American-style birthday cakes - Munich

My son is turning 4 on Saturday and we are having a birthday party. Is there anyone out there that is an "expert" birthday cake maker?

Have you tried the local baker? Take a picture with you. When my daughter wanted a cake with a picture of her horse on it, I showed him the foto and how big a cake we wanted and it was wonderful. The baker should have a foto album of all his cakes to show you give it a try.

What is an "American" birthday cake? (resisting the urge to spew out tired, self-deprecating stereotypes)

She means a cake with bright colors, spongie, and fun for a child and with 4 candles.

That makes it American?

As opposed to German, yes. German cakes are very different.

Don't they have them all in supermarkets like in the UK?

Try Hit and the V-Markt and Wally World

You can order cakes that at least look like American style birthday cakes (sheet cakes, frosted, with frosting decorations) at the Konditorei in Balanstrasse, near the corner with and on the town side of Orleanstrasse, across from Tassilo da Sebastiano restaurant and the motorcycle supplies store.

I don't know if they do shaped cakes or just rectangles, and I don't know what they taste like.

Look at this website for inspiration: Coolest birthday cakes

What's the difference between an American birthday cake and an English, or even German one? Is it just bigger?

In my experience, German don't really make themed birthday cakes. That is why it's so difficult to find stuff here. They will bake a normal round shape cake, write on it...and decorate it with shop bought decor stuff. Icing is also way too sweet for them, so they decorate with cream most of the time.

An 'American' cake is the kind that is cut into shapes...or even baked in a shaped pan. I think she just called it that ,in order to clarify what she means. The Americans have set the stage for these kind of cakes. Another great website for alll your cake needs: www.wilton.com

No supplier in Germany, now there's a business idea.

Here are just two examples for a hotdog cake

Getting cake decoration supplies here is an absolute nightmare, there are some shaped tins out there (Küstermann, Hertie et al - mostly Christmas or Easter themed) but for numbers cakes, you really have to shop online or bake normally and cut to shape.
Most pharmacies stock food colouring or can order it, it is behind the counter so you have to ask for it, those colours tend to be powder colours and are a bit stronger than the liquid ones in Hertie food hall etc. Pharmacies are also the place to get glycerine or liquid glucose for icing. Hertie at HBF does have some sugarpaste decorations, that Palatzky (sp?) wedding shop at Sendlinger Tor does great cake toppers and might be able to order other cake decorations as they also cover other events.
Good luck with your search and post a picture of the results!

mmmm... cake! Does frosting even exist in Germany? It seems like cakes in these parts are basically glorified pastries. Where can I get a slab of moist chocolate cake, with gobs of chocolate icing on top? And is there even a such thing as "German Chocolate Cake" here, or is that just something Americans invented (like those "Amerikaner" cookies they have here, that don't really exist in the U.S.)?

By the way, I recently had to explain to a coworker the difference between muffins and cupcakes. What kind of society is this?

One that thankfully hasn't been taken over by all things American, at least not yet.