to bring it around work - I could use it next time my German hypersensitive paranoid control freak co-worker who over-reacts to the aftermath of garlic gets on my nerves.

I got one that had a tiny body (about 1cm long, see below) and really long thin spindly legs (about 20cm "leg-span"). I didn't have anything big enough to go over it so I just left it in my bathroom. The next morning it had gone...

Gills, you've got mail.

it was just a bloody house spider.

mind, I always go for the stomp crunch wipe approach with spiders.

Ok Wee Mun, you're coming over here the next time that thing comes in. Then we'll see how tough you are!

Righter, that's the one. I can't read German - does the wiki say it, um, bites or anything?

Well this says that it'll chew your head off when you are sleeping:-
"Das Weibchen verlässt ihr Netz nur zur Nahrungsaufnahme"

haus spinner - house spider

The ones that usually climb back up the spout and are called incey wincey...

The Wee Mun spider exterminating services come at a price, all transport costs plus 1L of Augustiner per stomp

they can tickle your palm a bit when you pick them up but otherwise, they're pretty cool about it. just cup your hand over the top of it and then slowly close your fingers, keeping the gap between your thumb and forefinger as tight as possible so it doesn't leg it up your arm.

they're meaty fellers, so you won't damage them. i used to have these boys crawl across the sloping roof above my bed back in our old house in blighty, the place was full of them.

A bit of clay wrapped round it and straight onto the bbq, yum

Insane. You are insane (me - running screaming away)